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christopher kane

Crimes of Fashion, Shoes

Christopher Kane embroidered silk and satin sandals: almost as ugly Crocs

Christopher Kane silk and satin sandals

When you read the words “silk and satin sandals” in the headline of this post, you probably weren’t expecting THESE, were you? And we don’t know about you, jurors, but if WE were going to be spending £706 on a pair of shoes, we probably wouldn’t want them to look like a cross between a toddler shoe and an old lady shoe. Which these do.

(And yeah, yeah, WE KNOW: they’ll be So! Comfy! Just like Crocs! But honestly, we don’t care about the So! Comfy! because, like Crocs, these are So! Ugly! they almost make our eyes bleed. There are other ways, readers! “Comfortable” doesn’t HAVE to go hand-in-hand with “ugly”: step into the light, and away from the Frankenshoes…)

This does beg an important question, however: why ARE comfortable shoes often ugly? Answers in the comments box…

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Christopher Kane’s ‘eye popping’ skirt

Christopher Kane laser-cut leather pleated skirtNet-a-Porter call this an “eye popping take on a ladylike design”.  Well it’s certainly that alright, but we’re not sure we want our eyes popped quite that much.  If you feel like you need sunglasses to look at your skirt, that’s probably a sign that it’s a bit too bright folks.

This is made of pleated leather, and the lace design has been laser cut which we suppose goes some way to justifying the £1,610 price tag.  But where would you wear a neon yellow pencil skirt?   If you have any ideas where to wear it, we’d love to know and you can buy it here.

Dresses, Style On Trial

Style on Trial: Christopher Kane ‘Jenny’ leather and lace embroidered dress

This dress sold out almost instantly when it arrived at Net-a-Porter a few weeks ago, which kinda surprised us really because, quite apart from the £2,225 price tag, the combination of leather, lace and floral embroidery just didn’t strike us as the kind of thing that would have widespread appeal, especially when you consider the back view:

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Dresses, Style On Trial

Style on trial: Christopher Kane Freja embroidered dress

The Fashion Police’s opinion on sheer clothing is well-documented. Shresses, sheggings, shants – you name them, we’ve put them on trial. This dress may not really fall into the shress category, having all the really vital body parts essentially covered, but it is still distinctly suspect.

The Fashion Police feel that this particular number is best suited to its rightful place under the lime lights; whether on an ice rink or ballroom floor is open to interpretation. Because, however graceful and talented, neither figure skaters nor ballroom dancers are particularly highly-praised for their sartorial choices. “Costume” is never a good look down the pub on a Friday night…

Neither is it a good look for a wedding guest, as this week’s Net-a-Porter newsletter would have us believe. The sartorial sin of out-costuming the bride aside, we’re pretty sure that much thigh is inappropriate congregation-wear.

But what do you think? Can you see a different side to this dress? If so you can buy it at Net-a-Porter for £3,090.

Fashion Police

Christopher Kane for Topshop: what do you think?

christopher-kane-crocodile-With all of the fashion weeks and award shows we’ve had to police this month, Christopher Kane’s latest collection for Topshop almost managed to slip under the Fashion Police radar.

We’re correcting that now, though, by bringing you a selection of items for the new line, including  this crocodile print dress which is basically a cheaper version of the gorilla prints Kane released as part of his main collection earlier this year.

You can view more of the collection for Topshop below the jump, or at the Topshop website. Be warned, though: you can only buy one of each item, and no more than five pieces from the collection in total. What do you think? We reckon Lady Gaga has a lot to answer for…

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Style On Trial

Christopher Kane for Topshop – your opinions?


Another week, another designer diffusion line for Topshop…

Most of you weren’t impressed with the Jonathan Saunders line, but what will you make of these pieces by Christopher Kane? Personally, I think these are the kind of clothes I’d really need to see on an actual person to be able to make an informed opinion on, because I suspect that the photography here isn’t doing them too many favours. With that said, I think I just might like the leather bodice dress on the right, although the cut out shirt dress on the left looks straight out of the Little Dress Shop of Horrors, especially for anyone with love handles to hide.

What do you think of these dresses?