Fashion Police Amnesty on Tunics

Tunics
OK fashion designers and retailers, the game’s up. I want you to come out now with the tunics above your heads (no, not like that!) and no one will get hurt here. That’s it, all the way out…

You see, I’ve had enough. I have tried to love the tunic top, I really have. Hell, I even bought one. I tried to love them, in all their billowing, empire lined glory. I told myself they didn’t make me look like a pregnant lady. I told myself that why, loud, psychedelic prints could totally work. And you know what? They totally could. Just not on me. Because let’s face it: that sole tunic I bought even makes the coathanger look pregnant. And while I’m sure those prints do look great on someone, I’m now so sick of them that I’m calling a tunic amnesty. Let’s have no more of these unflattering sacks. Let’s get back to dresses that flatter our figures rather than making random people in the street smile at us and ask us when the baby’s due. Whaddya say?

I think I could maybe have dealt with my current level of Tunic Hate just a little bit better if the trend hadn’t gone on for so damn long now. I thought winter would see the end of it, but no – it’s continuing well into Spring. I’m leaving for my honeymoon in less than a month now (have I mentioned that often enough yet, do you think) and can I buy myself any pretty, summer dresses? No. I cannot. I can buy tunics, tunics or… did you guess “tunics”? Correct!

Seriously, it’s all the shops seem to stock at the moment (in the UK, anyway. I’ve seen some lovely dresses on US websites, but will they ship here? Don’t be silly…). If you don’t like tunics? You’re pretty much screwed. Am I alone here? Or do you find yourself wanting to buy yourself one of these:

Black and lime print tunic: Dorothy Perkins
Circle Tunic Dress – just like granny used to wear! – Topshop
Yellow leaf tunic – Wallis

11 Comments

  • March 3, 2007

    Hilary

    FINALLY someone else notices this!!I HATE these stupid tunics. Topshop looks like a shrine to them at the moment.I can find nothing fitted that actually shows off my figure. Granted some people may want to hide their stomaches, but my waist and flat stomach are probably the best parts of my body and I don’t want to wear something that looks like it should hold potatoes.

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  • March 4, 2007

    connie

    The only good thing about tunic tops is that people will offer you to the front of the bathroom line up – even if you have the body of a twig! Yep, they make everyone look pregnant!

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  • March 9, 2007

    lialialia

    Aww. I am pregnant! I would think it’s a good look for pregnant lady, isn’t it?I should buy those tunics and start looking fashionable!
    But what do I wear underneath? -clueless-

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  • April 12, 2007

    mary

    Deep joy I’m not alone in this nightmare of vile,unflattering plain ugly obssesion with tunic wearing!!!all because miss sienna wears them in factory girl movie ok it was great in the 60’s film on her BUT ITS TAKING OVER!!!!I can’t find anything other than tunics,shift dresses in any shop across england ENOUGH IS ENOUGH

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  • April 17, 2007

    Icy

    The whole tunic thing is also big in Australia and has been for a while. They don’t work if you want to hide your tummy either, they just emphasise it. The gathered ones especially don’t work for anyone (unless you are actually pregnant, in which case you’ve got the most choice you’ve had in years.)

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  • April 26, 2007

    Kelli

    I hate a lot of the fashion today. You only see tunics or dresses. The trend, also, seems to be layering shirts. I hate that. I’m most comfortable in a pair of pants and a fitted blouse that has a normal length. Even the cute tunics are a mile long.

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  • August 5, 2007

    Cara

    Some people actually like tunics. Not the flashy ones with obnoxious patters… And not because they are trendy, no, not at all… but because some of us dress *gasp* modestly! It’s so hard to find anything that’s not a tank top, I am grateful anytime I can find a tunic… something I can wear over my jeans that won’t show off my ass or my arms or decolletage. I CAN understand however the frustration you’d have in tunics replacing clothes you like… I think there’s enough room for everything!

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  • November 16, 2007

    Az

    In Australia, all the clothing shops are flooded with these hideous pregnant/ children wear look too !!I can see the fat chicks are having a great time wearing them ,on top on another hedious fashion items : the leggings and the skinny jeans.
    Please, girls – stop buying them and put the trend to a rest , these are not flattering at all no matter how the retail people tells you they look cute on you.

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  • January 28, 2008

    racheycat

    lol, Kelli, it’s one thing to dress modestly, it’s entirely another to wear a tent over the whole of your torso. Blimey, wear a burqua if it means that much to you, but let the rest of us enjoy our bodies!

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  • June 9, 2008

    Me

    Yeaaah!
    I am not alone in this hate!

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  • May 5, 2009

    claudia

    please stop buying them

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