Frankenshoes: Casadei fur ankle boots
These boots basically do the Foot Snatcher‘s work for him. And yes, they’re real fur. £650, on sale, here. Tempted?
Frankenshoes: Garth Pugh black satin-covered thigh-high boots
We’re going to assume the boots underneath the satin covers were so ugly they had to cover them up. The thing is, though: when the cover looks this bad, imagine what the boot underneath must look like! [Buy them]
Style Trial: Charlotte Olympia Dolly Rainbow-Feathered Pump
We love parrots, and we love shoes. But what about shoes that look like parrots? Well, first of all we can tell you that no ACTUAL parrots died to make these shoes. The uppers are goose feather (er, we can’t really speak for the geese, [...]
Frankenshoes: Underground x Fleamadonna Faux-Fur Wedges
It’s hard to imagine people looking at the image above and thinking to themselves, “You know, I would totally wear those on my feet!” isn’t it? And yet, some people do, because that’s what they’re for: Still, at least the fur is fake. And they [...]
Style Trial: Camilla Skovgaard hoof-shaped court shoes
One of the most common criticisms we hear about platform shoes is that they can look a bit like hooves, their wearers clip-clopping along like pretty little ponies. In the case of these Camilla Skovgaard pumps, however, the effect is a deliberate one, and the model [...]
Are these the ugliest boots of the year?
We could very well be mistaken. But if there’s an uglier pair of boots out there right now, we don’t want to know about it. Actually, scratch that: we DO want to know about it. Because we’re The Fashion Police: it’s our job to know [...]
Footwear Impostors: Boots pretending to be socks
Because who WOULDN’T instinctively pair black dress heels (with a slightly “granny-ish” edge to them) with thick white cable socks? Oh yeah, that would be most of us. Why did Roccobarocco do it, then? [Buy them]
Style Trial: Giuseppe Zanotti Mixed Media Curved-Wedge Platform Ankle Boots
These exist. Should they exist, though: that is the question we’re here today to ponder. They’re by Giuseppe Zanotti, they’re a whopping £2,070, but despite costing more than a beat-up car, they’re not exactly the most versatile pieces of footwear in the world, consisting of [...]
Crime of Fashion: Crochet platform boots
When we were forced to interview a pair of Christian Louboutin boots last week, on suspicion of committing crimes of fashion, we knew things must be pretty bad in the footwear world. We didn’t realise quite HOW bad things were, however, until we came across these crochet [...]
Style Trial: Nicholas Kirkwood Two Faces Pointed Toe Boots
The Fashion Police have long believed that clothes and shoes shouldn’t have faces. We also firmly believe they shouldn’t have HAIR. Still, we have to admit that the ponytails on these Nicholas Kirkwood boots make us feel a bit nostalgic. It would be a bit [...]
Strange Fruit: Irregular Choice’s Dan Sullivan collection
There are shoes hiding under the fruit and flowers in these photos, we promise: would you want to wear them, though, that’s the question? These are just a small sampling of some of the styles available from Irregular Choice’s Dan Sullivan collection. As many of [...]
Strange Shoes: Upcycled cowboy boots
You know how, when you buy new shoes, they often come wrapped in tissue paper, to protect them from damage inside the box? You all know you’re supposed to remove that tissue paper before you wear them, right? OK. Just checking. These boots are wrapped [...]