Shirts & Tops

Wanted! Navy buton bow top from Dorothy Perkins

Bows are back. The Fashion Police say, “Hallelujah and praise the Gods of Fashion, because we’re all about the bows.” Of course, to be perfectly honest, it’s not like bows have actually been anywhere, but the fashion powers-that-be have decreed them to be officially “back” for Spring, and Dororthy Perkins know it: it was love at first look between us and this navy bow top which is only £15, and will look fabulous in the summer worn with a pair of tailored shorts, or right now with dark denim jeans. It’s cheered us right up, in fact…

Comme des Fashion Criminals do it again

We’re going to be generous here and assume that Comme des Garcons didn’t intend for this top to be worn quite like this. We’re going to assume that because if it IS meant to be worn like this – i.e. with a buck-naked body underneath it – then we’d have to arrest them for crimes of fashion, and that would totally ruin the warm, fuzzy feeling we were left with after reading about little Hayden Panettiere and her whale-saving ways. Then again, the images above do beg the question: if it’s not supposed to be worn like that, then why in the name of Dog has it been photographed like that? Is it just so that Yoox can get a…

The Body Blouse: a crime of fashion, or purely practical?

God, tucking your shirt into your pants is such a pain, isn’t it? Isn’t it a pain? All that billowing fabric having to be stuffed into your jeans, making you feel like you’re wearing a nappy. And you just know it’s all going to come untucked again at some point – probably just after a trip to the bathroom, when your flowing shirt tails will provide a handy visual clue to what exactly you were doing in there – leaving you looking all untucked and untidy. Not a great look, I’m sure you’ll agree. Yes, I can totally see why someone felt the need to invent the Body Blouse – an item of clothing I had previously been blissfully unaware…

Sexy might be the wrong word… (Guest Post by Amy of Talk Fashion to Me)

Amy writes… The store’s description of this knit top includes the phrase, “Be warm, comfy and sexy all at the same time.” And, you know, it’s a nice concept, I guess. Unfortunately, it couldn’t be further from reality. First of all, this top is so flimsy that it’s vaguely skin-toned, even though it’s supposed to be black. Secondly, the model doesn’t look very comfortable—maybe it has something to do with my third point. Thirdly, at what point in the history of the universe has an armpit hole ever qualified as "sexy"? I mean, I doubt that’s what the designers had in mind when they carved out part of the top in an effort to transform it from blah to sexy….

‘Friends Don’t Let Friends Wear Crocs’ and other anti-Croc t-shirts from IhateCrocs.com

Crocs. You hate them, I hate them – everyone I speak to seems to hate them, but still the damn things won’t go away. Now the people who sell them are even employing marketing companies to post fake comments here at The Fashion Police, purporting to be from Croc lovers, so that we’ll all suddenly change our minds and start thinking they’re cool. Here’s the newsflash: Crocs still aren’t cool, and no one knows it better than the good folks over at ihatecrocs.com, who have been doing such sterling work in the war against Crocs. They have burned them. They’ve attacked them with scissors. Even although the Crocs refuse to die – so far – they won’t give up, and…

On Trial: Emily’s camisole – what do you think?

Guest blogger Emily, of Fabulous Fashion Sense wants to know what Fashion Police readers think of this camisole. Emily writes… I have this blog about my opinions and musings on fashion. As you can see, it’s called "Fabulous Fashion Sense". I know it’s such a daring move for me to even consider I have a fabulous fashion sense when the truth is I have a next to no fashion qualifications.  I do have a sister who has a degree in fashion. But I really think I have more fashion sense than her. Ooopss….sorry sis.

Karl Lagerfeld’s ego is getting out of hand…

I know some people will take one look at this and be all "OMG, KARL! It’s KARL LAGERFELD! It’s DESIGNER! And if it’s made by KARL LAGERFELD the DESIGNER then it must totally your world!" But look, the thing is: Karl scares me. It’s something to do with that whole "Prince of Darkness" thing he’s got going on. There are good reasons why The Manolo calls him "the evil one", you know? So, this… This is a shirt with Karl Lagerfeld’s face on it. £70 to walk around with his face on your front.  Do I hear any offers?  (Get it at Net-a-Porter if you must.)

Cheap summer essentials from Delia’s

I love Delia’s. I can’t help it: I know they’re firmly in the "cheap n’ cheerful" category, but trust me, when you get to see the sun as infrequently as I do, you really don’t want to be spending a huge amount of money on summer clothes. So far it’s been raining since forever here in the UK, and we’ve just been told that we can expect the bad weather to last – well, forever, really – so I’ve cheered myself up by doing a virtual shop. Here’s what I’d be buying from Delia’s for summer – if, of course, I could even remember what "summer" was… Product links after the jump.

Crime of Fashion: Bad grammar on slogan t-shirts

Remember that ‘Product of the 80s’ dress‘ Topshop were selling not so long ago? Well, here’s a version from ASOS for those of you who are even younger than the Topshop dress-wearers, and are, in fact, products of the 1990s instead. Have you spotted the deliberate mistake, though? Yes, that would be “product of the 90s” – no apostrophe required. Plurals don’t have apostrophes, kids – don’t listen to ASOS and Topshop, listen to The Fashion Police. We’ll keep you right. Or we’ll try, anyway. More crimes of fashion