Modelling Is Hard: ‘Dress Monster’ Chambray Denim Jumpsuit

“Dear Diary,

No one told me modelling would be like this. When I became a model, I thought it would be glamorous. I thought I’d be meeting beautiful people and wearing beautiful clothes, and now look at me! I’m dressed like an inmate from the Fashion Police jail! Or a lunatic asylum.”

baggy denim jumpsuit from ASOS

“And I look fat, don’t I? Or do I just look like a Teletubby? Or a toddler? The photographer keeps calling me Tinky-Winky, so maybe that’s it. And I’m like, ‘OK, let’s see YOU try to smile when you’re dressed like this, hey?’ Also, they made me wear peep-toe boots. With ankle socks. Because, like, I didn’t look bad enough before, obviously.”

peep toe boots with ankle socks

“SERIOUSLY.”

sad jumpsuit model

“I WANT TO DIE, YOU GUYS!”

“Oh, you think it’s funny, do you? That’s it, I’m turning my back.”

saggy denim jumpsuit

“I’m also firing my agent.”

“Oh, and just in case this wasn’t enough of an embarrassment, they also filmed me walking down the catwalk in this thing. I DID NOT SMILE. I refused to smile. Instead, I used my facial expression to convey exactly how I feel about this “outfit”. I should TOTALLY be an actress, you guys, I’m not joking…”

(Don’t worry, folks, this model has been taken to a Fashion Police safe-house, where she’s recovering from her ordeal. Our thanks go to Fashion Police reader Sara for alerting us to this flagrant abuse of an innocent model.)

[Product Page]

6 Comments

  • July 14, 2010

    lizvocal

    “I only eat three stalks of celery a day to dress like this? Bring on the bacon…”

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  • July 15, 2010

    Rock Hyrax

    lol!
    Sort of comforting to see they’re adhering to the PTB rule…

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    • July 16, 2010

      Keeva

      what is the PTB rule?

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      • July 16, 2010

        The Fashion Police

        The Peep Toe Boot Rule : it states that every time a model is spotted wearing an ugly item of clothing, she’s almost always ALSO wearing peep toe boots 🙂

        Longer explanation here: http://www.thefashionpolice.net/2010/02/diesel-balloon-jeans-why.html

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  • July 27, 2010

    Kiri

    Poor poor girl. Couldn’t they at least belt the thing? It might have made it look somewhat better. . .

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  • August 30, 2010

    red

    That was funny and you are a good sport! But I’ve got to tell you that any outfit with rolled up pantlegs and socks is hot hot hot! I wish I was sitting at that runway with your bare legs at eye level!!!

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