Crimes of Fashion, Trousers/Pants

Harry Halim and the Mysterious Case of the Too Long Pants

How can you tell if your long pants are a little TOO long?

Oh, probably when you discover you can actually clean the floors with them, we’d say…

Now, we know that dastardly fashion criminal, The Foot Snatcher, gets a lot of support here from those of you who feel that there’s nothing wrong with pants so long they scrape the floor. We’re not going to argue with you about that now, but seriously: how would you even walk in these without constantly standing on them and tripping over? How filthy would they be by  the end of the day, having been dragged around the city streets, and over God knows what?

(On the plus side, the streets in question would be clean. Maybe you could get some kind of government subsidy to allow to you to buy the trousers, on the understanding that you’d really be performing a public service by wearing them?)

Now that we’ve answered the “How do you know when your pants are too long,” question, we have one more for you:

How do you know when your pants are too expensive?

The answer to this one is relative, of course. But we’d venture to suggest that when your pants are £1010/ $1,800, they’re probably too expensive, no matter WHAT they look like…

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