Crimes Against Denim from Cheap Monday

Cheap Monday paint spatter jeans

[Buy them here]

Imagine, if you will, that you’re wearing your very favourite pair of black skinny jeans. OK, they’re starting to look a little bit grey and worn, but that’s OK, because it just makes them look even better. Some people actually PAY to buy brand new jeans that look like they’ve been worn to death, but you’re no fashion victim, so you’ve worn yours in the old-fashioned way: by actually, you know, wearing them. Some people still do that, apparently.

But we digress. There you are, wearing your favourite jeans, when – horror of horrors! – you spill a can of white paint ALL OVER THEM. (Don’t ask us what you were doing painting in your favourite jeans: we didn’t think that far ahead). OH NO. Quick pop quiz for you: do you…

a) Scream in horror, rip them off and throw them in the wash, in a desperate bid to save them?

b) Shrug your shoulders and accept your fate: they were old anyway, and you probably shouldn’t have worn them to paint in, should you?

c) Think, “OMG, SO FASHIONABLE!” and then rush to take a photo to post on Instagram. Because #edgy.

If you answered C, you’re probably going to love these Cheap Monday jeans. You might also like this look:

bad denim  by Cheap Monday

Well, SOMEONE has to like this look, surely? Our favourite bit is the giant tear right at the pocket: now THAT’S classy.

We’re fairly sure neither jacket nor jeans would pass the eBay test, and we also think that if you were to take these into a homeless shelter, say, as a donation, they’d probably turn you away – and be a little offended that you’d try to palm off such uselessĀ items on them. Only the privileged, after all, would actually see this kind of look as a fashion statement…

1 Comment

  • March 2, 2015


    To me they rather look as if I had tried to paint a pair of black bicycle shorts on my white jeans, but the colour was too runny.

    Whateva, do you really, really really believe that the people who wear that stuff like it? Is it not rather some kind of obstinacy, like some people, when you catch them lying, start to embellish their story more and more, thinking that at one point they will be believed?

    Or maybe it is a phenomenon which I would call the “Roman-cuisine-effect”: After the nobility of ancient Rome had eaten everything, brought delicacies from the whole known world to their tables, and nothing new and exciting was left to try and impress others with, they started to eat ever more nasty stuff: The Minerva pasty which was made from fish offal, only the tongues of peacocks pickled in jelly, dying goatfish (goatfish turn red when they die and were therefore killed at the table), sausages filled with brain and cartilage (these have unfortunately survived in the cuisine of northern Germany) and so on. I need not explain how this translates into fashion, I think – we have shown every piece of our bodies, used all materials for clothes including fish leather, metal mesh and cast plastics, have deformed especially the female body into every possible shape and have printed each and every foolishness on t-shirts. So what is left to us?

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