Crochet Crimes: The crochet monokini



To: The Fashion Police
From: Katie
Subject: Wow

"Have your eye bleach ready!"

*  *  *

Wow, indeed. And "eye bleach". We like that. In fact, we think it should be standard issue for everyone on our fashion force.

And we should say again: there's an idea that goes around that The Fashion Police hate all forms of crochet. No, no, no! We don't hate crochet at all: unless, of course, it's bright orange, and has been added to a bikini, in an apparent bid to make the wearer look like a fluorescent spider came along and spun a web between boobs and briefs while she was sunbathing. That kind of crochet, we hate.


  • May 11, 2009


    What happens when it gets wet? I don’t think wool comes in water-proof>

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  • May 11, 2009


    Fran, I don’t think its there for getting wet (ie swimming) But I can imagine the tan lines too, so apart from being a hideous garment it is enitirely useless too!

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  • May 11, 2009


    ack! is it just me or is she also suffering from bobbleheaditis in addition to wearing the worst use of crochet hooks almost ever?
    poor poor aubrey o’day look alike

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  • May 11, 2009

    Rock Hyrax

    Did they have to make her pose like she was in a workshop calendar?

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  • May 12, 2009


    I’m just picturing the tan lines that come with a bathing suit like that…

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  • May 13, 2009


    Is it just me or is none of that waterproof? I can’t quite tell, I just bleached my eyes.

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  • May 28, 2009


    Ugh! Something about this just says “costume” to me. I don’t think i’d like it, even without the crochet. I guess you can at least give them credit for being daring?

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