Crimes of Fashion

Fashion Fails

It’s been a while since we rounded up some potential fashion criminals for you, but the following crimes have been called in by our officers: as for whether they’re innocent and guilty, well, that’s for you to decide…

fashion fail

ZARA have a ton of great stuff in store right now, but we’re going to go out on a limb and say this dress isn’t one of them. We don’t think many people would look good in this one, but then again, its crimes suddenly don’t seem all that serious when we compare it to these frayed denim cullotes:

frayed denim culottes

So, it looks like frayed denim is going to be A Thing this season, huh? Seriously, though: the drawstring waist. The cut-off legs … which have been cut off right at the MOST unflattering part. The fraying, which makes these look more VICTIM than criminal… the list goes on, and so we will we: on to the next crime, to be exact…

what the hell even is this?

This ASOS kimono

They’re calling it a kimono, although it’s like no kimono we’ve ever known: or ever WANT to know, for that matter. What we would love to know about this one is where you’re supposed to wear it, though? The high lycra content and general “unitard” look of it suggests the gym, but… then there’s the cape. It’s true that it’s been a long time since we last had a gym membership, but have things really changed THAT much? Have gym goers swapped regular old workout gear for caped unitards? If so, that ALMOST makes us want to re-join the gym, just to see it. ALMOST.

As confusing as THAT crime is, however, we have to admit that this one has us completely stumped:

crime of fashion

“WHY?” is our main question here, we guess. Also, “WHERE?” And “HOW IS THAT COMFORTABLE?” Still, at least it outs the whole “frayed jeans” thing into perspective, doesn’t it?

frayed black jeans

Then again...

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