March, 2013

Happy Easter from The Fashion Police!

It might not feel much like Springtime, but the Easter weekend is upon us, and The Fashion Police are taking a couple of days off to rest, recuperate – and probably get our Spring/Summer clothes out of storage, even although that’s just a little bit optimistic of us right now. Whether you’re celebrating the holiday, enjoying the long weekend, or just getting on with business as usual, we hope you have fun doing it, and we’ll see you back here on Tuesday, with more crimes of fashion and style sleuthing. Happy Easter! Image: Stock.xchng | Banner image: © Cenorman | Dreamstime Stock Photos &Stock Free Images

backhanded compliments

Five clothing compliments we’d rather not hear

Much has been written on the subject of how to gracefully receive compliments. The art of gracefully GIVING a compliment is just as important, though, and sometimes we think it’s an art that’s in danger of being lost. Here are five types of commonly-heard clothing-related “compliments” that aren’t really compliments at all… What they say: That’s such a brave choice! What they mean: It’s brave because people are probably going to laugh in your face as soon as they lay eyes on it. Unless you’re that special breed of fashionista who prides herself on being edgy and frets about whether she’s taking enough “risks” with her clothing choices, you probably don’t want to be praised for your “bravery” in getting…

blue tea dress

DOTD: Topshop branch floral tea dress

Topshop branch floral tea dress, £46 Ah, the floral tea dress! Considered a summer classic by many, one of the great things about these dresses is that they can look just as good layered up with tights, boots and cardis as they can with bare legs and sandals: a good thing for those of us who live in the UK, and don’t normally get to experience “summer”. We couldn’t decide which colour to show you, so we decided just to go with both. One word of warning, though: these seem to be proving popular, and not all sizes are available, so if you can’t find yours online, you may need to check in-store. Buy them

how to dress up

How to Dress Up…without feeling looked down on

Wondering how to dress up to your heart’s desire, without having to answer endless questions about where you’re going, and whether you have a job interview? Here at The Fashion Police we’ve talked about how dressing up is not a crime of fashion (despite what some people would have you believe), and we’ve also talked about HOW to dress up, if you want/need to. But what about those of you who’d like to smarten up your look, but who are too afraid to ditch the jeans and sweaters because you know you’ll be looked down upon, or even just stared at, by people who consider a simple cotton sun-dress to be the most outrageously over-dressed item in existence? How do you start dressing…

stripe ballgown

DOTD: Oscar de la Renta striped silk-blend gazar gown

Oscar de la Renta striped silk-blend gazar gown, $6,790 We don’t tend to feature floor-length gowns here at Dress of the Day, purely because, as pretty as they can be, we just can’t imagine ever having to wear one. Obviously this doesn’t stop us from featuring lots of OTHER totally impractical dresses here, of course, but somehow we can always imagine finding SOME excuse to wear a shorter dress, but long ones? Not so much. Sadly the lifestyle of a Fashion Police officer just doesn’t provide many opportunities for formal evening-wear. (This is also why we’re always puzzled by the deluge of “Get the Oscars look!” press releases we et after the Academy Awards every year, in which various brands try…

Fashion Confessions: I bought a smock

Fashion Confessions: I Bought a Smock

In the first of a new series, Fashion Police editor Amber McNaught shares some of her adventures in the fashion wilderness, starting with a confession which might shed some light on the reasons behind The Fashion Police’s hatred of smocks… (…but it wasn’t this smock.) Fashion Confessions # 1: I bought a smock. Oh, don’t worry: it wasn’t recent. And it wasn’t the smock in the photo, either (although it wasn’t all that different from it, if the truth be told…).  Actually, I was about 16 at the time, and the smock in question was beige (yes, beige), voluminous, and it quite possibly had some kind of Peter Pan collar, too, if memory serves. However ugly you’re imagining that smock…

how to survive a shopping ban

How to Survive a Shopping Ban

Shopping rocks: you can trust us when we say that no one knows that better than us. But as much as we love to shop, sometimes there comes a time when shopping for fashion has to take a back seat to some of the other, arguably more important things in life. Whether you’re putting yourself through college, starting a family, or saving up for that house, holiday or pension fund, every now and then there comes a time when a shopping ban starts to seem like a good idea. But how on earth do you survive one? How does a fashion-obsessed shopping addict get through a shopping ban without breaking down and hitting the shops hard? Well, we can’t promise…

blue J Crew dress

DOTD: J Crew printed silk and cotton-blend dress

J Crew printed silk and cotton-blend dress, £500 Our thought process with this one was as follows: Oooh! Pretty dress! Lovely, simple shape! Love that sky blue colour: would look so great with green, or even red! Ooh! Parrot print! Oh, J Crew, awesome: let’s check the price! £500? FIVE HUNDRED POUNDS?! “…” In its defence, it is silk. (Partly silk, anyway. Silk blend.) And is IS pretty. Would you pay £500 for it, though? If you would, you can get it here.

sneering model in see-through top

Shocking smocking: ugly dresses and other crimes of fashion

We begin our weekly crimes of fashion roundup with a public service announcement on the subject of ugly dresses, specifically, SMOCKS. Smocks look good on no one. We don’t often make such blanket assertions, it’s true: normally we try to couch our proclamations of fashion crimes in the language of “some people look fantastic in them!” and “if you love them, wear them: you go, girl!” Not today. No, today we’re going to have the courage of our convictions, and say it again: smocks look good on no-one. Case in point: Ugly dresses, or totes adorbs? Find them here and here. Two gorgeous models. In smocks. And while the models look cute as little buttons, that’s because… the models are cute as…

Dorothy Perkins laser cut flowers top

High Street Hero: Dorothy Perkins laser cut flowers top

Dorothy Perkins laser cut flowers top, £32 An intricate, laser cut top isn’t something you generally find in the £30-or-thereabouts price bracket, so when we saw this one at Dorothy Perkins, we decided to nominate it as a High Street Hero. What’s a High Street Hero? It’s one of those items you find on the high street (Well, d’uh), which stand out from the crowd for one reason or another: either they look more expensive than they are, they’re the kind of quality you don’t always find from the price…or you just really like the look of them. This top falls into the third category for us. We haven’t seen it in the “flesh”, so we can’t speak to the…

polka dot dress with bow

DOTD: Helene Berman polka dot shift dress

Helene Berman polka dot shift dress, £159.99 We need a polka dot intervention. Actually, you know what? We don’t. Because there’s no crime in loving a certain look, print or style, and  one of our big loves is for all things dotty, so we may as well indulge it while the shops are full of spots. Our latest fixation is this Helene Berman shift dress, which combines the playful print with a classic, shift dress shape, plus a dinky little bow at the waist. Although polka dots work (for us) in just about any combo they come in, this black and white version is a particularly versatile one, as it will serve as a more-or-less blank canvas for whatever other…

Follow The Fashion Police…

As we’re sure you know by now, Google Reader will be closing down this July. Here are some other ways to follow The Fashion Police, and make sure you never miss another crime of fashion… Twitter: A link to each of our new posts is automatically posted to our Twitter account, which you’ll find here. Because of the high level of abuse we get on Twitter from lovely people who think we’re Joan Rivers or Kelly Osbourne (despite the disclaimer on the profile), this account is unmonitored, so if you’d like to contact us on Twitter, rather than simply getting notifications of new posts, you can follow our editor here. Facebook: Again, each new post is automatically published to our…

Top Ten: bird print pieces on the high street

Oriental birdcage top, £30, Oasis Bird print: like florals, it comes around every spring. Also like florals, it’s fresh, feminine, and a pretty obvious choice for things like sundresses and skirts. (It’s probably worth noting here that many bird prints actually contain florals as part of the design, hence the similarities). This is also a rather more whimsical, quirky kind of print than its floral sister, though, so if you like to be able to use those particular words to describe what you’re wearing, it might just be for you. We’ve tracked down ten bird print pieces, all available now on the UK high street. These range from cute tops and simple scarves to bird print dresses and skirts: take…

blue lace dress

Dress(es) of the Day: Three blue lace dresses

We couldn’t decide which of these three blue lace dresses was most deserving of the title Dress of the Day, so we thought we’d just show you all of them, and let YOU be the judge of that one. We’re starting off with the most expensive dress (Might as well get it out of the way, huh?) which is this £355 Collette by Collette Dinnigan number, available at Net-a-Porter: This was the first dress we bookmarked in this style, and we liked it, not just for the brilliant blue colour, but for the cute little grossgrain belt, and the shawl effect shoulders, which give it something of a vintage feel. £355 is far too much for this Fashion Police Officer, however,…

How much would you pay for…the perfect jeans?

The perfect jeans: they’re one of the Holy Grails of fashion, and they’re almost as difficult to find, too. In fact, if we were given the choice between a quest for the Grail, and a quest for the perfect jeans, we’d probably choose the former. Well, at least we’d get to see a bit of the world that way: when you’re searching for a new pair of jeans, all you get to see is the inside of a lot of sweaty changing rooms. Given the difficulty of the task at hand, then, today we begin a short series of polls in which we aim to find out just how much you typically spend on those so-called “basics”. Of course, this…

H&M Conscious Collection

GALLERY: H&M Conscious Collection Partywear

Instead of our usual Dress of the Day column, today we thought we’d bring you a whole lot of dresses of the day. Plus some trousers, shoes, bags and accessories of the day, too. These are all part of the new H&M Conscious Collection, and we have to say, we’re pretty darn impressed. Sure, there are a few pieces of coal amongst the diamonds, but we think the good stuff more than makes up for the bad, and for the first time in a long time, we’re really excited about a new high street collection. Imagine that! As you probably know, the H&M Conscious Collection is H&M’s attempt to rid themselves of their “fast fashion” image (to some extent, anyway),…

fringe shorts

Style Trial: Fringe shorts and jacket

Fringe. It’s one of those “love it or hate it” kinda things. If it’s done right, it can be dramatic and statement-making (what the statement IS, exactly, is for you to decide). But when it’s done wrong… [Jacket |Shorts] …you get an ombre, fringe shorts-suit. Even if you’re one of those people who has the innate ability to look good in pretty much anything, and to pull things like this off, you’re still going to look like fashion threw up all over you. It’s a trend salad, isn’t it? And it’s one that’ll have a good chance of making you look like an Afghan Hound. We’re not even sure why we think that, to honest, because Afghan Hounds aren’t ombre…

baroque print full-skirted dress

Dress of the Day: Ted Baker Punitee baroque print dress

Ted Baker dress, £249 We’d happily pack our bags and go and live inside the Ted Baker website right now. Seriously. There are just SO MANY DRESSES to choose from, all of which fit seamlessly into our Dress of the Day theme of vaguely retro-inspired loveliness. Actually, we’d intended to show you another dress as today’s pick, but by the time we got round to writing this post it had sold out, so you get this one instead. You also get a heads-up that this probably won’t be the last time you’ll be seeing this particular brand featured here, so if you want to either buy this one, or nominate another, click here to take a look!

shocked woman

Ten fashion trends we hate right now…

… and by “we”, we mean “you”. Last week we asked our Twitter friends which fashion trends they wish would roll over and die already. Here’s what they said: 1. Adult Onesies Can we just pause for a minute to say how happy we are to know that it’s NOT JUST US who hates the adult onesies thing? We know they’re “so comfy!” (When you’re using the same argument people commonly use to defend Crocs, though, it’s probably not going to convince us…), and yes, they DO allow you to dress up like a fluffy-wuffy bunny wabbit, but we’re still pretty perplexed by their ongoing popularity.  People, you CAN be comfortable without dressing like a giant toddler. No, really, you…

white floral shift dress

Dress of the Day: French Connection ‘Summer in Eden’ dress

French Connection ‘Summer in Eden’ dress, £120 If you read our article on  “Spring Staples’ last week, you probably gathered that we’re big fans of the current French Connection collection. These clothes may not be the most exciting pieces you’ll find, but they’re the kind of simple, stylish basics that SHOULD be really easy to find, but which somehow AREN’T. (Why IS that, we wonder? Why is always easy to find a pair of leopard -print harem pants, say, while the perfect black cardigan or perfectly fitting pair of jeans remain elusive? One of life’s great mysteries, we guess…) And no, we’re not being paid to say that, we promise: just giving credit where it’s due! We showed you a few…