Crimes of Fashion, Shirts & Tops

Ugly shirts arrested by Fashion Police

Late last night  Fashion Police officers, acting on an anonymous tip-off, conducted a raid on a website believed to be harbouring a secret crime ring of ugly shirts.

It started off innocently enough:

white turtleneck sweater with blue  heart

Well, OK, maybe “innocent” is the wrong word here. It’s also possible this just looks innocent to us NOW, in light of what came afterwards. Because let’s face it: this shirt looks like it lost its own arms in some horrible accident (perhaps the blue heart killed them?), and had to have them replaced with these bad prosthetics. It’s nothing, however, compared to this:

ugly shirts including black and white stripe short with puff sleeves

We don’t know about you, but this is one take on the monochrome trend we WON’T be adopting this season. Or not unless we become victim to some strange kind of shoulder-inflating disease, and this shirt is suddenly the only thing that’ll fit. And maybe not even THEN,  if we’re completely honest. If you love it, though, there are some other variations available too:

black and white shirt with puff sleeves

Think THOSE are ugly shirts? Oh, honey. We haven’t even STARTED to talk about ugly shirts. For instance:

top with slashed front

We’ve christened this one The Nip-Slip Top. Because if ever there was a nip-slip waiting to happen, this would be it. In fact, the existence of this top is probably the only thing in the world that could possibly justify the existence of THIS top:

white t-shirt with black hood

We’re not sure if this is designed for those who wore the one above, and now want to hide their head in shame, or for those who fear they may be exposed (literally) to the sight of someone ELSE in the Nip-Slip Top, but…

…OK, we’re kidding: although it appears at first that this is a t-shirt with a hood that covers your face as well as your head, if you look really carefully you’ll see that it’s just a plain old t-shirt with a hood, perfect for those pesky bad hair days! And in comparison to the one above, it actually seems pretty “normal”, really…

Do you think these are ugly shirts, or just unusual ones? Should we arrest them… or set them free?

(Find all the items pictured here.)

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