Adult Onesie, Crimes of Fashion

ONEPIECE: New evidence of the Dress Like a Toddler Trend

Look at these people, readers. They’re wearing a ONEPIECE. It’s the hot new trend sweeping the nation. Yes, we checked our calendars too, to make sure it wasn’t April the 1st already…

We don’t normally reproduce press releases here, but we’re going to make an exception for this one. This is what the makers of Onepiece have to say about it (our bold, for emphasis):

: Starting in 2007, three hung-over Norwegians (Thomas Adams, Henrik Nøstrud and Knut Gresvig) had the idea to sew together a hooded sweatshirt and a pair of sweatpants [OMGSTUCKTOGETHERCLOTHES! -FP], connecting the two with a giant zipper to create the ORIGINAL OnePiece. An instant success amongst Norwegians, OnePiece was introduced to the British market to a massive, indescribable frenzy [And yet you just described it. Huh. – FP]London’s Evening Standard broke the story as, “THE Winter Trend Of 2010,” The Guardian devoted a three-page cover feature on it, Sky News made it a rotating weekend feature and it became the most discussed ‘news item’ on The Daily Mail website [This isn’t surprising, actually. The Daily Fail readers get excited about anything – FP.]. With various patterns/colors to choose from (including the standard Nordic snowflake-style motif), made of high-quality, fleecy cotton with a zip that starts at the crotch and goes up to the top, OnePiece is rapidly becoming the new fashion and lifestyle statement. OnePiece is the perfect chill-out, recovery wear for lazy Sundays, it can also be worn outdoors  [Only if you want us to arrest you…FP] for a quick shopping trip/running errands, as well as a suitable and comfy in-flight clothing option (airports have never looked so colorful).

This is the shape of the future, readers. People are absolutely hellbent on trying to convince each other that they’re making a “style statement!” by wearing adult onesies in public. The Cult of the Casual has taken over to such an extent that the appearance of a new ADULT ONESIE on the market can spark a “frenzy”. In other news: there is no God.

Oh, and did we mention they’re $200?

Click here for the Onepiece website. It’ll make you feel like this, apparently:

But it made US feel like THIS:

How does it make YOU feel?

Previous Post Next Post

You Might Also Like