Good morning, Fashion Crime Fighters, and welcome to Fashion Crime Friday! We’re kicking things off this week with a little something known as the “tie dress”:
[Buy it here for $520]
The back view is the best bit, isn’t it? It’s hard to image how you’d be able to bend over – or even lean forward slightly – in this without showing the world your underwear, but perhaps that’s all part of the “edgy” fun. We’d understand this a little better if it was a tunic rather than a dress – a tunic that’s been shredded, and then knotted – because at least that would eliminate the “knickers” issues, but… actually, no, we’re lying: we wouldn’t understand it at all. Because it’s a $520 denim shirt with knots tied in it. It stands to reason, however, that where there’s a tie skirt, there must also be some “tie pants”, and sure enough…
[Buy them here for $350]
Suspect # 2 | Tie Pants
At least you won’t have the underwear issue with these. There IS that in their favour. Then again, that twisted crotch makes it look to us like anyone wearing these would literally have their knickers in a twist, so perhaps you’d just be exchanging one underwear issue for another? We hope never to have to find out.
Next up, a “curtains” dress from a brand we usually love:
[Buy it here for £3,815]
Suspect # 3 | Curtains dress
Dolce & Gabbana, we expect better from you. Although this would ALSO make a fairly decent rich-person’s Halloween costume.
Finally, a possible act of daylight robbery:
[Buy them here for £840]
Suspect # 4 | Suspicious Sunnies
They’re £840. Is it just us, or is that a LOT of money for a pair of novelty sunglasses?
That’s all for now, folks: have a great weekend, and don’t forget to follow us on these networks: