You’re possibly wondering why on earth we’re showing you drawings of handbags, rather than actual handbags, aren’t you?
The answer is… we’re not:
These are real handbags, which have been cleverly designed to look like two-dimensional drawings. They’re the work of JumpbyPaper, and we think they’re pretty awesome: all the functionality of a regular bag, but with the added bonus of making you look like you’re starring in your own personal cartoon. And just imagine the looks you’d get from passers-by!
Want one? You can click here to order them direct from the brand themselves.
You know what annoys us? When people – and by “people”, we mean “hipsters” – think that watching very mainstream TV shows, like Doctor Who, say, makes them “geeks”. And then they go around all the time saying things like, “Oh, I can’t wait for the next episode of Doctor Who! I’m such a geek, lol!”
(Other things that annoy us: people who write “lol” at the end of every sentence, regardless of whether it’s appropriate or not, lol!)
That has absolutely nothing to do with this Tardis purse, by the way. We just wanted to get it off our chests.
We’ve shown you some of Azumi & David’s amazing (We may or may not be using that word sarcastically) shoe/handbag hybrids before, but that was a long time ago, so just to remind you, this is a clutch bag:
No, seriously, it’s a clutch bag. What, you didn’t seriously think they’d just grabbed an old boot, thrown some random belongings inside it, and called it a “bag”, did you? Oh no, wait. they kind of did. Moving on, there was also this work of genius:
See, it’s a bag… but it’s also a shoe! Only, not really, because if you tried to put these on your feet, you’d get some funny looks, wouldn’t you? Then again, if you carried it as a bag, you’d probably STILL get some funny looks: such is the tragedy of the shoe/bag. We’d say it was a bag for shoe lovers, but… shoe lovers probably wouldn’t actually love this, would they?
As interesting as all of this isn’t, however, we feel Azumi & David have really excelled themselves with the latest incarnation of their “Bag that is also a shoe”. Witness:
You have to ask yourself what the shoe did to deserve this, really, don’t you? Why has it been imprisoned in plastic, like Han Solo in carbonite? WHY?
We bet you’re just desperate to know what it looks like from the back, aren’t you? Let’s just pretend you all answered “yes” to that, OK?
As horrifying as this is, it does at least show that there are, in fact, TWO shoes trapped inside the bag. So at least you’re getting the pair, you know? Perhaps that’s what justifies the £200 price tag?
SUSPECT: shoe/handbag hybrids SPOTTED: Azumi & David website PRICE: £140 down from £200 FASHION POLICE VERDICT: GUILTY
It’s not like us to go for something Barbie pink. Or something which costs $1,295, for that matter. As soon as our officers laid eyes on this pink Miu Miu tote bag, however, we knew we had to have it – even if only in the “fantasy shopping” sense. It IS almost Christmas, after all. And we’ve been very, very good this year…
We get that canvas shoppers can be handy. For, you know, groceries, and trips to the beach, and other such affairs. And we get that they can be cute, and funny, and, dare we say it, quirky. (We feel dirty now.) We know that Anya Hindmarch, in particular, is beloved by the fashion world, and possessed of an extraordinary ability to convince people that her canvas tote bags are worth paying $295 for, like the one shown above.
Are they, though?
We’re going to go with a big fat NO. Because, honestly, we could buy lots of pairs of shoes for that. Or a really good quality leather handbag. And we can pick up canvas totes almost anywhere, for a few pounds at most – or sometimes even free, when summer rolls around and magazines start giving the things away.
What do you think, though? Do you want to drop $300 on a canvas bag? (Note: IT’S DESIGNER.)
These bags are from Jeffrey Campbell’s Girls We Hated in High School line. Luckily we were wearing sunglasses when we looked at them (The Fashion Police never remove our dark glasses) so we have no real problem with the bags themselves: we show you them purely because the expression on the model’s face suggests that girls we hated in high school ended up with three designer handbags strapped to their bodies, in the name of fashion. And that they don’t like it. But modelling is hard, girls! Look who unimpressed this girl is with her 80s outfit and slightly “wacky” pose!
And, you know, you can change her clothes, but you can’t change her ‘tude:
First of all, our apologies for bringing you a bag that costs $1,040 as our Handbag of the Week today. We can’t actually imagine wanting to spend that much on ANY bag, but if this one was a little bit – or, OK, a really BIG bit – cheaper, we’d be sorely tempted.
The colour is what D&G call “make-up” and what The Fashion Police call “pink”. It looks roughly the size of a small suitcase in the image above, but is actually smaller than it looks, and the perfect size to sling over your shoulder and take to work, or play, or anywhere else you fancy. (There’s a photo of it on someone’s shoulder here, if you want to take a look.) We’re not actually sure whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing, given the price, mind you. For $1,000, we’d probably want to be able to LIVE in the thing.
Click here to take a closer look, or, indeed, to buy it, if you’re not remotely daunted by that price tag.
Marc Jacobs’ ‘Francesca’ shopper has been out for a while now, and The Fashion Police have been admiring it for a while, too. We love the slouchy, casual style of this bag, which is perfect for a day’s shopping, or even as a carry on for a short flight, but we must admit, it’s the beautiful teal colour that we really love.
This bag is available in a range of other colours too, including standard black and tan (we rather like the bright yellow version, but that’s just us), and is £343 from the Marc by Marc Jacobs line. Click here to buy it.
