Ok, we promise this is not another harem pants abuse post. It’s more a question of definition, seeing as The Fashion Police are a little confused by these particular trews. Largely because to us they look suspiciously like a drainpipe, cropped version of last decade’s combat pants.
Yes, in the late 90s bands like All Saints persuaded us all that combat trousers and skinny fit t-shirts were the height of fashion, and the silk version – well, they were just all the more clubbing appropriate! We all rocked this look until we realised how scruffy we looked, and that, as combats and stilettos were bad bedfellows, and the best part of going out was the dressing up, we were being robbed of valuable high-heels-appropriate occasions!
Of course, this new look silk version of the humble combat doesn’t steal time from our shoe collection in the same way that its predecessor did. But is that enough to sell the look back to you?
As if the harem pant weren’t controversial enough, Alexander Wang has taken it a step further making it sheer. These chiffon lingerie pants, $450, are a bit confusing. The subtle paper-bag waist, slouchy silhouette and not-too-baggy harem-ness of the pants actually start to convince us that the style is actually rather chic. We can see an old Hollywood screen siren wearing them to bed – as actual lingerie, as the name implies.
But the problem is that people will definitely wear them out in public. Does that become a problem? The opaque boxer-short-like lining bothers us. We understand why it’s there, dear God some modesty is in order. But still…it looks weird, no?
The Fashion Police’s eagle-eyed officers have been fighting a crime wave of late, in the form of animal print trousers. Quite aside from our uncertainty over the credentials of animal print as a sartorial choice, the trend seems to be to ensure that this print adorns the least flattering trousers that people will buy. And since so many buy into the diaper look, that’s a significantly tall order!
The Dolce & Gabbana leo print jeans, for example, are in fact a cotton denim, but look so alike in style and texture to the popular moleskin designs of the 90s, you could be forgiven for expecting them to be soft to the touch. And if you really want value for your €455,00 check out the crotch area: the pattern cleverly creates something between a camel toe and codpiece effect, if such a thing is possible!
If you’re on a tighter budget and a fan of the afore-mentioned diaper look, hit the high street, where Dorothy Perkins have come up trumps with their Animal harem jersey pants for £25. As inoffensive as harem pants can be from the front, it’s the rear of these that really gives them that “saggy chic” edge…
So, what are your feelings about animal print bottoms? The Fashion Police strive to treat all animal print items on a case-by-case basis… but we’re fighting the little voice in our heads that consistently tells us to Just Say No.
We were so distracted, nay, hypnotised by the psychedelic pattern on these little beauties, we weren’t even sure which category to file them under: Ugly harem pants? Dressing like a toddler? They do have that diaper-accommodating look about them after all…
In the end it didn’t seem right to send them down without a fair trial, so we thought we’d put them before you, the jury, to decide. Because there’s just that little niggling doubt in our minds that, in fact, the self same fabric in a skirt or the skirt of a dress would be rather fabulous!
If you’re in the “not guilty” camp you can get a pair of swirl print fisherman pants from the Jaeger website for £299.
Well, readers, it’s official: harem pants have made it to the red carpet (or concrete sidewalk, in this case), and on no less a person than Juliette Binoche, famed for her classical beauty and chic French style.
The world mourns.
Or does it? The Fashion Police will probably never come to terms with the dropped crotch, but it seems the rest of the world is willing to embrace it, and we can’t help but feel that Juliette’s endorsement of the crotch is a telling moment in fashion history. Has the harem finally become a style staple? Will diaper-pants compete with little black dresses as the go-to party piece for women all over the world. Do these pants actually look… dare we say it… good?
We’re confused, and a little bit frightened. It’s like the world we know has turned on its axis, and now everything we formerly believed was wrong. If you look hard enough, we’re pretty sure that’s a flying pig in the background of the photo.
Help us out here, readers. Do you think Juliette Binoche is working the hell out of these pants?
It’s animal print and it’s a harem pant jumpsuit. Seriously, need we say more?
Actually yes, because this particular specimen does have one thing working in its favour. It’s currently on sale. So, if you feel you could work this look, you can buy it reduced from £25 to £20 from Dorothy Perkins.
We’ve all been there – the sun makes its first appearance of the year and, in celebration, we over-indulge in our good friends, Ben and Jerry. Suddenly we’re aware that bikini season is on its merry way – and there’s nothing for it but to hit the gym.
But what should one wear to workout this season? How about some of these delightful hareem joggers from Dorothy Perkins? (£20)
We challenge any amongst you to pull these beautifully cut pants on, check yourself out in the gym’s full-length mirrors and not want to work-out that little bit harder to get rid of that deceptively large-looking rear, those tree-trunk thighs and protruding belly… Because that’s just what these joggers will make of your figure, no matter how svelte you are to begin with!
Of course, Dorothy Perkins don’t suggest you actually wear these to work out in (heavens no!). They suggest pairing them with a white vest tee and grey strappy heels. What do you think – could you pull this “fresh-from-my-workout” look off, or should these pants stay buried in the gym bag where they belong?
It took us a few minutes to work out what we were actually looking at here: at first glance it looks like a simple harem pant crime, but look closer and you’ll see that these are no ordinary harem pants: no, these ones have leggings attached to them. Yes, leggings.
Now pants and leggings is a pretty impossible combination, which is probably why Boohoo.com describe this garment as a “harem skirt with leggings”. Fashion Police reader, Kishen, who reported this to us, said she wasn’t sure whether she loved the idea or hated it, so we leave it up to you to decide, readers. What do you think of this? If you love it, it’s £20 and you can buy it here.
