Crimes of Fashion, Shoes

Stella McCartney makes shoes for people with really, really pointy feet

Stella_mccartney_shoes

We like pointed toes, we really do, but as with most things in life, we like them in moderation. This? Isn’t really "moderation", is it? Not only could you take someone’s eye out with the toes (no, we have no idea why anyone’s eye would be level with your toes, but just work with us here), the fact that the uppers are almost skin coloured could make you look, not like you’re wearing exceptionally pointy shoes, but like you have exceptionally pointy feet. Surreal, granted, but maybe not the best look in the world. If you disagree, though, you can buy these for $665 at Neiman Marcus.

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Crimes of Fashion

Stella McCartney, what were you thinking?

Brownjumpsuit

Is that a low crotch I see before me? On a jumpsuit? Well, I’ll be darned.

I don’t know about you, but I would genuinely be curious to know what went through Stella McCartney’s head when she designed this… this thing. Who did she think would wear it, for instance? Female builders, perhaps? Ah, but no: the virgin wool and angora would surely not be the best choice of fabric for down the building site. How about young women out on the town? Well, no, I’m not sure it’d really be for them either, because it doesn’t so much say "rip me off and make mad, passionate love to me," as "Just rip me off. Please."

So I’m stumped. I can’t for the life of me imagine who would wear this. I would have said it’d be good for lounging around the house of an evening, but the peep toe heels it’s being worn with here say otherwise. On the other hand, I guess it would be a good uniform for the inmates of the Fashion Police Jailhouse, no?

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