| | Category Archives: ShoesFrankenshoes: Brian Atwood ‘Charleston’ & ‘Charlene’ | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
| Tweet | 0 |
When you read the words “silk and satin sandals” in the headline of this post, you probably weren’t expecting THESE, were you? And we don’t know about you, jurors, but if WE were going to be spending £706 on a pair of shoes, we probably wouldn’t want them to look like a cross between a toddler shoe and an old lady shoe. Which these do.
(And yeah, yeah, WE KNOW: they’ll be So! Comfy! Just like Crocs! But honestly, we don’t care about the So! Comfy! because, like Crocs, these are So! Ugly! they almost make our eyes bleed. There are other ways, readers! “Comfortable” doesn’t HAVE to go hand-in-hand with “ugly”: step into the light, and away from the Frankenshoes…)
This does beg an important question, however: why ARE comfortable shoes often ugly? Answers in the comments box…
| Tweet |
Love skyscraper heels? Just can’t wear them without breaking an ankle? Don’t worry, help is at hand – or at foot, rather – in the form of these ‘Big City’ sneakers from BE&D. All the comfort of a sneaker, all the style of a cartoon stiletto: what more could you possibly ask for?
(Well, we guess you could ask for them to cost a bit less than $126, and have magic powers, but you can’t have everything, can you?)
Click here to buy them at Colette.
| Tweet |
There is a saying The Fashion Police love. The saying goes that if you have to say it, you ain’t it. So all those tops with the word “BABE!” on the front (usually in glitter, or pink crystals, or some other such thing)? Are generally a really good sign that the wearer ain’t no babe. Because if you ARE a babe? You don’t NEED to say it.
We have a feeling Christian Louboutin’s ‘Sex’ pumps may fall into this category. See, they’d be sexy WITHOUT the word “SEX” emblazoned on the toe. They’re basically Pigalle pumps, after all, and Pigalles are pretty darn sexy.
Does the text ruin the effect a little, though? Unlike the Louboutin “Love” pumps (Which, unsurprisingly, spelt out “Love” in much the same way), some might argue that it’s just a tad vulgar to walk around with the word SEX on your feet. What do you think? Do these say SEX to you, or do they say, “Hey, we’d look better without this stupid writing on our toes?”
(Click here to buy them at Net-a-Porter)
| Tweet |
Food and feet: now there’s a combination we don’t ever want to think about again!
Oh, sorry, were you eating?
Buy them here for $150.
| Tweet |
Have you ever looked at a pair of Jeffrey Campbell shoes and thought, “Who – other than fashion bloggers, obviously – would wear these? How would they wear them? What would they wear WITH them?” Well, wonder no more, because all of these questions are about to be answered by the brand’s Spring 2012 lookbook. In the case of the shoes above, for instance, we can tell you that they’d be worn with a pair of knickers and a leather jacket, while standing on a box. Well, D’UH, of course they would, stupid!
More shoes and styling suggestions can be found in the gallery below…enjoy!
| Tweet |
Yesterday we showed you an Ugg/Croc/Vibram hybrid – an UggCroc, if you will – which we blithely christened The Ugliest Shoes in the World.
These Zombie sandals beg to differ.
Now all we can think is, “Please don’t let it get any worse than this. We don’t think there’s enough eyeball bleach to go around if it does…”
| Tweet |
This image has popped up in a few places online recently… We’re not sure if these shoes are real: after a bit of work from the Fashion Police detectives, we’re going to go with “probably not”, given that they appear to be some terrible Ugg/Croc/Vibram Five Finger hybrid, but honestly, stranger things have happened in the world of fashion, haven’t they?
If these are real, they’re under arrest. If they’re not… they’re still under arrest, purely for making us even think about what an Ugg/Croc/Vibram crossover might look like.
[Source]
| Tweet |
