Ask the Fashion Police

why models look dead

Why models look dead, and other fashion questions answered

Every so often, The Fashion Police delve into our virtual mailbag by consulting the search terms people type into Google which lead them to this site. Many of those terms take the form of questions, so, in order to try to help those poor lost souls wandering out there in the fashion wilderness, we take it upon ourselves to answer those questions (or try to, anyway). Here are some of the burning questions on our visitor’s minds this month: if you’ve ever wondered why models look dead, and if you really HAVE to wash your clothes, read on… Why do models look dead? Didn’t you hear? Looking alive is SO last season… OK, to give this a more serious answer:…

how to find items that are sold out

Out of Stock: How to find those sold out items

OUT OF STOCK: three little words guaranteed to make every fashion-lover’s heart sink. We all know the feeling, don’t we? You find something you absolutely love: maybe on Pinterest, maybe on a blog – maybe even on THIS blog. You know you have to have it, so you click excitedly on the link, you wait for the page to load, and…. OUT OF STOCK. Gah. So, what do you do when the item you love is out of stock? Well, many of you come here and ask The Fashion Police where to find it, which is why we’ve put together some tips and tricks which might help you track down that out of stock item. Note the word might, though:…

How to Wear a Midi Dress

… without looking frumpy “How to wear a midi dress” and “what shoes to wear with a midi dress” are two of the most frequently asked questions by visitors to the Fashion Police, and it’s not hard to see why. Ever since the midi dress came back into fashion a couple of years ago, they’ve become pretty ubiquitous, with most mass-market retailers stocking at least one midi for all of the legions of mini skirts which are their more usual fare. Although midi dresses are now easy to find, though, they’re not necessarily easy to wear. In fact, this can be one of the most troublesome lengths of all: it’s very easy to look frumpy in a dress that hits…

how to spot a crime of fashion

How to spot a crime of fashion

Last week, in our random roundup, we made reference to consulting the Fashion Crimes Checklist. What we didn’t mention is that this is an ACTUAL checklist, distributed to trainee officers to help them quickly and easily tell the difference between a crime of fashion and a completely innocent item of clothing. It might help you one day, too, so without further ado, allow us to introduce… The Crimes of Fashion Checklist: How to spot a crime of fashion in progress. Spotted a potential fashion infraction? Not sure whether to call The Fashion Police, make a citizen’s arrest, or simply look the other way? Just ask yourself the following questions… 1. Could you wear a diaper under it? Harem pants, and…

How to wear stripes

How to wear stripes… whatever your figure

Want to wear stripes? Worried they’ll make you look wider than you are, or otherwise accentuate things you’d rather keep hidden? Been told a million times that stripes are only for the slender? Don’t listen to the naysayers: there are lots of ways to wear stripes, whatever your shape – let The Fashion Police show you how…

Five quick winter fashion fixes

  winter fashion at A|Wear Last week we told you how to stay stylish in winter. This week, we bring you five specific items (or types of items) we can’t live without in the battle to keep warm without resorting to wearing an adult onesie. Here they are… jersey blazer: Mango Jersey blazer/coatigan It’s great to snuggle up in a cosy sweater or oversized cardigan, but if you work in an office, say, or just need to look a little bit pulled together, baggy knitwear isn’t always the answer. Instead, find a jersey blazer or what the retailers like to term a “coatigan” (it looks a bit like a coat, but it’s actually a cardigan. Get it?): it’ll be more…

How to stay stylish in the winter

[Dunnes Stores] As we observed last week, winter presents all kinds of problems when it comes to getting dressed AND staying stylish, and all too often we end up putting warmth before fashion (as we should, of course) and stumbling through the season looking like we’re contestants in some strange kind of Supermarket Sweep gameshow, the aim being to pile on as many items of clothing as we can, in the shortest time possible. People, it doesn’t have to be this way. There ARE ways to stay stylish in cold weather. Here are just a few of them…   [Accessorize] 1. Wrap up Now, before you go sighing loudly and closing down the browser, berating us for telling you things…

What to wear to a christening

What to wear?

Of all of the questions The Fashion Police are asked on a daily basis, the most frequent are the ones beginning with the words “What to wear…?” We’ve answered quite a few of these now (some with the help of our readers), so, just in case you’re new around here, here are some of the posts we’ve written in a bid to answer that most important of all questions: what ON EARTH to wear? What to wear to a wedding We’ll probably all attend at least one wedding in our lifetimes (in fact, some summers it might feel like we’re attending at least one wedding every WEEK), but what to wear to a wedding remains one of the biggest sartorial…

How old is too old for skinny jeans?

Style SOS: How old is too old for skinny jeans?

This week, a lot of you have been finding The Fashion Police after asking Google the question, “How old is too old for skinny jeans?” It seems a lot of you are suddenly wondering if it’s time to hang up your jeans, so let us try to put you out of your misery and work out just how old IS too old for this particular look, anyway? For us, this question, and, indeed, any other fashion-related question beginning with the phrase “How old is too old for…” can be answered fairly easily: You’re too old for <insert fashion trend here> when it no longer looks good or feels comfortable. It’s a simple and as difficult as that, really. There’s no…

Winter Wardrobe Essentials for Women

[winter wardrobe essentials available at Oliver Bonas] A couple of weeks ago, we talked about the so-called “wardrobe essentials” we DON’T really need, and then we asked you to tell us about the ones you DO. Now, having consulted your suggestions and noted the common themes, we’re pleased to present The Fashion Police’s own list of what REALLY constitutes a “wardrobe essential”. Just to keep things simple, we’re sticking to one season at a time – in this case, winter – and before we go any further, we want to add a quick disclaimer to say that these are simply the items which were suggested most often by our readers: obviously not every woman is the same, so you may…

How to make cheap clothes look like designer clothes

How to make cheap clothes look like designer clothes*

 (*Well, almost like designer clothes…) In an ideal world, The Fashion Police would walk around clad head-to-toe in designer clothing. Everything we wore would be lovingly made from the highest-quality fabric, by the most skilled seamstresses the fashion world has to offer. (Actually, can we be totally honest here? Even if we miraculously became filthy rich overnight, we don’t think we’d be able to resist a quick look around our favourite high-street haunts every now and then. Low price doesn’t ALWAYS mean low quality, of course, and once a bargain hunter, always a bargain hunter…) But this isn’t an ideal world. Like many people, if we want to indulge our love of fashion, we often have to shop from the…

How to dress up an outfit

Style SOS: How to dress up an outfit

[Image: Next] Got a hot date right after work? An important meeting you totally forgot was happening? Or maybe you just slept late, tumbled out of bed at the last possible second, and now need a quick and easy way to look like you put some effort into your outfit – even when you totally didn’t. Here are five easy ways to instantly dress up an outfit, without actually getting “all dressed up”…

Wearing white after Labor day

Style SOS: Wearing White After Labor Day

[All items: Zara] Today is Labor Day in the United States, so we figured it was the perfect time to re-visit the old “Never wear white after Labor day” fashion “rule”. This one may have died out a little amongst younger generations, but we’re still surprised by how often we see it quoted in fashion magazines and on blogs, so we thought we’d take a closer look and try to decide if it’s a rule that’s really worth observing. Now, if you’re not in the US, you may be a little bit confused by this one. We don’t observe Labor Day here in the UK, for instance, and we don’t really have any seasonal “rules” about colour, either. For the…

What to wear to a christening (And what NOT to wear…)

What to wear to a Christening or baptism is one of the most frequently asked question here at The Fashion Police, so let’s jump right in and talk christening attire… What to Wear to a Christening What to Wear to a christening: the basics Like weddings, christenings are formal events, which means that a certain formality of dress is expected of those in attendance. Unlike weddings, however, the good news is that  there aren’t many strange superstitions or colour-based clothing rules attached to them, so you’re much less likely to offend someone by turning up in the wrong thing. They’re also slightly less “dressy” than weddings, so unless you’re a Godparent, or, well, the baby, you’re probably not going to…

Why it’s not OK to wear white to a wedding

A small sample of the keyword searches which recently led people to The Fashion Police: Can you wear white to a wedding? Is it bad to wear white to a wedding? Should you wear white to a wedding? Is it wrong to wear white to a wedding? Is it STILL wrong to wear white to a wedding?  Can you wear white to someone else’s wedding? Why is it wrong to wear white to a wedding? And just about every other variation of that question you can possibly imagine. OK, people, listen up, because this is the last time we’ll say this: NO, YOU SHOULD NOT WEAR WHITE TO A WEDDING.* Yes, it is STILL considered to be a faux pas…

leggings are not pants

STYLE SOS: Why leggings are not pants, and other fashion questions answered

Seeing as it’s Friday, and just a hop, skip and a jump to the weekend, we figured we’d kill some time by answering some of the serious style questions from our postbag, a.k.a our search referrers. Here are some of the burning questions you’ve been asking the Fashion Police this week… Can you wear white to a wedding? Only if you’re the bride. Can you wear tights in the summer? Yes, you can: no harm will befall you. Dress according to the weather, not according to the  calendar. Reasons why leggings are not pants? Does this answer your question? No? Well, leggings are designed to be worn under other garments, such as tunics, dresses, or other, longer items. Because of…

Ask The Fashion Police: Can I wear maroon and teal together?

Maroon and teal: should they ever meet? A few days ago, we re-opened our Formspring account, which means we’re preparing ourselves for the usual barrage of questions from people who: a) Think we’re a shop and b) Think we’re Joan Rivers.(Note: we are not Joan Rivers.) We do tend to get some serious style-related questions, though, and here is the first of them: Q: Can I wear maroon and teal together? I have a maroon shirt and teal shoes that I’d like to wear together, but I’ve heard it’s a bad combination. . . Well, the good news here is that, thanks to the ongoing trend for colourblocking, you can wear pretty much ANY two colours together and call it…