Peaches Geldof’s leggings shredded by wild animals, Fashion Police investigating


 Peaches Geldof is a "celebrity" we tend to see rather a lot of these days, and now we're seeing even more of her, after her leggings were apparently mauled by a pack of wild animals as Peaches walked through central London, yesterday.

"This was a horrific attack on an innocent pair of black leggings," said a Fashion Police officer. "It left poor Peaches flashing rather more thigh than would generally be considered decent, and we'd hate to see the tan-lines she would've been left with if the sun had been out. Lovers of fashion should rest assured that the Force is pulling out all the stops to bring these depraved animals to justice – and we'll also be supplying Peaches with a proper pair of pants, pronto."

Sadly, these "legging shredding" crimes appear to be on the increase, which leaves us wondering if wild animals are REALLY to blame after all? Could there be a new fashion criminal in our midst: one even more dangerous than the evil Foot Snatcher? Stay tuned, readers…

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