Monsoon isn’t a store The Fashion Police tend to frequent, but our officers happened to be in the area this week, and we found ourselves lingering longer than we’d expected over the new Monsoon Fusion collection for Spring 2012, so we figured we may as well show you, our Fashion Police jurors, some of it too. Well, it would be a crime to keep these things to ourselves, wouldn’t it, and we have pledged to fight fashion crime…
As some of you may know, Fusion is the younger, more affordable sister of the main Monsoon line, and this collection has a suitably “young”, girlish feel to it, which may not go down well with some of you. You’ll find lots of stripes, a smattering of cutesy animal prints, some bows and some dots, and this will either delight you or drive you insane, depending on your point of view.
Most of these pieces are available to buy now at Monsoon, with a couple due to arrive by the end of March. Take a look at the gallery below, and give us your verdict!
This Acne model got her feet snatched while modelling this attractive and edgy pair of sheer pants. Such a shame. Such a tragedy. Such a timely reminder of the dangers of trying to dress like a fashion victim, in see-through pants which are so long that we’re wondering if they make potential purchasers sign some kind of disclaimer promising not to sue them if they trip over them and break a leg.
As 2011 prepares to pack its fashionable bags and make way for its successor, we will remember the year just gone for…
1. The Blogger Bun
Sometimes it was small, and scraped back from the head, like a DIY facelift. And sometimes it was big, and messy, like a whole second head. The blogger bun reigned supreme throughout 2011: what will take over in 2012?
For the next in our series of Fashion Police inspired Halloween costume ideas, we present… The Fashion Criminal!
Now, we COULD give you a list of suggested items to use for this costume… or we could just direct you to our fashion crimes archive. Or to any street, in any city around the world, where you will find endless inspiration from the fashion criminals who pass you by. If you really need some ideas, though, the items which are arrested most often here at TFP include:
Drop-crotch pants: well, d’uh!
Crocs
If you don’t want to wear Crocs: peep toe boots, or almost anything by Jeffrey Campbell will do.
Sheer clothing without the appropriate undergarments.
Any item of clothing which is attached to any other item of clothing.
Or, of course, you could also choose to go for some classic Crimes of Fashion: socks with sandals, nude hose with open shoes, a visible thong protruding from the top of your too-small jeans… the opportunities are endless. If you can’t create the costume from your own closet – and we really hope you CAN’T – hit up the thrift store and purchase anything that doesn’t match and looks TERRIBLE. Add a pair of handcuffs, available almost anywhere at this time of year, and you’re done. And remember: we have a special amnesty on Crimes of Fashion on Halloween itself: wear any of your costume items before or after, however, and we just might arrest you…
Are you sick of reading the phrase “It’s almost Halloween!” yet? We are. It’s too bad, though, because we’re going to subject you to it a few more times this week, as we share with you some Halloween Costume ideas which will allow you to express your love of fashion – or your fear of it, if you prefer. After all, what could be scarier than some of the fashion trends we’ve showcased here over the years? We rest our case.
We’re kicking off with our personal favourite: The Fashion Blogger. It’s our favourite because, as fashion bloggers ourselves, let’s just say we didn’t have to look too far for our inspiration here… (Also, and for the avoidance of any doubt, please note that we’re not saying there’s anything wrong with wearing any of these items – well, except maybe the hipster glasses – just that they’re things we associate with fashion bloggers.)
You will need:
1. Hipster glasses. You will find these almost anywhere. If all else fails, head to the supermarket, buy a pair of those non-prescription reading glasses, and poke the lenses out. Remember that when it comes to hipster glasses, “The bigger, the better” should be your maxim.
2. A topknot Take the opposite approach to the hipster glasses: you want the topknot as small and tight as possible for true fashion blogger effect.
3. Macarons They’re the new cupcakes, dontchya know?
4. Fashion blogger clothes We’ve used a pair of trashed cutoffs to illustrate this part of the outfit, but really anything goes. Things you may want to consider include: colorblocking, layering, “arm parties”, Modcloth dresses – let your imagination run wild here.
5. Jeffrey Campbell ‘Lita’ boots If you actually ARE a fashion blogger, you’ll already own these. If you’re not, and you don’t want to buy them (and we don’t blame you: it would be like selling your soul to Satan, wouldn’t it?), any pair of super-clunky shoes will do.
6. Boyfriend-with-a-camera Your BFWAC should photograph you all night. If you can’t find someone willing to do this (and this time we don’t blame THEM), simply set up a tripod and pose in front of it: voila!
7. An iPhone Live-Tweet the entire party. Because it doesn’t count if it’s not recorded on the internet, you know?
Fashion Blogger Behaviour for Added Authenticity:
Just to make your Fashion Blogger Halloween Costume that little bit more realistic, you may want to adopt the following behaviourisms for the duration of your costume party:
1. Adopt a pigeon-toed stance at all times.
2. Tell anyone who will listen that your outfit is “remixed”.
3. And also “thrifted”.
4. Touch your hair, stare at your feet, or stare wistfully into space. Do this aaaaallll night.
Not even Jeffrey Campbell, Enemy of Feet, would think these were a good idea. NOT EVEN JEFFREY. And when Jeffrey Campbell would look at a shoe and think, “You know, I think these may be a little too ugly…” you know you’re in trouble.
These look like boats:
Sinister, terrifying boats. Like, if fashion was a horror movie, the bad guys would sail around inside giant versions of these shoes, wouldn’t they? And we’ll tell you what: THEY PROBABLY DO. This is what we’re up against, people. This is what the evil masterminds at the head of the Fashion Crime Ring are capable of. Are you scared? Because you should be.
Also: if they look this bad in the product shot, just imagine what they look like on feet! Oh, right: we don’t have to imagine it:
Yikes.
Flatforms: they just don’t need to exist, do they? (If you disagree, click here to buy them.)
A couple of years ago, we put together our directory of online clothing stores in the UK. Now we want to do the same for the US, but there’s just one problem: we need your help!
Not being US residents, we’re not quite as familiar with the online offerings across the ponds as we are with those in dear old Blighty. That’s where you come in. Leave us a comment with a link to your favourite online fashion shops in the United States, and our officers will check it out: simple!
There are just three rules:
1. The store must ship to the United States.
2. It must offer online shopping: so that fabulous little boutique around the corner doesn’t count unless it has an ecommerce website.
3. It must stock clothing of some kind.
Oh, and our spam filter sometimes overreacts when it sees lots of links being posted, so don’t worry if your comment doesn’t appear immediately: it’ll just have gone to the spam folder, and we’ll dig it out as soon as we can!
Speaking of spam, comments on this post will close in a couple of days, to prevent us getting spammed to death, so if you have some stores to share, speak now!
