Wear or Die: Strange Shoes

Wearor-die-shoes

We haven't had a footwear edition of Wear or Die for a while now, so without further ado, let's sit back, relax and… try to imagine what we'd do if someone forced us to choose one of the pairs of shoes above – on pain of death.

Would the relative comfort of Option B allow you to overlook the fact that you're essentially wearing a couple of rodents (moles? We're not sure: answers on a postcard) on your feet, or  do you prefer to stick your feet in a giraffe instead?

Mole, giraffe or … death: what's it to be?

45 Comments

  • April 8, 2009

    Danny

    Giraffe shoes, definitely.
    They’re ugly and weird, but they’re nowhere as creepy as the mole ones…
    I’d rather look quirky than have people think I became homeless and started killing rodents and turning them into footwear.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    gokarm

    Well congratulations you finally creeped me out. Those Mole shoes give me the heebiest of jeebies. I feel like they’d start wriggling with every step I took, and then I would fall down dead. Seriously, I’d be sweating with fear. So…I’d wear the giraffe shoes…they’re a little dali-esque, but please believe, that doesn’t mean I’m condoning them!

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Nithya

    Death! Death would be a relief!

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Veronika

    the moles:DD ok, so they’re creepy as hell but I totally hate the giraffe heels too much to even consider them. and I know my dog would loooove the moles.. althou he wouldnt leave me alone for as long as I’d have them on.. but if Buddy’s happy, I’m happy:)

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Lisa

    The giraffe shoes, totally. I laughed out loud when I saw them, whereas the mole shoes made my skin crawl.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Arielle

    I appear to be the opposite of most people here, in that the giraffe heels creep me out a lot more than wearing rodents. The mole shoes would provide me with plenty of comic relief watching the reactions when people noticed them. In fact, I would wear them while grocery shopping in the hopes that people would give me and my creepy rodent shoes wide berth!

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Marianne

    Giraffe. And a terminal case of “the monster that ate my feet” at the same time. If it weren’t for the creepy back legs, I’d wear them openly.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    peachfish

    I’d have to go with the giraffe shoes. We all know real giraffe legs are much bigger than that, so these shoes could at least NOT be made of actual giraffe, wheras the mole shoes do seem to be made of actual moles. Plus I don’t like footwear that looks like it might bite someone.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Evelyn

    Definitely the giraffe shoes…at least they are funny looking, not macabre…

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Sarah

    I hate the giraffe shoes. They honestly do creep me out way more than the mole shoes, I don’t know why. Plus, I have to walk a lot during the day, and I’m not coordinated in regular heels, much less *these kind. And as an added bonus, the mole shoes remind me of slippers I had when I was younger. So I’d definitely wear the mole shoes.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Theresa

    The giraffe shoes aren’t nearly as creepy. I wouldn’t even want to be within ten feet of the mole shoes, much less wear them.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Kathleen

    I choose the giraffe shoes because at least from the front, they look somewhat normal and I’d just wear some long pants to cover up the heel. As for the other shoes…they’re just wrong.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    nj

    i’d go mole….moley moley moley mole
    mostly just so i could laugh at everyone’s reaction to them

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Celecita

    I’d go giratte for sure, because the heel is cute, kinda wish there weren’t 2 legs, but hey, at least it doesnt have a face

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Kate

    What Danny said. Giraffe, for sure.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Wendy Moira

    The mole slippers are… positively macabre. Although the more normal end of the giraffe heels look like something my grandmother would wear (one among many complaints to the maker of…. giraffe high heels…..), the mole slippers are terrifying. I pick giraffe heels.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Benthe

  • April 8, 2009

    Fran

    Well… Painfully I´d go with the giraffe ones. At least I won´t be walking around with strange looking furry elf shoes.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Anna

    Giraffes, deff. As bizare as they are, I REALLY wouldn’t want to stick my feet inside some dead rats or moles or whatever the hell those things are supposed to be.
    *shudders*

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Melanie

    The moles are just heinous – my flesh crawls just at the thought of wearing them .. possibly cause they look like actual taxidermied moles, and therefore wearing them would involve putting your foot inside the poor little animals’ carcass. The giraffes, whilst ugly, are kinda funny/surreal and less nauseating.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Jilly

    Giraffe. Definitely Giraffe.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    b.

    I agree with Peachfish. I look at the mole shoes and can’t make myself believe they’re not dead animals into whose lifeless guts I should put my feet. And that freaks me out.

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    net

    The giraffe shoes. They’re hideous but hilarious. Also, I live in New York City, and wouldn’t want the mole shoes to be mistaken for rats. Ewww…

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Anne Pink

    I like the giraffe shoes, thayre awesome (In a way)

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Rock Hyrax

    I’m another one who agrees with peachfish, though I don’t really believe those miniature giraffe-leg heals are feasible. Also the mole ones remind me of that episode of One Foot in the Grave where Victor ends up wearing a hedgehog slipper.
    Oh, and according to what I just looked up, moles belong to the group of insectivores called talpidae. (Sorry, couldn’t resist!)

    View Comment
  • April 8, 2009

    Jenny

    Option A! I would totally wear them, they’re sooooo cute! They even have 2 heels for their little legs.

    View Comment
  • April 9, 2009

    Fozzie

    I agree with Net. The giraffe ones are kinda fabulous, in a really weird way. I don’t want the mole slipper shoes. No!

    View Comment
  • April 9, 2009

    chocoholic

    Giraffe. The moles look too real.

    View Comment
  • April 9, 2009

    Karyn

    I laughed so much reading these comments.

    View Comment
  • April 9, 2009

    Camilla

    Death. It has to be death.

    View Comment
  • April 9, 2009

    lea

    Giraffe. No question. Moles are just disgusting. There’s absolutely no way I’d put my feet in them. Whoever made them must be sick!

    View Comment
  • April 10, 2009

    Linda

    Giraffe shoes, definitely! Those mole shoes are sick! Where oh where do you find these things?!!

    View Comment
  • April 11, 2009

    Lindsay

    death…for sure.
    these are unbearably hideous.
    ahhhh. they’re killing me already.

    View Comment
  • April 11, 2009

    Paputsza

    I have an agenda against giraffe print. They’re pretty animals, but they pee on their mate’s tongue when they’re ready to mate and that’s not cool. I still would rather wear the giraffe shoes since at least they’re heals. The mole shoes look like they were made from real moles, and I’m against wearing an animal’s claws and eyes.
    I’m not sure that these shoes are real, where would I get them?

    View Comment
  • April 24, 2009

    Eric

    I’d much prefer bare(sic) feet. So I suppose it’s death for me.

    View Comment
  • May 13, 2009

    bexx

    giraffe, no q
    i HATE them but im terrified of rats and i agree with peachfish abt the rest too

    View Comment
  • May 28, 2009

    Nimbus

    I prefer giraffes. I think their heels are cute, not creepy at all like the overgrown rat shoes!!

    View Comment
  • May 29, 2009

    Diandra

    lol! The giraffe heels are cute. Maybe not for wearing, but just for having. In fact, they remind me of that leg lamp from “The Christmas Story!” So, I pick those. The mole slippers, however, remind me of those huge, ugly rat things from “The Princess Bride.” Ugh…is that one’s eye glowing??

    View Comment
  • June 15, 2009

    Xtine

    Tea and cake, please.

    View Comment
  • July 30, 2009

    Kathleen

    WHERE ARE THESE FROM?!?
    the moles are so FREAKY. but i think i would wear them just for a reaction.
    i must get a pair right now.

    View Comment
  • February 17, 2010

    Amee

    I actually really like the moles.And I cannot walk in heels The Giraffes aren’t that bad either..art shoes.

    View Comment
  • August 9, 2010

    Kat

    I actually like the giraffe heels, simply because the two heels would give me more support than normal stilettos. I would find these quite comfortable. I’d end up wearing them with a light brown skirt and a blue peasant top. maybe with a cream corset on top of the top. you know, one of those corsets that just accentuates the waist?

    View Comment
  • August 15, 2010

    Spark

    Giraffe ones are kind of cool. I like these.. for their artistic merits. Would I wear them? Maybe the giraffe.. for laughs.

    View Comment
  • September 13, 2010

    Jessica

    Who makes these shoes? Does anyone know?

    View Comment
  • November 3, 2012

    Nala

    Giraffe. The mole shoes freak me out.

    View Comment