Shirts & Tops

      5 tops to wear with leggings

      5 Tops to Wear With Leggings

      When we talked about what to wear with leggings, we mentioned that the number one rule to bear in mind is that whatever you wear, it ideally has to cover your crotch.  Sounds simple enough, right? Well, yes, it does: but sometimes the simplest items of clothing can be the hardest to find, so, with that in mind, we’ve sent our officers out to comb the world of fashion and identify some tops to wear with leggings, to keep you on the straight and narrow… 01. Topshop neat-fit chambray shirt Longline shirts are always great tops to wear with leggings, and the humble chambray is something of a modern classic. Topshop’s neat fit chambray isn’t too baggy, but is cut…

      not a fashion victim

      This is not a fashion victim

      Not a fashion victim? Time to prove it… Here at The Fashion Police, it’s our job to identify and arrest fashion victims (and then to help them to rehabilitate, obviously: you CAN overcome crimes of fashion, people – it just takes a little bit of time, and a complete change of mindset…), so it’s helpful when people who AREN’T fashion victims make themselves known – which they can now do with the help of this French Connection t-shirt. Of course, SOME people might argue that paying £30 for a t-shirt is the very definition of being a fashion victim, but we’re going to leave that up to you to decide. In the meantime, here are some articles to help you…

      neon shirt dress

      Shirt Story

      Shirts. We don’t find ourselves arresting them too often here, because, well, they’re shirts. Seriously, how badly wrong can you go with a classic button-down shirt? Well, we’ll tell you. THIS is how badly wrong you can go: [Buy it here] It’s Moschino. Obviously. Well, it’s not like many other brands would pull a stunt like this, is it? They’ll tell you they’re making a little joke, like, “this is how we made your shirt”, but, as always with Moschino, the real joke is on you, because you just paid £680 for something that looks like the pattern for a shirt rather than the shirt itself. If you’ll buy that, however, you’ll probably buy anything, so how about this one:…

      stuck-together-clothes

      Topshop in blatant ‘Stuck Together Clothes’ crime

      Stuck-Together-Clothes: no matter how hard we fight the good fight against them, still brands keep trying to sell us them. Take this, for instance: Two-n-One Bralet tee, £24 We’ll start by stating the obvious: if you REALLY want to wear a bra over the top of your t-shirt, just do it. By which we mean, take a bra, take a t-shirt, wear one of them over the other: done. You don’t actually NEED a special “bralet tee” to achieve this look, do you? And yet somehow Topshop thinks you do. They think you wouldn’t be capable of putting this, er, “look”, together on your own, so they’ve helpfully done it for you. And you will pay them for this. Actually,…

      full-time-fashion-blogger

      Full time fashion blogger? Here’s a sweatshirt just for you…

      ‘Full Time Fashion Blogger’ sweatshirt, £25 at River Island Are there seriously so many full time fashion bloggers out there that there’s a need for dedicated clothing, just for them? Apparently so: or maybe River Island just think there are enough people who WANT to be full-time fashion bloggers for this sweatshirt to be funny/ironic/whatever. There’s no doubt in our minds that, despite repeated rumours of the “death” of blogging, more people than ever are jumping on board the fashion blog bandwagon these days: we suspect recent articles suggesting that top fashion bloggers are making millions of dollars from their blogs have a lot to do with that. If, however, you’re not impressed with the increasing number of fashion-blogger-wannabes, don’t worry,…

      invisible-top

      The Emperor’s New Tops by Topshop Boutique

      [All items: Topshop] “Hmmm,” we thought, “Those are some cute sweatshirts. Bit pricey at £50 each, mind you, but still: unusual colours, inoffensive enough shapes…. Nope, no crime being committed here, that’s for sure!” Then we clicked on to the model images, and… Oh. It’s like that, is it. The visible labels are the best, aren’t they? They really make the outfit, you know? So edgy! Now, we hate to point out the glaringly obvious here, and we do realise that these are (probably) intended to be layered over other items, but even so, there’s just no getting away from the fact that these garments are almost invisible to the naked eye. They’re just one small step away from wearing…

      Closet Heroes: The Breton Top

      A closet hero is an item of clothing which, once purchased, quickly becomes indispensable to its owner. Here at TFP, we don’t believe that there are particular items which “every woman” should own: we’re all too different to need or want exactly the same clothes. We do, however, believe that most people have their own closet heroes, and in this regular column, we’ll be sharing some of ours: and hopefully some of yours, too. Today it’s the turn of… The Breton Top: a closet hero? Hello, I’m Amber, a.k.a the Chief of Police, and I’m addicted to Breton tops. Or ANY kind of striped top, really. Of course, as with all of the items featured in this series, I realise it’s all…

      Dorothy Perkins laser cut flowers top

      High Street Hero: Dorothy Perkins laser cut flowers top

      Dorothy Perkins laser cut flowers top, £32 An intricate, laser cut top isn’t something you generally find in the £30-or-thereabouts price bracket, so when we saw this one at Dorothy Perkins, we decided to nominate it as a High Street Hero. What’s a High Street Hero? It’s one of those items you find on the high street (Well, d’uh), which stand out from the crowd for one reason or another: either they look more expensive than they are, they’re the kind of quality you don’t always find from the price…or you just really like the look of them. This top falls into the third category for us. We haven’t seen it in the “flesh”, so we can’t speak to the…

      strange, unusual and ugly shirts

      Ugly shirts arrested by Fashion Police

      Late last night  Fashion Police officers, acting on an anonymous tip-off, conducted a raid on a website believed to be harbouring a secret crime ring of ugly shirts. It started off innocently enough: Well, OK, maybe “innocent” is the wrong word here. It’s also possible this just looks innocent to us NOW, in light of what came afterwards. Because let’s face it: this shirt looks like it lost its own arms in some horrible accident (perhaps the blue heart killed them?), and had to have them replaced with these bad prosthetics. It’s nothing, however, compared to this: We don’t know about you, but this is one take on the monochrome trend we WON’T be adopting this season. Or not unless…

      cropped tops

      Style Trial: Cropped tops

      Cropped tops: they let you crop it like it’s hot. Apparently. (Get this one at ASOS) Who loves cropped tops? Judging by the responses we’ve had when we’ve asked this question in the past, the answer to that question would be NO ONE. NO ONE loves cropped tops: or not anyone we’ve met, anyway. Someone out there must absolutely love them, though, because, once again, our officers have noticed a dramatic upswing in crop top sightings: in fact, we’re starting to think we might need some kind of special ops task force in order to deal with it. Cropped tops, of course, are one of those things that come in and out of fashion fairly often: about as often as…

      Kate Middleton portrait

      Kate Middleton portrait helps sell French Connection tops

        Let’s talk about that Kate Middleton portrait for a second, shall we? Now, we don’t advocate body/face snarking. At all. In fact, we find it totally depressing when we ask the ladies and gentlemen of the Fashion Police Jury what they think of a celebrity outfit, and get a bunch of comments on their face/figure/how old they look, etc, etc. These are things the celebrities (mostly) can’t do much about, you see, and as for the “OMG SHE LOOKS SO OLD!” comments, well, people get old. It happens. It’ll even happen to you one day, if you’re lucky. In this case, though, we feel no compunction about commenting on Kate Middleton’s face because, well, THAT ISN’T KATE MIDDLETON’S FACE,…

      ugly shirts and tops

      The Ugliest Tops of 2012

      So far in our 2012 crime retrospective, we’ve shown you the ugliest dresses and the scariest skirts. The dresses can stand alone, but you’re probably wondering what on earth you’d wear WITH all those ugly skirts, huh? Well, wonder no more: here are some of the ugliest shirts and tops of 2012 (in our opinion at least): you’ll find our original posts about them here.

      fringed bolero jacket

      Clothes Ripper targets If Six Was Nine bolero jacket

      Oh dear. If any of you ever doubted how dangerous the fashion criminal known only as The Clothes Ripper is, this should offer all the proof you need. This item, you see, used to be a bolero jacket. That would’ve been bad enough on its own, but a quick visit from The Clothes Ripper and now it just looks like it’s vomiting fabric into the lap of anyone who wears it: It’s a sad, sad world when people will do things like this to innocent clothes. Remember to call The Fashion Police if you witness a crime like this one! [Buy it]

      sheer ruffled blouse

      Ruffles Gone Wrong

      In calling this crime “Ruffles Gone Wrong” we feel we really have to address the fact that they rarely ever go RIGHT, do they? We don’t often meet a ruffle we don’t hate, and this is no exception, mostly because it looks like the result of a bad accident in a Victorian lampshade factory. Could it ever be redeemed? Is there a way to wear it without looking like Lord Byron’s less-stylish sidekick? We honestly doubt it, but we’d love to see you try. In the meantime, we think we might just go ahead and add ruffles to our list of “Things That Almost Always Create a Fashion Crime”. We’re just amazed the model wasn’t also wearing peep toe boots! Oh…

      hard edges fringe top

      Crime of Fashion? Hard Edges Fringe Top

      Well, it looks like a lot of fun, we’ll give it that. It.. doesn’t look much like a TOP, though, does it? Which is an issue. We’ve always believed that if an item of clothing doesn’t instantly LOOK like an item of clothing, and if it doesn’t fulfil any of the functions normally associated with items of clothing (Keeping you warm, covering your naked body, that kind of boring, old-fashioned stuff…) there’s a good chance we’re dealing with a crime of fashion. In this case? We think there’s a pretty good chance we’re dealing with a crime of fashion here. Just in case you’re in any doubt about this, we present this important piece of evidence, in the form of the product…

      ASOS penis blouse

      ASOS “penis blouse” is a big hit on Facebook, Twitter

      Some of you may be seeing a perfectly innocent grey blouse here, with a charming coral trim. Others, however, are seeing something a little less sweet and innocent: this blouse has been christened the “penis blouse” (or other, slightly more crude variations) by people on Twitter and Facebook today, and we’ve seen it so many times now we figured it was time we stepped in and arrested it. So, in the words of Rolf Harris: can yer see what it is yet? [Buy it here for £30]

      Viktor & Rolf shirt

      What big shoulders you have, fashion criminals…

      This shirt will cost you £450. That’s the bad news. The good news is that if giant beetles ever rise up and take over the planet, you’ll be able to throw in this shirt, and try to pass yourself off as a human/beetle hybrid. In this way you’ll be able to live among our insect overlords in relative peace. Until one day they recognise you as the impostor you are, and eat you, obviously. Actually, that might have been the bad news? The idea of people paying THAT MUCH for THIS has clearly disturbed us, and we need to go and lie down. Still, we hear that big shoulders are going to be, like, SO HOT this season. That has…

      comme des garcons top

      Crime of Fashion? Comme des Garcons cloud-shaped top

      We know what you’re thinking. It’s kinda cool on the mannequin, it’s creative, it’s different, it’s “edgy”… maybe it looks better on a person? Well, let’s see, shall we? Yeah. Well, rather you than us, we guess. Especially considering that this top costs $794, and looks like something a cartoon character would turn his nose up at. Edgy, though. Definitely edgy… [Buy it]

      Nasty Gal Totally Exposed Blouse

      The Emperor’s New Shirt

      Nasty Gal describe this item as a “totally exposed blouse“. Which isn’t strictly accurate, really: it’s not the BLOUSE that’s “totally exposed”, after all: it’s whatever lies under the blouse – bra, leather bustier, nothing… Let’s be honest, though: when you looked at this photo, you didn’t actually notice the blouse at first, did you? You were probably distracted by the aforementioned leather bustier, or the “classy” suspenders dangling from the cutoffs. So, the question is: if a blouse falls onto a model, but no one can actually see it, is it a crime of fashion? We’re going to go with “yes”. If you’re going with “no”, you can either pay $48 for this one, or, alternatively, just don’t bother wearing…

      Maison Martin Margiela sleeveless t-shirt

      Straight-jacket style, with Maison Martin Margiela

      “Sleeveless t-shirt” is how Yoox.com describes these garments. They’re wrong, though. They’re not REALLY sleeveless. Oh no, these have sleeves all right. It’s just… they’re attached to the sides on the shirts. So, if you decided to wear one of these, your choice would be to either: a) Walk around with your arms plastered to your sides, straight-jacket style. or b) Free your arms, but have to walk around with those sleeves flapping against them all the time. Getting dressed has never been so tricky, has it? Leave it to Maison Martin Margiela to take the basic t-shirt and make it “edgy”. And leave it to MMM, too, to take something that should be comfortable and easy, and turn it into the…

      fur t-shirt

      Furry Fashion from Omer Asim

      Now THAT is what you call a hairy chest, readers. And also a hairy back. We’re impressed. Before we rush out and spend £552 on this, though, we wonder: what on earth would we wear with our brand new fur t-shirt? We could wear it like this, obviously: That could work. It’s just, you know, it’s not quite edgy enough, is it? So we think we’d probably wear it with this: NOW we have an outfit. And we’ll get bonus fashionista points for the presence of the sheer panel on the skirt, too! Note that the peep toe boot rule is in full effect here: not, of course, that we’d have needed to consult it in this particular case… [Product Page]

      sporty fashion

      Sporty Style: Running vests now the height of fashion

      She’s never going to win the 500 metres in those shoes, is she? We know sportswear is probably going to be big this summer – or bigger than usual, anyway – thanks to the Olympics, but would you pay £45 for a sheer green sports vest? And if you did, would you wear it with short-shorts and heels? Click here to buy it if you answered in the affirmative…

      ugly fashion

      Let it all hang out

      And to think we were worried about people wearing leggings as pants. This is a Fashion Police emergency, everyone. Please do not try to approach these items of clothing: we have reason to believe they could be dangerous… [Bernhard Willhelm top and shorts: click here to buy them at Far Fetch.]

      Graeme Armour sheer t-shirt

      This sheer shirt is not at all impractical

      The pocket makes this totally practical, doesn’t it? Without it, we’d have had to arrest this Graeme Armour t-shirt for being the type of “Emperor’s New Clothes” item that fashion victims will pay $230 for, just because “IT’S DESIGNER!”. But the pocket changes everything. Now all we can ask ourselves is who WOULDN’T pay $230 for this? Seriously, WHO? [Product Page]

      Reverse Mullet Shirt by Maison Martin Margiela

      Introducing The Reverse Mullet Shirt

      We’re sure there’s a reason why this shirt exists. We’re sure there must be occasions for which the most appropriate of all clothing options is a shirt which is almost ankle-length at the front (and on a 5’9″ model, which means it would be pretty much floor-length on The Fashion Police), and almost non-existent at the back. We’re also sure there must be a reason why it’s $295. We’re just not sure what any of those reasons are yet. Do YOU know? This is by MM6 Maison Martin Margiela. Click here to buy it at Shopbop.

      Aqua shoulder pad body suit

      Style Trial: Aqua ‘Plato’ Shoulder Padded Bodysuit

      This model is totally pretending to be a superhero, isn’t she? And let’s be honest: YOU’D pretend to be a superhero too, if you had a padded (body)suit like this, wouldn’t you? It would be hard to resist. You could be Fashion Criminal Girl. Or FashionistaWoman, maybe, depending on your point of view. What IS your point of view, though? Is this bodysuit almost comically absurd, or is it the cutting edge of fashion, and totally wearable with the right outfit/attitude? Cast your votes now: Guilty or Innocent?

      The most expensive t-shirt in the world

      This is the most expensive t-shirt in the world

      It’s $400,000. FOUR. HUNDRED. THOUSAND. DOLLARS. Here is why it costs so much: The spherical pattern is illustriously decorated with 16 certified hand-set diamonds. Each diamond commands exquisite color, clarity, cut and luster. Every diamond is an example of natural beauty as nothing is more rare, precious, beautiful or indestructible as a diamond! The design is encrusted with 8 white diamonds each over 1ct and 8 ‘enhanced’ rare black diamonds also over 1ct each. And where would one buy the most expensive t-shirt in the world, we totally don’t hear you ask? Why, at themostexpensivetshirtintheworld.com. OBVIOUSLY. [Source]  

      White t-shirt with fur patches

      Monthly Margiela: The Hair Shirt

      If you’re a regular reader, you’ll know that not a month goes by without us having to take the folks at Maison Martin Margiela to task for some hideous Crime of Fashion or other. Margiela himself doesn’t design for the brand any more, but his influence lives on, and we view him as a kind of Evil Overlord of the fashion world: kind of like the Joker, only with weirder outfits. Anyway, so great is MMM’c occupancy of our cells that we decided to give the brand a monthly slot here. And what do they have in store for us this month, we hear you ask? Oh, just this: OH GOD. It’s no use, we were trying to be blasé about it,…

      Tops with attached bag by Comme des Garcons

      The Bag Lady Look, from Comme des Garcons

      For as long as we’ve been arresting Stuck Together Clothes, we’ve also been wondering what depths the designers of such items will be willing to sink too. So far, we’ve seen socks attached to shoes, shirts attached to jeans, underpants attached to sweatpants… there is no item of clothing, it would seem, which cannot be attached to something else. What’s the strangest example of Stuck Together Clothing, though? Well, we thing this t-shirt with attached bag – yes, BAG – has to be somewhere near the top of the list. This is actually a three-way attachment, and possibly a four-way one. There’s a cardigan attached to the t-shirt, which is attached to the bag, which may or may not be attached…

      Model in pyjama top

      Pyjamas in Public: now the height of fashion!

      Good news for those of you who like to wear your pyjamas in public, but are tired of being kicked out of supermarkets or told you’re not not respectably dressed: this Rag & Bone blouse gives you all the, er, style, of a PJ top, but costs $325, and is sold as daywear. So next time the security guard tries to escort you out of the supermarket, you can just toss your hair, stick your nose in the air, and utter the fashion victim‘s battle cry: “But it’s DESIGNER!” Not even Shopbop are trying to pretend this looks like anything other than a pyjama top: it’s described on the website as a “PJ blouse”, which is a fair description, given…

      massive shoulderpads

      Shoulder pads go wild

      Is it a sweater, or is it a giant Mickey Mouse head? We just don’t know. What we DO know is that the brand is called Moonspoon Saloon and the top is called ‘Backstage Elephant”, so we give them credit for creative naming at least. We’re still arresting the shoulders, though… (Click here to buy it)

      Sauce pineapple tank top

      Hey, Pineapple boobs!

      Do you really want to walk around with pineapples instead of boobs?  And saggy pineapple boobs at that?  Really?  Apparently the pineapples are glittery too.  We don’t think that helps matters. If you disagree, and think that fruit is the next big thing in chest-wear, this is by Sauce, and you can buy it for $62 at Shopbop.

      balmain t-shirt with safety pins

      Daylight Robbery? Balmain cotton t-shirt with safety pins

      Folks, do us a favour: read the title of this post again. Then explain to us why this cotton t-shirt is worth $1,500. WITHOUT using any variation on the phrase “Because IT’S OMGDESIGNER!” We’ll wait here while you come up with something. (Want it? Click here to buy it.)

      don't judge a girl by her clothes

      Moschino have a message for you…

      The Fashion Police approve this message. The Fashion Police also LOL’d long and hard at the irony of THIS message being delivered through the medium of a $376 dollar tank top from a designer clothing label. If you just want to buy it, however, go ahead and click here. We promise not to judge you by your clothes.* (*OK, maybe just a little bit.)

      Barbour quilted shirt jacket

      Fashion Police for the Boys: Barbour quilted shirt jacket

      This article of clothing is confused.  It doesn’t know whether it’s a shirt or a jacket.  Neither do we, come to that.  The quilting would suggest it’s a jacket, but the slim cut makes it a shirt.  Oh, now our heads hurt.  Whilst we go and lie down for a while, tell us what you think of this.  Is it a shirt or a jacket?  Gentlemen readers: would you wear it?  Ladies: would you want your fella to wear it? If you want to buy it, it’s £90 at ASOS.

      Starstyling holograph leggings

      Daylight Robbery? Starstyling holograph leggings

      Is everyone else seeing a pair of fishnet tights with a few sequins stuck to them?  Good, so are we.  Topshop however, see £145 of leggings.  That’s right folks, £145!  And they’re calling them “leggings”.  Now repeat after us: leggings are not pants.  Fishnet anything are not leggings. But wait!  It gets worse!

      ugly-lettuce-shirt

      Spot the Difference, with Maison Martin Margiela

      It may look like your little brother’s crappy home-made Halloween costume, but do not be fooled, readers: the item on the left of the image (you know, the one that just burned out your retinas?) is, in fact, a $316 shirt by Maison Martin Margiela. OK, House of Margiela, YOU WIN. You are too powerful for us. There is no stopping you in your dastardly plot to take over the world with your increasingly bizarre fashion. Instead, we bow down before you. Let us all dress as vegetables from this moment on!* Click here to buy it. (The shirt, that is, not the lettuce. Although, come to think of it, the lettuce will be cheaper, and will look much the…

      Topshop Premium chain detail sweater

      Holey Clothes: Topshop Premium chain detail sweater

      If you like your clothes with holes (well someone must, the stores keep on producing them after all!) then how do you feel about them having chains around the holes?  It’s a new twist on the style, but it doesn’t do anything to detract from the fact that your new sweater is full of (quite large in this case) holes, and is not going to keep you very warm.  Which is rather the point of wearing a sweater, isn’t it? If you like this sweatshirt style top, and you don’t mind the draught from the holes (there’s only size S/M left so someone must be buying them), it is now reduced to £20 (from £42) in the Topshop sale.

      top with cape

      Fashion Crime? Michael Van Der Ham silk top with partial cape

      “Silk top with partial cape.” As soon as we read the second part of that sentence, we knew we were dealing with a potential fashion infringer. Seriously, if it had been a FULL cape, that would’ve been one thing. Maybe not a great thing, admittedly, but at least it would’ve been a whole top, with a whole cape. This, on the other hand… well, at first glance we didn’t have a clue which part of the body this was supposed to adorn, and that’s always a bad sign, isn’t it? As we’ve always said, if we can’t even work out what it is, we’re probably going to arrest it, just to be on the safe side. The model shot helps…

      Lanvin silk halterneck top

      Bag Lady Chic: Bag top by Lanvin

      You could be forgiven for thinking that this is a drawstring bag.  We thought it was a bag when we first saw it.  But we promise you that this is, in fact, a halterneck top.  Pretending to be a drawstring bag.  (No, it’s not really, it’s just doing a jolly good impression of a drawstring bag.)  If you visit the Matches website you will see it being worn.  And on a mannequin?  It still looks like a drawstring bag if we’re honest. What do you think though?  Can you forgive the bag imposter tendencies because of that lovely bright yellow, which we actually quite like?  Or does it just look like a bag to you too?  If you want to…

      viktor-and-rolf-shirtdress

      Style on Trial: Viktor & Rolf off-shoulder shirt dress

      Behold, the humble shirt dress! It’s always been one of the fashion world’s more casual accouterments, but this one by Viktor & Rolf really takes “casual” to the limits, because rather than going for the “Oh, hey, I just rolled out of bed and threw on my boyfriend’s shirt, aren’t I adorable?” look, it’s proceeded straight to, “I borrowed it from a lopsided giant, it doesn’t fit me AT ALL, and I feel a bit like the madwoman in the attic in it, but I’m just going to wear it anyway, because I am seriously THAT COOL.” Or something like that, anyway. (Don’t you just love the model’s expression in the photo on the far right? She’s all, “WHUT? Yoos never…

      Karen Millen denim effect t shirt

      The “effect” effect: Karen Millen’s denim effect t-shirt

      That’s right boys and girls, this is not just a denim jacket over a t-shirt – oh no. It is a bona fide cotton t-shirt with “denim effect”! It’s true, we tell you: this is simply a plain white t-shirt with a denim jacket printed on it! You’d never believe it, eh?! What exactly is with the “effect” effect? Why make something denim effect when it would be so much easier, not to mention more profitable, to just sell a plain white t-shirt independently to a cropped, short-sleeved denim jacket? I mean, here in Britain, at least, we could use the layers… Denim effect t-shirt: £65 from Karen Millen.

      alexander wang shirt

      The Caped Crusader: Alexander Wang re-invents the shirt. Again.

      Ever since she was a little girl, she’d dreamt of being a superhero. Now, with the help of her trusty Alexander Wang shirt, she got to feel like one every single day: And every time the wind blew, why, she felt like she could fly! It totally justified the $325 she paid for it. (Er, we kinda want one of these too, now. Doesn’t everyone secretly want to be a caped crusader?) Click here to buy it.

      River Island lets ride top

      Illiteracy at River Island: Lets ride low slung skull vest

      Our computer just underlined part of that title in green, and rightly so.  It never ceases to amaze us how tops such as this can get through the design process without anyone noticing that it is missing an apostrophe.  River Island, you may well “love this” but you can’t spell, can you? You can probably tell that we don’t “love this” but do you?  If you must buy this (and you want look like you can’t spell either), then it is £19.99 here.  (Better buy yourself a fabric pen too, so you can correct the error.)

      Evil Twin mesh tunic

      Holey Clothes: Evil Twin mesh tunic

      For some reason the trend for clothes with holes in continues apace.  When the item is question is made out of mesh though, it just looks as though the top has lost a fight with the washing machine and is now falling apart.  The poor model doesn’t look very happy either, does she? “You want me to model this for sale?” she’s saying.  “But I thought that was the damaged stock rail.” What do you think though?  Do you like the ready made holes or do you prefer your mesh garments to only have the holes that mesh is supposed to have?  If you like it and want to buy it, it is $118 at Shopbop.

      shirt with attached raincoat

      STCC*: SACAI waterproof waistcoat and shirt

      Well, it seems last week’s jacket with attached rain cape wasn’t an isolated incident, and here’s Sacai’ shirt-with-attached-waterproof waistcoat to prove it. A few points about this: 1. A waterproof waistcoat? Really? What’s the point? Is there a reason you’d want to keep your shoulders and the centre of your torso dry, and think, “Screw the rest! If my collar, sleeves and the whole rest of my shirt get soaked, WHO CARES? At least my shoulders will be warm!” 2. When it’s not raining? Too bad: your “rain(waist)coat” is stuck to your shirt. Have a nice day! 3. It costs £564 to look this stupid. 4. And that’s the sale price. It used to cost twice that. If you happen to…

      It wasn't me, it was my Evil Twin

      Evil Twin Cage Knit Crop Top: appropriately named

      First we had the Guilty Brotherhood, now here’s the Evil Twin: hey, imagine what it would be like if they joined forces! We must say, though, we’re impressed that some fashion brands are starting to recognise the depth of their crimes and label themselves accordingly: acceptance is the first step towards becoming a reformed fashion criminal, after all. As for the crop “top”, well, what is there to say other than a) it’s not much of a “top”, and b) yeah. Still, this kind of thing is wildly popular in fashionable circles right now: in fact, we can’t seem to find a personal style blog that doesn’t feature someone wearing a harness of some kind, so more power to them….