Shirts & Tops

      full-time-fashion-blogger

      Full time fashion blogger? Here’s a sweatshirt just for you…

      ‘Full Time Fashion Blogger’ sweatshirt, £25 at River Island Are there seriously so many full time fashion bloggers out there that there’s a need for dedicated clothing, just for them? Apparently so: or maybe River Island just think there are enough people who WANT to be full-time fashion bloggers for…

      invisible-top

      The Emperor’s New Tops by Topshop Boutique

      [All items: Topshop] “Hmmm,” we thought, “Those are some cute sweatshirts. Bit pricey at £50 each, mind you, but still: unusual colours, inoffensive enough shapes…. Nope, no crime being committed here, that’s for sure!” Then we clicked on to the model images, and… Oh. It’s like that, is it. The…

      Closet Heroes: The Breton Top

      A closet hero is an item of clothing which, once purchased, quickly becomes indispensable to its owner. Here at TFP, we don’t believe that there are particular items which “every woman” should own: we’re all too different to need or want exactly the same clothes. We do, however, believe that most people…

      strange, unusual and ugly shirts

      Ugly shirts arrested by Fashion Police

      Late last night  Fashion Police officers, acting on an anonymous tip-off, conducted a raid on a website believed to be harbouring a secret crime ring of ugly shirts. It started off innocently enough: Well, OK, maybe “innocent” is the wrong word here. It’s also possible this just looks innocent to…

      cropped tops

      Style Trial: Cropped tops

      Cropped tops: they let you crop it like it’s hot. Apparently. (Get this one at ASOS) Who loves cropped tops? Judging by the responses we’ve had when we’ve asked this question in the past, the answer to that question would be NO ONE. NO ONE loves cropped tops: or not…

      ugly shirts and tops

      The Ugliest Tops of 2012

      So far in our 2012 crime retrospective, we’ve shown you the ugliest dresses and the scariest skirts. The dresses can stand alone, but you’re probably wondering what on earth you’d wear WITH all those ugly skirts, huh? Well, wonder no more: here are some of the ugliest shirts and tops…

      sheer ruffled blouse

      Ruffles Gone Wrong

      In calling this crime “Ruffles Gone Wrong” we feel we really have to address the fact that they rarely ever go RIGHT, do they? We don’t often meet a ruffle we don’t hate, and this is no exception, mostly because it looks like the result of a bad accident in…

      hard edges fringe top

      Crime of Fashion? Hard Edges Fringe Top

      Well, it looks like a lot of fun, we’ll give it that. It.. doesn’t look much like a TOP, though, does it? Which is an issue. We’ve always believed that if an item of clothing doesn’t instantly LOOK like an item of clothing, and if it doesn’t fulfil any of the functions…