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Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Forget frayed jeans: feathers are where it’s at now

feathered jeans by Michael Kors collection

Feathered jeans by Michael Kors collection

For a long time now, fashion designers have been having a real problem with jeans, the problem being this: how to mess them up?

The thing is, for most people, jeans are a wardrobe staple. They’re classics. They’re worn by everyone, from the super-fashionable, to the not-even-remotely-fashionable – and everyone in between, too. Now, the problem for Fashion People (Who deserve to have their name written in caps, because they’re not like Other People, obviously), is that they don’t want to look like the not-even-remotely-fashionable people. Hell, they don’t even want to look like the somewhere-in-between people, either: which can be somewhat tricky when you’re wearing jeans – the uniform of Almost Everybody. Fashion People, after all, wouldn’t ever want to be accused of just wearing “jeans and a nice top”, for instance: so what are the poor things to do?

Of course, there are plenty of ways to wear jeans without looking – gasp! – ordinary, and a lot of it comes down to the type of jeans you’re wearing, as opposed to what you wear WITH THEM. (A nice top is a big no-no, though, just so you know…) What some fashion designers decide to do, however, is to shun the “classic” jean altogether, and create something new, and totally different.

Enter the feathered leg jean.

These jeans come at the end of a year in which fashion designers have found it impossible to stop messing with the hems of their jeans. First came the “raw” or let-down hem look, which is basically how your jeans would look if you simply took a pair of scissors and chopped off the hems. (You’ll have to pay way more for this if you let a fashion designer do it for you, though, obviously…) Then came the fringed hem, which is exactly what it sounds like, and looks a bit like you attached a small rug to your hems.

Now we have feathers: and not just on the hems, but all the way up the legs, too.

Where will it end, this constant push to redesign the wheel – we mean the jeans? We’ve no idea: but our officers will keep you posted…

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

The New Way to Wear Denim

It looks like denim’s gotten out of control again, fashion force. As if all of those bizarre-looking frayed-hem jeans weren’t bad enough, now our officers also have things like this to content with:

R13 layered distressed jeans

These sold out at Net-a-Porter within a few days, despite the fact that:

a) They cost £630


b) They’re a skirt attached to a pair of jeans.

Let’s think about that last point for a minute, shall we? Imagine, if you will, getting dressed in the morning. You pull on your favourite pair of jeans, and add a pair of beat-up white sneakers to wear with them. So far, so good. Basic, but good. Then you look in the mirror. “There’s just something missing here,” you find yourself thinking: so you go to your closet, have a quick rummage, and finally pull out a denim mini skirt, which you put on OVER the top of the jeans. “NOW I’m ready!” you declare triumphantly: except, you don’t, do you? Because, unless you’re the kind of person who prides yourself on wearing strange and possibly uncomfortable clothes (Because, seriously: there’s nothing about denim-skirt-over-denim-jeans that sounds remotely comfortable, is there?), there’s no part of this scenario that makes sense. Not even if it was a NICE pair of jeans, and a NICE denim skirt.

We’re NOT going to be signing up to be alerted when these are back in stock, in other words. And we’re probably not going to rushing out to buy these ones, either:

turn up culottesOn the plus side, at least you wouldn’t have to carry a handbag with these: you could probably fit just about everything you’d need inside those massive turn-ups, huh? On the minus side, however… well, the mugshot pretty much speaks for itself here, doesn’t it? If you have $270 burning a hole in your pocket, and a hankering for a big ol’ hemline, however, you know exactly what to do…

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

This is why we prefer dresses.

As our officers parade the mean streets of the Internet’s retail sites, in search of fashion crimes to arrest, there are some types of clothing which are more likely than others to set our radar pinging. We could trawl dress or outerwear sections all day, for instance, and rarely see anything too unusual. Hit up the trousers section, however (Or the jumpsuits section, if there is one – oh lord, the things we’ve seen in jumpsuit sections!) and often we’ll end up having to call in reinforcements. It’s THAT bad.

We’ve no idea why it is that trousers, jeans and jumpsuits seem to be that bit more likely to be crimes of fashion, but it’s true. Here are some recent examples:

tie-side leggings

[Buy them here]

The print alone would’ve made these a suspect, but the ties at the side prompted us to arrest them instantly. Quite apart from the way they look, we’re wondering (and we hate that we’re wondering this, seriously) what kind of underwear would work with such a garment? We’re thinking going commando would probably be the only option here – unless, of course, you want to make VPL an important element of your look?

ashish BARF jeans

[Buy them here]

In contrast to the first item, a pair of jeans with the word ‘BARF’ on the hip can start to seem almost wearable. It’s sad when that happens, isn’t it? If you look closely at the model’s right knee, youll see that these jeans are also swearing at us: nice! Right back atchya, £1,600 jeans!

rivet jeans

[Buy them here]

Finally, after what we’ve just seen, these jeans seem almost tame. Still completely incomprehensible to us, obviously, but at least you won’t have really bad VPL, or risk getting into a fight with someone who decides your jeans are cursing at them, so we guess if we HAD to wear one of the three, these are the ones we’d choose. We’re really hoping it never comes to that, though…

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Crimes Against Denim from Cheap Monday

Cheap Monday paint spatter jeans

[Buy them here]

Imagine, if you will, that you’re wearing your very favourite pair of black skinny jeans. OK, they’re starting to look a little bit grey and worn, but that’s OK, because it just makes them look even better. Some people actually PAY to buy brand new jeans that look like they’ve been worn to death, but you’re no fashion victim, so you’ve worn yours in the old-fashioned way: by actually, you know, wearing them. Some people still do that, apparently.

But we digress. There you are, wearing your favourite jeans, when – horror of horrors! – you spill a can of white paint ALL OVER THEM. (Don’t ask us what you were doing painting in your favourite jeans: we didn’t think that far ahead). OH NO. Quick pop quiz for you: do you…

a) Scream in horror, rip them off and throw them in the wash, in a desperate bid to save them?

b) Shrug your shoulders and accept your fate: they were old anyway, and you probably shouldn’t have worn them to paint in, should you?

c) Think, “OMG, SO FASHIONABLE!” and then rush to take a photo to post on Instagram. Because #edgy.

If you answered C, you’re probably going to love these Cheap Monday jeans. You might also like this look:

bad denim  by Cheap Monday

Well, SOMEONE has to like this look, surely? Our favourite bit is the giant tear right at the pocket: now THAT’S classy.

We’re fairly sure neither jacket nor jeans would pass the eBay test, and we also think that if you were to take these into a homeless shelter, say, as a donation, they’d probably turn you away – and be a little offended that you’d try to palm off such useless items on them. Only the privileged, after all, would actually see this kind of look as a fashion statement…

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans, Trousers/Pants

Please make it stop.

badly ripped jeans

This is a joke, right? Please, someone tell us this is a joke: we’re not sure we can handle the idea of a world in which people will willingly hand over £116 in order to wear jeans that look like they’re only just managing to hold themselves together. Seriously, if you really MUST make yourself look like this, at least rip up an old pair of jeans you no longer have any use for: it still won’t look good, but at least it won’t feel like taking your money and throwing it down the drain.

In comparison to the above, that whole ’70s-revival’ we’ve been talking about is actually starting to sound pretty good.

trousers or pyjamas?

Oh no, sorry, our mistake: it’s NOT starting to sound good. This girl, for instance, looks like she’s out in her pyjamas. If we saw her in the street, we’d wonder if we should perhaps stop her and ask if we could call someone to come pick her up. On the plus side, at least she won’t need to get changed when she gets home – she can just go straight to bed. (That’s not a ‘plus side’, just in case you were wondering: if your outdoor clothes could easily pass for pyjamas, they’re probably a crime of fashion…)

Also triggering our ‘probably a crime of fashion’ radar this week is this:

lovehearts outfit

Any day now, we’ll be getting a press release informing us that this is “the perfect Valentine’s Day look!”Because it has hearts on it, and people wear clothes with hearts on Valentine’s Day. ANY hearts, that is: it doesn’t matter if it looks good, or looks like something you’d only wear for a bet (and maybe not even then): if it has hearts, or is pink, it’s “perfect”. Any day now: just you wait and see…

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Crime of Fashion? Suspender jeans

suspender jeans

It’s our first arrest of 2015, and we really hope this one hasn’t set the tone for the year, because we just don’t think our officers could cope with more than one pair of “suspender” jeans.

Actually, it’s hard enough to believe there’s a demand for this pair. They’re $450 for one thing (And that’s the sale price, by the way – they WERE $750), and also, well, LOOK AT THEM.

This fashion crime is particularly amusing to us, because one of our very first arrests (We can’t seem to locate it in the archive, and that’s probably a good thing, trust us…) involved a pair of jeans not unlike these in concept, but which were clearly a bad DIY job. Back then, such an item was strictly a novelty item, and everyone was in agreement that it was a true Crime of Fashion. Now, however, it’s 2015, and look how far we’ve come! Now major designer brands like Moschino (For yes, these are indeed the work of Jeremy Scott. We bet no one’s even remotely surprised by that, huh?) are making them – and are apparently selling them, too, for Opening Ceremony inform us that this particular pair is low in stock. Better act fast if you want a pair, people! Then you better RUN fast, from The Fashion Police…

It’s unclear whether or not the suspender section can be detached from the shorts. If it does, we guess you’d at least have two items for the (extortionate) price of one: a pair of denim hotpants and…er, a pair of denim chaps. It’s true that we don’t know many people over the age of 21 who’d actually want to wear either of those two items, let alone both of then put together (Actually, we don’t think we know any people UNDER the age of 21 who’d wear them either, to be fair…), but there must be someone out there who’d wear them, or why would they exist?

Why indeed.

[buy them here for $450]
Jeans, Style On Trial

Style Trial | Unusually embellished denim

We realise we’re fighting a losing battle here, but we firmly believe that denim is almost always at its best when its kept nice and simple. We don’t object to a bit of distressing, and it might surprise you to know that we don’t even TOTALLY hate the look of ripped jeans. (Just as long as it’s not taken to ridiculous levels…) What we can’t really bring ourselves to love, however, is THIS kind of thing:

House of Holland ripped jeans

House of Holland ripped jeans, £195

Now, we’ve seen worse, we’ll give you that. Especially from House of Holland. In fact, to be completely honest, these are really quite restrained from House of Holland. They’re also veering dangerously close to ‘subtle clown costume’ territory, and that’s certainly enough to trigger our fashion crime radar, although whether it’s enough to actually get them arrested is up to you.

Also up on trial today are these £535 pearl-embellished boyfriend jeans:

pearl studded jeans

Tu Es Mon Tresor pearl studded jeans, £535

For us, the main appeal of boyfriend jeans is that they create a “not trying too hard” look. Stitching hundreds of pearls onto your legs would definitely count as trying quite hard, as we think it kinda ruins the simplicity of the look, but if you disagree (and plenty of people obviously DO), these ones are selling out fast despite the high price tag, so you better grab ’em fast.


marc by marc jacobs cartoon jeans

Marc by Marc Jacobs cartoon jeans, £370

We’re guessing many of you will be too young to remember the late 80s/early 90s (lucky you!), but there was a trend during that time for “cartoon jeans”, which, as the name suggests, had giant, tacky cartoon figures stuck to them. (In a plasticy, applique material, which would gradually start to peel off with each wash: nice!). The Flintstones were popular, we seem to recall. Anyway, they looked almost exactly like these Marc by Marc Jacobs creations, and were also worn with high-top sneakers, complete with giant, puffy tongues, which had to stick straight up in the air, as in the image above. We’d hoped those times were gone for good. We were wrong.

What do you think, fashion force? These items are all On Trial: are they guilty or innocent? 
Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Crime of Fashion? Ripped knee jeans take over

Ripped jeans have been around since… well, probably since the first person who ripped their jeans by accident and thought, “Hey, this doesn’t look half bad! Kind of edgy and fashion-forward, in fact: I’ll keep wearing these, by God!”

There is, however, more than one way for jeans to be distressed (There’s more than one way for The Fashion Police to be distressed, too, actually: this blog is proof of that!), and we’re sure you can’t have failed to notice that the current most popular way looks like this:

ripped knee jeans

All jeans: Topshop

One very narrow, very precise slit, cut right across the knee of each leg, while the rest of the denim remains untouched. They’re ripped-knee jeans, and they’re everywhere: to the extent that it’s becoming hard to find a pair of jeans that still have their knees intact. There’s going to be a lot of people walking around with very cold knees this winter, is all we have to say.

Actually, no, that’s NOT all we have to say. Of course not! You didn’t think we could let this tend go un-commented on, did you? You also probably didn’t think we’d actually LIKE this look, and you’d be right on that score: in fact, all we see, when we look at these jeans, is denim SO tight the wearer was forced to cut slashes into the knees, to allow their legs to bend. Oh, and depending on the jeans, we also sometimes see a little smiling mouth on each knee. Please tell us we’re not the only ones who can see that? Wouldn’t it be tempting to draw a little set of eyes right above each “mouth”, so you’d have two little tiny faces on your legs? Try UN-seeing that, now that we’ve put the image into your minds…

What do you think, fashion force? Do you love the split-kneed jeans or hate them? Are they crimes of fashion?
Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

The Worst Denim of 2013

worst denim of 2013

Good morning Fashion Police officers! With the Christmas holiday fast approaching, we expect those of you with some time-off booked for this week will be feeling pretty de-mob happy by now: we know we are! Rather than get to work hunting down brand new crimes of fashion, then, we figured we’d leave that until next year, and continue our look back through the 2013 archives instead.

Today, it’s the turn of our old friend – and occasional foe – denim. The one fabric we should be able to depend on when we don’t know what else to wear, denim can be a very, very good thing indeed. However, it can also be very, very bad, and those are the times we’re interested in today. Here are some of the worst uses of denim in 2013: enjoy!

Gallery: The Worst Denim of 2013

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Jailed Jeans: some recent denim arrests

For many of us, jeans are a wardrobe staple: the kind of item that forms the basis of tons of great outfits, and which requires very little thought to style. For others, however, jeans are a one-way ticket straight to Fashion Police jail: here are some denim disasters which caught the attention of our officers recently…

wide-leg jeans

Shield jeans, £135

Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it some kind of denim-clad superhero, out to save the world from ugly jeans – presumably by wearing them herself? All of these options would make much more sense than the truth, which is that this is simply a pair of jeans with super-wide legs, roughly hemmed down the sides to create this “caped crusader” effect. We’d love to see someone wearing these on a windy day: just imagine how well those “wings” would flap in the breeze!

ugly layered jeans

Iceberg layered jeans, £140

You’re probably thinking this suspect is simply a pair of jeans with very large turn-ups. We did, too. If you look closely, though (You may need to go to the Yoox website and use the “zoom” feature to get the full effect), you’ll see that what you’re looking at here is actually a teeny-tiny pair of jeans, layered over a regular-length pair of trousers (Or designed to LOOK that way, at least), so the final effect is of someone who was wearing her own clothes, but then unaccountably decided to steal some little kid’s jeans and try to cram them on over the top. Because THAT doesn’t look uncomfortable at all, does it?

Speaking of jeans that are too short, one solution to that problem is to hack the bottoms off another, completely different, pair of jeans, and attach them to the bottom of the outgrown pair:

flared jeans

ANOTHER solution is to throw out the too-short jeans, and just buy a pair that actually fit. We know which option we’d prefer….

Which of these three options would YOU prefer, though? Just say you HAD to pick one, in a ‘Wear or Die’ type situation: which would you go for?

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Crime of Fashion? ASOS busted knee jeans

busted knee jeans

ASOS busted knee jeans, £32

When we asked you for your thoughts on boyfriend jeans earlier this week, a couple of you commented that while you don’t mind the style of them, you’re not so keen on deliberately distressed denim. We’d have to concur with that: while we don’t mind a little bit of distressing on a casual pair of jeans, we definitely wouldn’t want to pay a lot of money for a look we can easily achieve just by rummaging around in the back of the closet until we find that old pair of jeans that have seen better days, but which we keep around just in case we decide to do a bit of DIY or gardening in them.

When it comes to the look above, though? Yeah, we think we’ll pass on that one: mostly because this poor model looks like she’s just had to crawl five miles on her hands and knees, and now her best pair of black skinnies are totally busted as a result. Also: unless you’re planning to wear tights underneath them (Tights and skinnies REALLY doesn’t sound like a comfortable combination to us, but each to their own), wouldn’t your knees get super-cold in these? Are freezing knees a THING now? Did we miss that memo?

Still, at £35, at least these aren’t a particularly expensive way to get the “busted knee” jeans. We guess we COULD argue that cutting the knees out of an old pair of your existing jeans would be even cheaper, but … you got that, didn’t you? We thought so.

So: are these a crime of fashion? And does anyone else feel a powerful compulsion to draw little smiley faces on the model’s knees, or is that just us?

Jeans, Style On Trial

Style Trial | Boyfriend jeans

While the skinny still reigns supreme in the world of denim, this year skintight styles have found themselves a rival in the saggy, baggy shape of boyfriend jeans:

boyfriend jeans

Boyfriend jeans available at Shopbop

Boyfriend jeans, of course, aren’t a new thing, so we very much doubt you’ll need us to tell you that they are exactly what they sound like: not your ACTUAL boyfriend’s jeans, but simply jeans that are designed to LOOK like they belong to your boyfriend. The idea is to create that , “Gosh, aren’t I cute, just wandering around in my boyfriend’s clothes!” look, so the jeans in question are intentionally oversized, slouchy and often (although not always) a little more distressed than regular jeans tend to be.

So, what do we think of them? Let’s look at the pros and cons:

Boyfriend jeans: the case for the prosecution

* Although boyfriend jeans are designed to make you look like you’re wearing someone else’s clothes, this isn’t always an easy look to pull off, and sometimes you can end up LITERALLY looking like you’re wearing someone else’s clothes, which you put on in a hurry, while getting dressed in the dark. Also, although they’re supposed to look oversized, there’s a difference between “slouchy” and simply looking like you’re wearing jeans that are too big for you. Boyfriend jeans can very easily put you in the latter group.

* No one really wants to make their butt look saggier than it actually is. Do they?

* They’re sloppy, and therefore only suited to very casual situations

* They require careful styling, so you don’t end up with the look described in the first bullet point.

Boyfriend jeans: the case for the defence

* They’re comfortable: that has to count for something, doesn’t it?

* They’re perfect for those days when you don’t want to look like you tried too hard

* They look great with heels, providing you with an excellent excuse to break out all of those OTT heels which would be too much with a dressier outfit, but which are the perfect foil for the causal boyfriend jean.

* It’s just nice to have an option other than skinnies sometimes, you know?

We’re sure you can come up with some other arguments for either the defence or the prosecution, and we’d love to hear them. Once you’re done debating, though, we need to hear your verdict:

Innocent or guilty?

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Mom jeans go two-tone at Topshop

Well, looks like Topshop are still trying to make “mom” jeans happen:

Topshop two-tone mom jeans

[Get them here]

(Disclaimer: last time we talked about “mom” jeans, some ACTUAL moms got offended and thought we were trying to imply they didn’t know how to dress themselves. There was a lot of “I’m a mom, and I would NEVER wear these: YOU SUCK FOR SAYING THAT, Fashion Police!” Just for the avoidance of doubt, let the record show that “mom jeans” is a term used to describe a particular style of jeans: ones with a high waist, a tapered leg, and often in some kind of dated wash, like acid wash, for instance. No moms were harmed in the making of these jeans, we promise!)

These mom jeans, however, are moms with a difference: they just can’t make their mind up what they want to be. Oh, they know they want to be mom jeans, obviously, but which wash to go for: 80s-style acid wash, or a classic mid-blue? Decisions like this are the kind of thing that can drive a girl crazy, so thankfully we don’t have to choose with these: we can have both! In the same pair of jeans! Awesome!

Why did Topshop do this to these jeans? Your guess is as good as ours, but we’re assuming it’s some kind of attempt to make them “edgy”. Because if it ain’t edgy, it ain’t FASHION, is it? With that said, this whole “mom jean” trend has been going on for a while now, which is surprising in itself. We can’t really imagine looking at this particular cut and thinking “Yup, that’s the look for me!” but then again, we can’t imagine wearing pyjamas in public, or buying an adult onesie either, and yet people do. PEOPLE DO.

What do you think of mom jeans in general, and two-tone mom jeans in particular? Does the “edgy” wash help or hinder their bid to be deemed an acceptable part of the modern wardrobe?

Are mom jeans a crime of fashion?


Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Stuck-Together-Clothes Crimes: Phillip Lim pants with attached sweater

jeans with sweater tied around the waistPhillip Lim jeans, $595

Just in case you hadn’t realised, the 90s grunge look is currently going through a bit of a revival, and with it comes that “look, I’ve casually tied a sweater around my waist!” look showcased in the image above.

Of course, there’s nothing inherently wrong with tying a sweater (Or, better yet, a lumberjack shirt…) around your waist. In fact, sometimes it’s the most convenient way to carry such an item at times when it all-of-a-sudden becomes too warm to wear it, but you want to keep your hands free for something else. It happens. We wouldn’t describe it as the cutting edge of style, exactly, but… it happens. And now it’s “trendy”, which means that fashion designers can no longer trust us to carry out the simple act of tying a sweater around our own waists, so they’ve helpfully stepped in and done it for us. They’ve also attached the sweater to the seat of our pants, just to make sure we don’t mess it up. By “they”, we mean Phillip Lim. And by “our pants”, we mean, “these $595 pants”.

Yes, such is the apparent complexity of the “sweater around the waist” look that some people are apparently willing to spend $600 to achieve a look that most of us would be able to create for free, simply by, well, tying a sweater around our waists. This sweater, however, is not like the ones you may have worn in just such a manner yourself at some point. No, this sweater is stitched onto the waistband of the jeans, in a manner that Shopbop describes as “clever” and we’d describe as “possibly the most useless thing ever”. You’ll never be able to wear that sweater, you see. And you’ll never be able to wear the jeans either, unless you always want the sweater to come with them. Such is the way of the Stuck-Together-Clothes.

The worrying thing is, this isn’t the first time this year we’ve been called out to this kind of crime. The Rihanna for River Island collection, for instance, also contained a number of items with sweaters or shirts attached to their hips: of course, the Rihanna for River Island collection didn’t sell for $600 per item. We’re grateful for small mercies.

Ask the Fashion Police, Jeans, Shoes

Style SOS: Which shoes to wear with skinny jeans?

The post ‘What shoes to wear with skinny jeans‘ has been moved to our sister site, – please click here to read it!

which shoes to wear with skinny jeans?

All shoes: Shopbop

No one likes the “cankles” effect, and wearing shoes designed to chop the leg in half at the ankle are a really easy way to create cankles where they don’t exist. This becomes even more of an issue with jeans which hug the ankles anyway, which is why so many people have trouble working out which shoes will look good with skinny jeans, and which ones will create the dreaded “golf club” effect. ShoeperWoman helps solve that dilemma with some skinny jeans styling suggestions. If you’re looking for some posts to read here at The Fashion Police, however, here are some suggestions for you:


ShoeperWoman may have the shoes question sorted, but what ELSE should you wear with skinny jeans? This article helps you work out what to wear – and, more importantly, what NOT to wear – with your skinnies.


Don’t worry, this pair of pants gives you the worst of both worlds!


So, you know what shoes to wear with them, and you know what clothes to wear with them, but now you have one more question to answer: should you be wearing skinny jeans AT ALL? This post was inspired by a question for our readers, and talks about the idea of “age-appropriate” dressing, and how old is TOO old for skinny jeans. Our conclusion is that you’re NEVER too old to wear something you love, but you might have a different take on this one, so join in the discussion here.


If regular skinnies aren’t quite, er, skinny enough for you, try these for size…

Jeans, Style On Trial

DYDDD: Do You Do Double Denim?

Officers, it’s time to re-open the double denim debate:

is double denim a crime of fashion?

Both outfits: ZARA

In the past, we’ve always dismissed double denim as an automatic crime of fashion. After a couple of failed attempts at becoming “trendy”, however, this year the Texas Tuxedo (or Canadian Tuxedo, depending where you come from) has actually started to gain a foothold on the world of fashion, and is starting to be seen here, there and, well, everywhere, basically. The two looks above were styled by the people at Zara (Well, we say “styled”: it’s actually not that hard to throw on a pair of jeans and a denim shirt, but hey…), but they’re far from the only brand currently pushing double denim as the casual outfit of choice.

Fashion bloggers have been amongst the first to embrace the “all denim, all-the-time” look, which has so far mostly revolved around the wearing a pair of jeans with a denim – sorry, CHAMBRAY – shirt, more or less as shown in the images above. (Extra points if you add a “statement” necklace to complete the look…) One thing we’ve noticed, however, is that while some bloggers do manage to pull it off, almost all address the subject of double denim with a slightly apologetic and/or defiant tone. It’s never, “Look, you guys, don’t you just LOVE that double denim is back?!” – it’s always more like, “I’m challenging myself to wear a trend I’m not quite sure about, purely because it’s a trend, and I feel like I should.”

That’s all very well and good and obviously, but we tend to feel that if your outfit is a “challenge”, that’s probably a good sign that you’re not quite comfortable in it, and we’d rather be predictable-but-happy than edgy-and-uncomfortable any day. That’s just us, though, so today we put to you the question: what do you think of the so-called “revival” of double denim? Is it something you’d wear, or do you think one piece of denim per outfit is more than enough?

Is double denim a crime of fashion?

Double denim is perfectly OK by Alexander McQueen
Crime of Fashion? Levis’ Texas Tuxedo denim romper
Double denim clothes crimes

Jeans, Style On Trial

Trend Trial: Dungarees

DUNGAREES: the word alone is enough to strike fear into a Fashion Police’ officer’s beating heart.

We’ve made no secret of our dislike of the bib overall – or “dungas” as Vogue likes to call them. To us, they’re a really easy way to look like an overgrown toddler, or alternatively, like a farm boy, and while we have nothing against either toddlers or farm boys, we’d rather leave that particular look to them, thanks very much. With dungarees – sorry, “dungas” – being touted as one of the big fashion trends of the year, however, and the stores we love slowly starting to fill up with denim overalls, we figured it was time to re-visit that opinion, and ask you…

Are dungarees a crime of fashion?

denim dungarees with flatform shoes

Bleach dungarees, Topshop

As with all of our style and trend trials, your answer to this question is going to come down to a matter of personal taste. Although we like to put fashion tends “on trial”, there really is no right or wrong answer here, which is why it’s a good job The Fashion Police aren’t actually real. As Vogue notes, dungarees, perhaps more than most items, tend to inspire a “love ’em or hate ’em” response in people: we’re describing them as a “trend” here because they appeared on many of the Spring 2013 runways, and are currently going through something of a fashion revival because of that. For those who love them, however, dungarees have never been OUT of fashion… and to those who hate them, they’ll never be in style.

Which side are you on in the great dungaree debate? Are you welcoming their current “trend” status as a great opportunity to indulge in one of your favourite looks, or do you find yourself yelling “Call The Fashion Police!” every time you see a pair?

How do you feel about dungarees? Take a look at our gallery and then tell us what you think…

Fashion Polls & Debates, Jeans

How much would you pay for…the perfect jeans?

The perfect jeans: they’re one of the Holy Grails of fashion, and they’re almost as difficult to find, too. In fact, if we were given the choice between a quest for the Grail, and a quest for the perfect jeans, we’d probably choose the former. Well, at least we’d get to see a bit of the world that way: when you’re searching for a new pair of jeans, all you get to see is the inside of a lot of sweaty changing rooms.

Given the difficulty of the task at hand, then, today we begin a short series of polls in which we aim to find out just how much you typically spend on those so-called “basics”. Of course, this question is a bit of a “how long is a piece of string” one, because it depends so much on individual budgets and circumstances, but purely out of curiosity, today we want to know… how much are you prepared to spend on the perfect jeans?

the perfect jeans

For some people, jeans are one of those can’t-live-without-’em items, worn for everything from a lazy morning’s lounging, worn with a comfortable hoodie or sweater, to a dressed-up evening out, with heels and a sparkly top. For others, however, they’re never worn at all: sometimes because they just don’t fit with the person’s personal style, and sometimes because it’s just SO DARN HARD to find the perfect fit.

Why is it that the perfect jeans are so difficult to find, we wonder? Other items aren’t always easy, sure, but judging by the (totally unscientific) conversations we’ve had with friends and readers, jeans seem to be the trickiest of all. We’re sure you all know the drill:

1. They fit in the waist, but the legs are so tight you feel like a sausage.

2. They fit in the legs… but the waist is either so big you get a bad case of “builder’s butt” every time you sit down, or so tight you can’t sit down at all.

3. They fit in the waist and the thighs, but the legs are so long you’d need stilts, or so short you look like you’re wearing someone’s hand-me-downs. (And yes, you can always have them hemmed in the first scenario, but let’s face it: you’d rather not, wouldn’t you?)

4. They fit just fine (Yes, this is unlikely, but just go with it…), but they’re acid wash, or have a truly obnoxious level of distressing on them, or some other detail that makes you more likely to go out in public nude than wear them.

You get the picture. We’re sure you do.

Just say you manage to find the perfect jeans, though. They do exist, though. They’re out there, somewhere, and SOMEONE has to find them, so let’s just imagine it’s you. How much would you be prepared to spend on them, do you think? Would you see them as investment piece, and be willing to drop a large amount of cash in order to bring the quest to an end, or would you think, “Well, they’re still just jeans?”  and turn your back on them unless they were less than a certain amount?

How much are you prepared to spend on the perfect jeans?

Crimes of Fashion, Jeans

Ombre jeans at ASOS: Crime of Fashion?

Late last week, The Fashion Police spotted these ombre jeans over at ASOS. We’re pretty sure they’re a crime of fashion, but what do YOU think? Let’s take a look at the evidence, shall we?

ombre jeans in acid wash

Ombre jeans: a crime of fashion?

The ombre trend has been around for a while now. It started out with hair, and seemed like a great excuse for everyone to give up hair dye and just let their roots grow out in the name of fashion. Then it spread to clothes. We’ve seen ombre applied to just about every item you can think of, and this definitely isn’t the worst pair of ombre jeans we’ve seen. We do think they could be one of the worst, though, because :

a) They’re acid wash. We’ve already established acid wash as a crime of fashion, and we don’t think we’ll be changing our minds on that any time soon.

b) Er, does anyone else think it looks like this model sat in some wet, pink paint? Or had some kind of unfortunate “accident”? We’ll leave that one up to your imaginations…

Still, at least it makes her look different from this model:

model in blue ombre jeans

This one just looks like God grabbed her by the head and dipped her, feet-first, into a tub of bleach. It’s a cruel and unusual punishment, to be sure, and while we reckon this second example of ombre jeans is definitely better than the first, we’re leaning towards declaring ombre jeans to be a crime of fashion.

In fact, we’re leaning towards declaring the ombre trend in general to be a crime of fashion, because is it just us, or should that particular “trend” be over by now? As Ross once said in Friends, “Wasn’t this just supposed to be a fling? Shouldn’t it be…flung by now?”

We’d very much like the fashion world’s fling with ombre to be flung. What say you?



Gimme 5: Polka dot print jeans

five pairs of polka dot print jeans

Five pairs of polka dot print jeans, coming up…

Polka dot print jeans have been around for a couple of seasons now (and, of course, polka dots are a print that never really die…) but while last year’s look was all bold, black and white dots, this year the trend has taken a slightly more subtle turn: think faded denim, faded dots, and a smaller, more subtle print. This is mostly being applied to blue jeans rather than coloured ones, although you’ll find polka dots on all kinds of denim, if you look hard enough.

If you’re looking for the kind of dot print jeans described above, however, you don’t have to worry, because we’ve done the looking for you. Here are five pairs of dot print jeans, in this season’s style…

Marc by Marc Jacobs polka dot jeans

Marc by Marc Jacobs standard supply dot print jeans, $198

We’re starting off with the designer version of this look, which also happens to be the most “in your face”. Marc Jacob has gone for large dots on a ripped denim background, and a very faded, lived-in look, which suggests you’ve had these jeans for, OH, YEARS. This is ironic, considering they’ll cost you $198 brand new. We tend to think that the perfect jeans are worth investing in, if you’re lucky enough to find them (And God knows, THAT isn’t easy…), but would you spend that much on what is essentially a “novelty” print?

Gap 1969 geo print legging skimmer jeans

Gap 1969 geo print legging skimmer jeans, $54.99

Gap’s geo print legging skimmer jeans are a lot more afforable, at $54.99, and a lot more subtle, too, although they’re still very clearly polka dot jeans: it would be hard to miss the print on the mid-wash denim. If you’d rather go subtler still, however…

ASOS spot print jeans

ASOS vintage wash skinny jeans with lazer spot print, £35

This ASOS version has a dot that’s barely even noticeable at first glance. In fact, these could just be the jeans you wore to paint the bathroom that one time. That might not be a good look, now we come to think of it…

H&M Jeans with faded dot print

H&M dot print jeans, £29.99

H&M attach their dots to a classic, dark wash denim, with some fading on the thighs. Unlike the other jeans featured, these are ankle-length, so may work for shorter women, too. Finally, at the cheapest end of the market…

Forever 21 dotted skinny jeans

Forever 21 dotted skinny jeans, $24.80

 … It’s good ol’ Forever 21, whose dotted skinny jeans are just $24.80, but are a pretty good take on the trend.

What do you think of polka dot jeans?

Are they a refreshing variation on the classic blue jean, or do you take the point of view that blue jeans weren’t broken, so don’t need to fixed – especially not with a cutesy little print? If you do like them, which pair would you choose?