It's with great sadness that The Fashion Police report the return of the dangerous and dastardly criminal known only as "The Foot Snatcher". Having previously snatched the feet of celebrities such as Victoria Beckham, Katie Holmes and others, the Foot Snatcher was believed to have gone into hiding following a high-profile Fashion Police investigation. However, this week he (or she) struck again, this time targeting Shopbop models, who were left without feet following the terrible attacks.
"Those poor girls," commented one witness, who declined to be named. "As if it wasn't bad enough that they were forced to wear huge, baggy pants with perplexing crosses on the butts, to have had their feet snatched was just the final insult."
The pants in question – believed to be VPL's "Swag" Pants - are now in custody, where they are "helping" The Fashion Police with their enquiries. Everyone with feet, however, is urged to be on their guard and take all reasonable precautions against THE FOOT SNATCHER.
'X' marks the spot…