Style On Trial: Fashion crime or must-have item?

Style Trial: ASOS Extreme Oversized Cat Eye Sunglasses

ASOS Extreme Oversized Cat Eye Sunglasses Style Trial: ASOS Extreme Oversized Cat Eye Sunglasses

The Fashion Police love cat eye sunglasses. In fact, it would be really easy for us to go too far with this look. And then we’d end up looking like this:

ASOS Extreme Oversized Cat Eye Sunglasses1 Style Trial: ASOS Extreme Oversized Cat Eye Sunglasses

What do you think: extremely stylish or extremely ridiculous? The choice, dear jurors, is yours…

[Click here to buy them]

Style Trial: River Island polka dot and stripe ankle grazer jeans

polka dot and stripe jeans Style Trial: River Island polka dot and stripe ankle grazer jeans

The Fashion Police love polka dots. We also love stripes. We’re not even averse to the odd bit of pattern-mixing, provided it’s done right.

Are these River Island jeans the right way to mix patterns, though? With one spotty leg and one stripey one, they’re either the best of both worlds, or twice as ugly as they need to be, depending on your opinion.

What IS your opinion on these? Are they innocent or guilty of committing crimes of fashion?

[Click here to buy them]

Style Trial: Miu Miu printed fabric Western boots. With elephants.

miu miu western print boots Style Trial: Miu Miu printed fabric Western boots. With elephants.

Elephants. And… 70s wallpaper. You’ll never see one without thinking of the other now, will you?

These fabric boots are by Miu Miu, who like their footwear to veer abruptly from the sublime to the ridiculous, with absolutely no middle ground. In fact, we don’t think we’ve ever seen a pair of Miu Miu shoes we didn’t either love or hate. They just don’t seem to do do “meh”, which we guess is a good thing. No one likes “meh” after all.

Which are these, though? Are they sublime, or are they ridiculous? Are they innocent, or are they guilty of the charge of committing crimes of fashion? Jurors, it’s up to you to decide…

[Miu MIu Western printed boots, £795: click here to buy them]

Style Trial: Olympia Le Tan ‘Wiagra’ Pill Box Clutch Bag

olympia le tan wiagra box bag Style Trial: Olympia Le Tan Wiagra Pill Box Clutch Bag

As we’ve mentioned many a time, The Fashion Police are big fans of Olympia Le Tan’s ‘Book’ clutches, which allow the nerdy, bookish types amongst us to walk around looking like we’re carrying one of the classics, when actually, it’s just a clutch bag. Genius.

This ‘Wiagra’ box bag, though? We’re not so sure. Designed to look like a box of viagra tablets, these ones come from Olympia’s “Love Pharmacy” and promise to “give your man  a massive hard on”. We’re glad she spelt that out for us. On a handbag.

What do you think: a quirky, funny accessory which you just can’t wait to carry around (it would be particularly appropriate for that first meeting with your boyfriend’s parents, don’t you think?), or just a little bit too crude for comfort?

[Olympia Le Tan 'Wiagra' clutch, £260, Colette: click here to buy it.]

Style Trial: Pointed toes on shoes

pointed toes on shoes Style Trial: Pointed toes on shoes

(Clockwise, from left: Boutique9, Elizabeth and James, Guess, Gianvito Rossi, Dune)

Shoes with pointy toes: they were acceptable in the 80s. And in the 90s. And for a good part of the “naughties” too. (Nope, still can’t write that without cringing…) And, for some people at least, it would seem that they’re acceptable right now, in the summer of 2012, too. Yes, the pointed toe is making a comeback, ousting the chunky platform from its position as top dog of the shoe world, and infiltrating shoe stores and closets around the world.

The question is: what do we all make of this development?

The Case for Pointed Toes:

Today’s pointed toes, you’ll no doubt be pleased to know, are just a little shorter, and a little  less pointed than their predecessors’. This means that although they still create that sharp, elongated silhouette, they stop short of making your feet look like canoes. Or some of them do, anyway. The pointed toe also creates a more elegant shape: most of these styles are minus the huge platform soles which have been around for so long now we’ve almost forgotten what height we are without them, and that may be welcome news for those of you who’ve spent the last decade or so in platform purgatory, wondering if you’d ever be able to buy shoes again.

The pointed toes also look good with things like super-skinny jeans and cropped pants, both of which continue to be popular. If you try to wear a chunky, round-toed platform with very narrow pants, you can end up being ALL FEET. Especially if the platforms in question are something like Jeffrey Campbell‘s Litas, say. Ahem. A more pointed toe, however, helps streamline the look, and can be more flattering than you might expect. Can be.

So that’s the good news.

The Case Against Pointed Toes

Despite all of the Good Things mentioned above, the fact still remains: for a lot of us, pointed toes can still look pretty dated, bringing to mind the neon stilettos of the 80s and, well, witches, basically. Not only that, but a longer toe obviously leads to the illusion of a longer foot, and if you thought those Lita’s were bad, you were totally right, just wait until you see someone in super-skinny jeans and shoes with a very long, pointed toe: you’ll think you’re looking at a golf club, seriously.

So, what’s the verdict, Fashion Jurors? Do you welcome the return of the pointed toes? Will you be embracing them, and digging some old pairs out of the depths of the closet, or will you simply slam the closet door, wedge it shut, and tell anyone who’ll listen that they’ll have to prise your rounded toes off your cold, dead feet?

Style Trial: Jil Sander Tartan organza and cotton dress

jil sander tartan and gauze dress Style Trial: Jil Sander Tartan organza and cotton dress

Net-a-Porter have been promoting this Jil Sander dress fairly heavily this week, which puzzles us a little, because we’re seeing a dinner lady’s apron with some kind of protective fabric over the top. You know, so you can wipe it clean.

Are you seeing something else when you look at this dress? Something good? If you are, you better speak up, because otherwise this is going straight to fashion jail.

So: innocent or guilty, what’s the verdict?

Style Trial: Viktor & Rolf Green Open Shoulder Neck Tie Dress

viktor and rolf green dress Style Trial: Viktor & Rolf Green Open Shoulder Neck Tie Dress

As some of you may know, The Fashion Police are big fans of the colour green, and we’re not averse to bows on the neck either.

And yet… as soon as we laid eyes on this Viktor & Rolf dress, we just fell about laughing. And we can’t seem to stop. In fact, we’re laughing as we type this now. It’s like she’s dressed as a lettuce for Halloween. And, judging by the slightly stunned expression on her face, this photo seems to capture the exact moment when she realises she’s spent $1,645 to look like this: classic!

Do you think there’s a way this dress could work? Or do you agree with us that it’s a Crime of Fashion? Place your votes below…

Style Trial: Pixie Lott does florals

pixie lott florals Style Trial: Pixie Lott does florals

The Pirates! In an adventure with SCIENTISTS! Ah, for some reason, the name of that movie never fails to raise a smile from us. And so, too, does the sight of Pixie Lot, wearing head to toe – but not belly – florals.

This little outfit is by Dolce & Gabbana, and Pixie has cleverly avoided the “little old lady” effect that floral print can so often have by flashing the aforementioned midriff in bra top, pencil skirt and blazer. There’s even a little bit of the fashion blogger’s favourite thing – pattern mixing – in the shape of the polka dots on the sleeves. So daring!

What’s the verdict, though? Did she succeed in making floral print palatable to you, jurors, or is this outfit guilty of committing crimes of fashion?