What Not To Wear to the Beach

Yoox.com describe this as a “beach dress”, and while we’re not really seeing where the “dress” bit comes in, it is made by a company called VDP Beach, which would seem to support the idea that it is, in fact, beachwear, and not, say, some “sexy” clubwear.

It comes as a two-piece set, so yes, you ARE supposed to wear the legwarmers with the skirt. To the beach. We were going to assume the high wedges were optional, given that they’re not exactly practical for walking in the sand, but then, legwarmers and a mini skirt aren’t exactly practical for the beach either, so stranger things have happened.

Oh, and did we mention the full outfit is £140?

WHY would you want to dress like this to go to the beach, readers?

We don’t know about you, but when we go to the beach we’re there to have fun and relax, maybe take a dip in the sea. We can’t really imagine packing our beach bag and thinking, “OK, have I got everything? Sunscreen? Book? Leg warmers?” Can you? Is this what the cool kids are all wearing to the beach these days? Where ARE these beaches?

This is currently only available in a UK size 6, all the other sizes apparently having sold out. If that’s your size, though, you’re in luck: you can click here to part with your £140.



  • June 14, 2011


    it is a bit sluttish …

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  • June 14, 2011


    How can you call it a ‘dress’ when it has no top? A dress without a top is called a skirt! Or in this case, an Ace bandage.

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    • June 14, 2011


      Of course it has a top, you silly thing! It’s just a bit low cut, “plunging,” as they say, with multiple cut-outs.

      I think the look might be improved with elbow warmers though.

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  • June 15, 2011


    Those don’t look like leg warmers. They look like something that serves a medical purpose. I would assume they were covering healing wounds/burns if if I saw them. Nothing wrong with that if you need them, but very very wrong if you’re wearing them for “fashion”.

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  • June 20, 2011


    Can you imagine the tan lines?

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