Fashion Police declare war on Crocs

Crocs Girls Mary Jane (Girls') - Red

It’s just not funny any more, is it? I mean, we’ve said nothing about Crocs here – mostly because no one should need The Fashion Police to point out that these, my friends, are a crime of fashion to behold – but it’s come to our attention that some people are actually wearing Crocs with no irony intended, and, well, it’s got to stop really, hasn’t it?

As far as I can tell, there’s nothing to like about Crocs – and before you all start with the "oh, but they’re so comfortable!" thing, save it. I don’t want to know. My skanky old dressing gown is comfortable – sorry, but that doesn’t make me want to wear it out in public. So the "comfort" argument? Totally irrelevant here. You want to know what bothers me more than the regular Crocs, and the flip flop Crocs, and all the freakin’ butt-ugly Crocs in all their many colours, though? It’s these: the Crocs Georgie Boot Womens

Pray for them, folks, and those that wear them.

12 Comments

  • May 16, 2007

    Icy

    Loath crocs. Just terrible shoes. Ok for the beach (maybe) but NO where else.

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  • June 9, 2007

    Phill

    Ewww… aren’t they plastic? That’s disgusting!

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  • June 13, 2007

    Ed

    Standard Crocs alone are terrible, but those Croc boots are in a league of their own of grossness. As if there wasn’t enough ugliness in the world. Nurse, my retinas!

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  • June 20, 2007

    Nickoli

    “oh, but they’re so comfortable!”
    No, they’re not even that.

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  • September 26, 2007

    Haley

    In my beauty school when they were going over the dresscode we were told that crocs are absolutely verboten, which prompted a lengthy digression into how disgusting they really are, during which time I was told that they’re edible. EDIBLE! According to someone from my class, if you’re like, starving to death in the wilderness and you’ve got crocs on, all you have to do is boil them down and voila -sustenance. I’m sort of the callous type so I said that anyone wearing crocs deserves to be lost in the wilderness. Although, I can’t verify that statement at all, I almost want to believe it just because its so bad.

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  • September 27, 2007

    Bunnie

    I used to work in footwear in a discount department sotre. We had knock offs of these things.
    I couldn’t stand having to work near them, due to their smell alone. Smelt like cheap corn chips, which made them all the more disturbing.
    Comfortable? They don’t feel comfortable to the touch, and I don’t think I’d be brave enough to try them on to see. What if ANYONE saw me? Even strangers??
    Nickoli seems to have discovered their only purpose. Food for the starving. Although I personally wouldn’t want to be caught even eating them..
    As for wearing them on their beach, there are perfectly cute yet practical thongs in existance. Which, in my opinion, are surely MORE comfortable as they wouldn’t trap so much sand in the shoe.

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  • September 27, 2007

    Bunnie

    *erm, apologies, I got confused who posted what (I was wondering why I’d been renamed from “Bunnie” to “Haley”)
    Anyway, as you would find it obvious, it was HALEY, not NICKOLI, that made the comment about the shoes edibility.
    Excuse me, it’s 2am here and I’m rather tired.

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  • December 16, 2007

    Johnny Croc

    They are the best LOVE em. Just bought my second pair and a pair of furry ones for my wife.

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  • January 25, 2008

    sodagirl

    Oh man I so love mine they are soooo ugly but I’m on my feet a 16 hours a day and feel no pain, I have really wide feet so I go for comfort anymore Sorry to all those haters out there but I hope they never stop making them :)!

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  • August 30, 2008

    CATHERINE

    I KNOW!!! THOSE ARE BY FAR THE UGLIEST SHOES I’VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE…U WANNA KNOW WOT THE WORST PART IS? EVEN MY FRIEND (WHO I GO TO FASHION SCHOOL WITH) HAS A PAIR! I MEAN COME ON! WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANNA WEAR SOMETHING THAT FRENCH FARMERS USE!!!!!

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  • August 30, 2008

    CATHERINE

    THOSE ARE BY FAR THE UGLIEST SHOES I’VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE…U WANNA KNOW WOT THE WORST PART IS? EVEN MY FRIEND (WHO I GO TO FASHION SCHOOL WITH) HAS A PAIR! I MEAN COME ON! WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANNA WEAR SOMETHING THAT FRENCH FARMERS USE!!!!!

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  • May 28, 2009

    Diandra

    Okay. I can handle Crocs. Good for little kids, nurses, mommies, whatever. But Croc boots? No. way. Not even for children; who wants their kid’s feet to look like a Transformer, or an astronaut, or whatever those are supposed to be.

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