Crimes of Fashion, Dresses

What not to wear to the Christmas party

Christmas_dress

With the Christmas season almost upon us, we’re guessing lots of you will be in the market for some formal evening wear to get you through all those parties. And boy, do we have just the gown for you!

Wear this and you won’t just look like the fairy on top of the Christmas tree, you’ll look like the Christmas tree itself, courtesy of all of that tinsel-like fringing that’s going on there. Or like a fairly elaborate lampshade. Either way, you’re sure to be the centre of attention – just for all the wrong reasons.

Tempted? It’s $538 and you can buy it here.

[Thanks to Fashion Police reader Sarah for the report!]
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Trousers/Pants

What not to wear to go clubbing

Clubbing

I have to admit, it’s been a long time since I last saw the inside of a club, but if this is what all you crazy kids are wearing in ’em these days, I guess it’ll be an even longer time before I venture back to one. This outfit was found in eDressMe’s clubbing section : witness how the super-wide palazzo pants have the curious effect of emphasising the crotch area; wonder at the width of those hems – hell you could smuggle in all your friends for free under those things! Finally, imagine how all that material would move when you danced: never mind a wall of sound, you’d be able to create your very own wall of fabric, courtesy of your wide leg pants!

Tell me, trendy young things: what do you wear to go clubbing? Does it look anything like this?

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