Fashion Police

We’re taking the day off…

Good morning, Fashion Police officers! It’s a public holiday here in the UK, so we’re taking the day off: we’ll be back to business tomorrow, but until then, here are some older posts you might have missed…. The Chief of Police fesses up to buying a smock (the horror!) and getting stuck inside her clothes. That dastardly evil-doer known as The Clothes Ripper has struck again: check out his unfortunate victim here. Want to be one of those immaculately dressed people who never seem to have a hair out of place? Don’t want to have to get up early every morning to do it? Here are some tips on how to look good: fast… Missed out on that amazing item…

ham dress

A different kind of “meat dress”, by The Rodnik Band

Did you think Lady Gaga had the monopoly on “meat” dresses? We think you’ll find that’s just not true: Buy it The model’s face says it all, really, doesn’t it? It’s like she got dressed in the dark, and has only just realised what she’s wearing: a giant ham, basically. A sequinned one, though, obviously. Well, you wouldn’t be caught dead in a NON-sequinned ham, would you? The very thought! We’ve met the Rodnik Band, creators of this dress, before, of course. It’s the brand behind the infamous “urinal dress” and its sister, the “nude dress“, and it’s also the band which can turn your dream of dressing like a banana, a washing machine, or a piece of cheese into a reality:…

DOTD: Ted Baker ‘Miyaa’ feather applique motif dress

Ted Baker ‘Miyaa’ feather applique motif dress, £399 We were going to include this dress in our prom dress roundup earlier this week, but it was just too pretty not to name it Dress of the Day/Week/Month/Whatever. We’ll admit to a slight bit of bias here, because we’re suckers for a soft, mint green (if you’re not, this one is also available in black), but we’d probably love this dress in any colour. The full, pleated skirt, the feather appliqué bodice, the vintage-inspired feel of it. It’s a  special dress, for a special occasion, and it’s the kind of dress we can imagine wrapping up in tissue paper once that special occasion was done with, and carefully packing away, so we could hand…

OMG!

Fashion Confessions: I Got Stuck Inside My Clothes

In the latest in our Fashion Confessions series, Fashion Police founder Amber McNaught remembers that one time she got stuck inside her clothes. And by “that one time” she means “those two times”… I say I got stuck inside MY clothes: that’s not quite accurate. They were actually Zara’s clothes, and that’s Zara as in the store, not some friend of mine, who might have at least have been able to help me out of my predicament. So there I was, in the Zara changing rooms one fine day, clutching a fabulous pair of skinny jeans. Now, I don’t know about you, but I always find skinny jeans problematic in the fit department, and by that I mean “they don’t”. Fit,…

DOTD: Butterfly wrap dress from Oasis

Oasis butterfly wrap dress, £55 It’s often said in fashion circles that wrap dresses are “universally flattering”. Well, you all know The Fashion Police would never lie to you, so let’s just clear this one up: no, they’re really not. Wrap dresses can actually be pretty difficult on a lot of figures: if you’re large chested, for instance, they can gape around the bust, and if you’re particularly small chested… they can ALSO gape around the bust. No, wrap dresses are not for everyone, but for those of you who CAN wear them without having to layer something underneath (to eliminate that whole “gaping” issue) or constantly adjust the neckline and waist, this butterfly print dress from Oasis is a particularly sweet…

floral Zara dress

DOTD: Zara floral printed dress

Zara floral printed dress, £49.99 Like just about every other fashion brand out there, Zara have gone big on floral print this season, and our favourite floral item from the current collection has to be this white floral print dress. The cap sleeves and below-the-knee hem will have many people dismissing this dress as too frumpy, but the slim-fitting shape keeps this elegant and sophisticated. Those aren’t necessarily words we’d normally associate with floral-print dresses, which generally veer more into the “sweet and girlie” territory, but this one uses an understated print which is a little more grown-up than some of its floral sisters, and which we think looks more expensive than the £50 it’ll actually cost you – in…

Oasis Emma pleated mini dress

DOTD: Oasis Emma pleat midi dress

Oasis ‘Emma’ pleated midi dress, £85 Regardless of your stance on the appropriateness or otherwise of white before Memorial Day, this dress could be a good option for those who love pale colours, but shy away from blinding white. The creamy colour makes this a nice choice for summer days, and maybe even some late spring ones, too. It may look a little on the dressy side, but add a cardigan and any colour of shoes you fancy and it should be easy enough to dress down, too. We challenge you not to do a bit of spinning in this one to make that skirt skin out, too. Or is that just us? Buy it

pink prom dress

DOTD: Miss Selfridge pink prom dress

Pink prom dress, £55 Every so often, Miss Selfridge surprises us with a piece of vintage-inspired loveliness that has us wishing for somewhere to wear it… other than to a prom in 1956, obviously. This dress wouldn’t look out of place in the 50s – or not in terms of the style, anyway. The 100% polyester fabric probably won’t be a patch on a true vintage dress, but of course, that’s why this one will only cost you £55. This is available in UK sizes 4 – 16: get it here.

Karen Millen dress

DOTD: Karen Millen structured jersey dress

 Karen Millen structured jersey dress, £160 If you’ve been reading this site for any length of time at all, you’ll probably already know that we’re big fans of keeping things simple. This is something that’s often looked down upon in fashion circles, where complex, layered looks are admired, and “simple” is often equated with “boring”, but clean lines and unfussy silhouettes just do it for us, and this Karen Millen dress is a good example of that.  The lilac/grey colour is sweet but not saccharine, the shape is classic-but-contemporary, and the slim black belt is all that’s needed to define the waist and add a touch of contrast. Add a comfortable jersey fabric, and you have a dress that will last for years…

DOTD: ASOS pencil dress in floral jaquard

ASOS pencil dress, £85 Good old ASOS: they’ve released several variations on this dress over the past year, and we don’t think we’ll every get tired of it. Of all of them, however, this one has to be our favourite, and not just because it’s green (and white), or because it’s being modelled by our current favourite ASOS model, who we affectionately know as Always Shocked Girl. No, this dress is our favourite because it’s just a little bit more “special” than many ASOS dresses, being constructed from a floral jacquard fabric which is well worth a closer look. That higher-quality fabric comes with a correspondingly higher price tag, though, and at £85, this is a little more expensive than…

Happy Easter from The Fashion Police!

It might not feel much like Springtime, but the Easter weekend is upon us, and The Fashion Police are taking a couple of days off to rest, recuperate – and probably get our Spring/Summer clothes out of storage, even although that’s just a little bit optimistic of us right now. Whether you’re celebrating the holiday, enjoying the long weekend, or just getting on with business as usual, we hope you have fun doing it, and we’ll see you back here on Tuesday, with more crimes of fashion and style sleuthing. Happy Easter! Image: Stock.xchng | Banner image: © Cenorman | Dreamstime Stock Photos &Stock Free Images

blue tea dress

DOTD: Topshop branch floral tea dress

Topshop branch floral tea dress, £46 Ah, the floral tea dress! Considered a summer classic by many, one of the great things about these dresses is that they can look just as good layered up with tights, boots and cardis as they can with bare legs and sandals: a good thing for those of us who live in the UK, and don’t normally get to experience “summer”. We couldn’t decide which colour to show you, so we decided just to go with both. One word of warning, though: these seem to be proving popular, and not all sizes are available, so if you can’t find yours online, you may need to check in-store. Buy them

stripe ballgown

DOTD: Oscar de la Renta striped silk-blend gazar gown

Oscar de la Renta striped silk-blend gazar gown, $6,790 We don’t tend to feature floor-length gowns here at Dress of the Day, purely because, as pretty as they can be, we just can’t imagine ever having to wear one. Obviously this doesn’t stop us from featuring lots of OTHER totally impractical dresses here, of course, but somehow we can always imagine finding SOME excuse to wear a shorter dress, but long ones? Not so much. Sadly the lifestyle of a Fashion Police officer just doesn’t provide many opportunities for formal evening-wear. (This is also why we’re always puzzled by the deluge of “Get the Oscars look!” press releases we et after the Academy Awards every year, in which various brands try…

Fashion Confessions: I bought a smock

Fashion Confessions: I Bought a Smock

In the first of a new series, Fashion Police editor Amber McNaught shares some of her adventures in the fashion wilderness, starting with a confession which might shed some light on the reasons behind The Fashion Police’s hatred of smocks… (…but it wasn’t this smock.) Fashion Confessions # 1: I bought a smock. Oh, don’t worry: it wasn’t recent. And it wasn’t the smock in the photo, either (although it wasn’t all that different from it, if the truth be told…).  Actually, I was about 16 at the time, and the smock in question was beige (yes, beige), voluminous, and it quite possibly had some kind of Peter Pan collar, too, if memory serves. However ugly you’re imagining that smock…

blue J Crew dress

DOTD: J Crew printed silk and cotton-blend dress

J Crew printed silk and cotton-blend dress, £500 Our thought process with this one was as follows: Oooh! Pretty dress! Lovely, simple shape! Love that sky blue colour: would look so great with green, or even red! Ooh! Parrot print! Oh, J Crew, awesome: let’s check the price! £500? FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS?! “…” In its defence, it is silk. (Partly silk, anyway. Silk blend.) And is IS pretty. Would you pay £500 for it, though? If you would, you can get it here.

sneering model in see-through top

Shocking smocking: ugly dresses and other crimes of fashion

We begin our weekly crimes of fashion roundup with a public service announcement on the subject of ugly dresses, specifically, SMOCKS. Smocks look good on no one. We don’t often make such blanket assertions, it’s true: normally we try to couch our proclamations of fashion crimes in the language of “some people look fantastic in them!” and “if you love them, wear them: you go, girl!” Not today. No, today we’re going to have the courage of our convictions, and say it again: smocks look good on no-one. Case in point: Ugly dresses, or totes adorbs? Find them here and here. Two gorgeous models. In smocks. And while the models look cute as little buttons, that’s because… the models are cute as…

polka dot dress with bow

DOTD: Helene Berman polka dot shift dress

Helene Berman polka dot shift dress, £159.99 We need a polka dot intervention. Actually, you know what? We don’t. Because there’s no crime in loving a certain look, print or style, and  one of our big loves is for all things dotty, so we may as well indulge it while the shops are full of spots. Our latest fixation is this Helene Berman shift dress, which combines the playful print with a classic, shift dress shape, plus a dinky little bow at the waist. Although polka dots work (for us) in just about any combo they come in, this black and white version is a particularly versatile one, as it will serve as a more-or-less blank canvas for whatever other…

Follow The Fashion Police…

As we’re sure you know by now, Google Reader will be closing down this July. Here are some other ways to follow The Fashion Police, and make sure you never miss another crime of fashion… Twitter: A link to each of our new posts is automatically posted to our Twitter account, which you’ll find here. Because of the high level of abuse we get on Twitter from lovely people who think we’re Joan Rivers or Kelly Osbourne (despite the disclaimer on the profile), this account is unmonitored, so if you’d like to contact us on Twitter, rather than simply getting notifications of new posts, you can follow our editor here. Facebook: Again, each new post is automatically published to our…

Top Ten: bird print pieces on the high street

Oriental birdcage top, £30, Oasis Bird print: like florals, it comes around every spring. Also like florals, it’s fresh, feminine, and a pretty obvious choice for things like sundresses and skirts. (It’s probably worth noting here that many bird prints actually contain florals as part of the design, hence the similarities). This is also a rather more whimsical, quirky kind of print than its floral sister, though, so if you like to be able to use those particular words to describe what you’re wearing, it might just be for you. We’ve tracked down ten bird print pieces, all available now on the UK high street. These range from cute tops and simple scarves to bird print dresses and skirts: take…