Frankenshoes: The Cora Nightwalker Boot by Sole Boutique

Lady Gaga has a lot to answer for, doesn’t she? She would totally wear these boots: and, thanks to her, so would an entire new generation of dressers who’re currently growing up with a motto of “What Would Gaga Do?” (WWGD)

(We reckon Victoria Beckham might wear them too, albeit she’d go for the standard black versions rather than this 70s swirl. After all, they’re not exactly the same as the Antonio Berardi boots VB wore a few years back, but they’re not exactly different either. And, actually, if we had to choose between them, in some kind of weird-boot face-off, we think these ones would probably win. At least they look like they have some kind of support for the heel.)

These are by Sole Boutique, and they’re called ‘Cora’. They’re also available in black (both patent and regular), although the “red zebra” version shown above is far more of an attention-getter. Well, red zebras always are, aren’t they? The full height is 8″, with the platform itself being 5″, which is actually higher than most stiletto heels, so if you’re a heel hater, these definitely aren’t going to be for you. And to be honest, if you’re a heel lover, well, these may not be for you either. They’re those kinda boots.

We have to admit, we’re really¬†curious¬†as to what it would feel like to actually wear these. We’d be a full 8″ taller than we are now, obviously, which would push even your short-ass Chief of Police into the 6″ bracket, and that would be quite something to experience. Then again, could we walk in them? We are, of course, professional heel-walkers, and have yet to meet a shoe we couldn’t tame, but these… we’re not so sure. Logic dictates that they must be easier to walk in than they look, but then logic also dictates that no-one in their right mind would want to wear harem pants, and we all know what happened THERE.

Kind of weird from the back, aren’t they?

What’s interesting about this, is that Sole Boutique also make shoes that look like this:

Now, we’re not necessarily saying these are any better or any worse than the shoes shown at the top of the page. That’s a matter of opinion. They ARE very different, though, no? What happened here, we wonder? What was the scene in the Sole Boutique workroom? Did one of the designers have too much coffee one day and think, “Screw it! I’m sick of making pretty little floral print pumps! Ima make shoes Lady Gaga would be proud off!”Or, alternatively, did one rogue designer figure out that s/he wasn’t REALLY a Frankenshoe kinda person, to be honest, and stay up nights trying to restore some balance to the world, using floral print as his medium?

We will never know, readers. We’d really like to, though.

Meanwhile, here’s what the first shoes look like on:

We would show you what the second pair look like on, too, but… you can all imagine a pair of floral pumps on feet, right? Right.

Both of these styles are available at Karmaloop. Click here to buy them.

5 Comments

  • June 20, 2011

    Kris

    I have actually tried these on (for fun of course, would never buy them) and they are pretty comfortable…as long as you well, dont try to walk in them. They are being sold here (in Serbia) as part of Bettie Page shoes by Ellie collection.

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  • June 20, 2011

    Monica

    I imagine what they were thinking was, “Hey, we could make some money doing knock-offs of those fall 2009 Nina Ricci shoes.”

    http://www.zimbio.com/Nina+Ricci/articles/23/Nina+Ricci+Fall+2009+Shoes

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  • June 20, 2011

    Heidi

    Why am I thinking about the tin can stilts of my childhood?

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  • June 21, 2011

    Ruth

    Did the designers just think “Hey, lets make shoes that cant be used as shoes!” Mad. And I just had a look on their website, and there are a lot more very ugly shoes on there!! Looks like they have 2 totally different designers..

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  • June 22, 2011

    April

    If I tried to STAND in those things I’d fall over, let alone trying to walk.

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