Brown – sorry, “latte” – isn’t generally the first colour we think of when we go looking for a party dress, but we’d be willing to make an exception for this knife pleat dress from Oasis, which combines a gorgeous design with an unusual colour, which would work perfectly with gold accessories/shoes, and with a host of other colours, too. (We’re quite partial to brown with pale blue, ourselves…)
Is it Innocent or Guilty of committing crimes of fashion, though?
Behold the red skater skirt! Not exactly a hot trend item – well, you know, it’s a red skirt: they’ve been around forever, and they’ll probably be around forever more. There are a few more of them around than usual this summer, though, probably because of the whole 50s vibe that’s going on in fashion right now, and which has seen the swirly skirt rise to prominence once more, whether attached to dresses, or on its own.
Skirts like these are available in lots of different colours at the moment. We particularly like them in red, though, because they have a very classic feel that’s just begging to be work with something like a striped sweater or knotted white shirt, and a simple pair of ballet flats. So the two skirts above get the Fashion Police thumbs up: the only question remaining is, which one would we buy?
The question is, of course, a strictly hypothetical one, obviously. Sadly, a police officer’s salary doesn’t stretch to £910 – or £910 anything else’s, to be completely honest – so while we have no hesitation in saying that the Preen skirt shown on the left of the image above (click here to buy it from Far Fetch) is definitely the nicer of the two, with better quality fabric (at least, as far as we can tell from the image), and a higher waist, which can be more flattering to the figure with this particular style of skirt.
The River Island skirt, meanwhile (click here to buy it, although be aware that it’s sold out in many sizes, so you may have to look for it in-store instead) is made from good ol’ polyester, which accounts for the much lower price, but would be easy to throw on with a t-shirt and sandals for a cool summer look.
Does the low price make it more attractive to you, though? Well, actually, if we had to choose, we wouldn’t buy either of these. Nope, we’d actually buy this version of the River Island skirt, which is the midi-length version:
At £34.99, this one’s just a little more expensive than its shorter sister, but as well as creating a more 50s-inspired shape, the longer length is also more to our personal tastes, too, and we have to give props to River Island here for being one of the few brands around at the moment to recognise that one hem length does not suit all, and make at least some of its items available in two different lengths. (ASOS can take a bow for this too, although they don’t do it quite often enough for our liking!).
But we digress. Back to the issue at hand. If you were in the market for a red, skater-style skirt, which one of these would you go for, do you think. Would you SAVE or SPLURGE?
We’re big on the colour green here at The Fashion Police. You may well have noticed this.
As soon as we spotted this Oscar de la Renta dress at Net-a-Porter, then, there was just no way it wasn’t going to become a Dress of the Day. It’s the colour that has the most impact, of course, but the petal collar is also very sweet, and the belted waist and pencil skirt give it a bit of a Joan Holloway feel, which is always fine by us, and makes it perfect for the office, or as formal(ish) daywear in general.
What’s not so fine by us? The price. This is £1,140 (you can click here to buy it if that doesn’t phase you) so, fo us at least, it will remain a dream dress in the truest sense of that phrase.
What do you think: Innocent or Guilty of committing crimes of fashion?
The Fashion Police always look forward to Haute Couture Week in general, and to the Christian Dior show in particular, as it never fails to be a visual extravaganza. This time around we were more than usually interested to see how Dior is faring without John Galliano. This collection was designed by Bill Gaytten, who we think managed to retain the Dior feel, while creating something of his own. The big skirts and nipped-in waists are still there (as are the “shresses”) and there are also some rather amazing hats to feast your eyes on.
Either Halloween has come early this year, or April Fools has arrived late. We say this because a) When else would you find yourself in need of a sequined skeleton suit but Halloween? and b) $2000? For THIS? You have GOT to be kidding us. And OK, sure, we get that it’s sequined, which is probably painstaking work and which, for some brands, i a great excuse to hike up the price. And we also get that it could be a humorous thing to wear. But at the same time, we reckon these three words say it all:
SEQUINED
SKELETON
SUIT
Well, it’s certainly scary, we’ll give it that. Almost as scary as THIS, in fact:
That’s right, it;s a skirt that’s been made to look like our old enemy, the harem pants. Because nothing says “Whoops, I just filled my adult diaper!” than a saggy crotch, does it? The special sadness of this item is that while it wouldn’t exactly have been a stunning skirt, it would’ve at least looked better than harem pants… if they’d only just managed to resist the impulse to attach it awkwardly at the ankle:
It’s half skirt, half harem. Tragic. And puzzling.
You know, we quite like the look of thigh-high boots worn over skinny jeans, too, John Richmond. Only when they’re ACTUAL boots, though. These ones? Aren’t? Boots, that is. No, they’re just boot legs. And they’re attached to the jeans. Why would you even…? How would you…? Yeah. A stuck-together-clothes crime if ever we saw one.
Now, we daresay you could use some creative belting to make this look a little bit better than it does at the moment, but if you’re a Fashion Police regular, you know the rules: if you can use the word “sack” to describe an item of clothing, it’s probably a crime of fashion. This particular one is also an unsolved mystery, because despite looking like it belongs in the wardrobe department of Little House on the Prairie, it’s sold out in all sizes. Would you pay £200 for this? Only if you were comfortable being asked when you’re due, we guess…
We’re actually in two minds about this dress. Even although it makes the model look like a midget who ripped a page out of a magazine and wrapped it around herself (or perhaps just an average-sized person, with a giant magazine?), we don’t hate it. Then again, we don’t generally want people to come up to us and try to READ our clothes while we’re wearing them, and you just know that’s what would happen. Admit it, you want to know what it says, don’t you? Here you go:
So what do you think? Would you wear any of these? Which do you think is the worst offender?
Betty Draper would be ALL OVER this dress, wouldn’t she? And we would too, to be perfectly honest with you. In fact, we’re kind of kicking ourselves for breaking one of our golden rules – Thou Shalt Not Visit The Dollydagger Website Unless Thou Art Prepared to Spend A Lot of Money – and allowing About Your Dress to seduce us into clicking the link to this, because even although we have nowhere to wear it, and are about £100 short of the £130 we’d need to buy it, it’s going to haunt us forever now.
This is from Dollydagger’s own Boutique Collection, and is in that classic 50s style which is currently very much in fashion, but which never really goes out of it. It’ll be much too flowery and feminine for some tastes, but if you like your dresses big, beautiful, and with a bit of retro flair to them, you’re probably drooling on your screen right now. We’ll give you a moment to clean yourselves up before we continue.
As we mentioned, this is £130, and if you’re stuck for places to wear it, we’d suggest tucking it away until the next time you’re invited to a summer wedding – or are even asked to be a bridesmaid at one.
As some of you may know, The Fashion Police is a UK-based website, so we don’t celebrate the 4th of July. It would appear that many of our UK-based retailers DO, though, because over the past few weeks, we’ve been finding quite a few examples of Stars and Stripes patterned clothing on some of our favourite websites.
Where would you wear THIS little number, for instance?
Even if we were planning to celebrate the 4th (And ASOS does deliver to the US now, so perhaps that’s why they’re stocking this), we can’t really imagine wanting to do it in a strapless, sequined dress, emblazoned with the stars n’ bars, can you?
Or, for that matter, in these, which we found at Topshop, where they’re selling for £34, and are sold out in UK sizes 4 and 12:
These are getting rave reviews at the Topshop website, where they’re being declared a “must have” and a “summer essential”, so perhaps it’s just us who have an American-flag shaped hole in our wardrobes right now.
(Aside: we’re really loving Topshop’s new review function – great for helping you work out whether items are true to size, and what the fabric’s like if you’re ordering online without having seen the item in-store.)
Not to be outdone, New Look has a US flag top, which is only £9.99, although sold-out online: you may have better luck in-store, though.
(We can’t help but imagine this top worn with the shorts above it, now. Now THAT would be quite some outfit…)
Oh, and if you can’t find it in-store, don’t despair: Dorothy Perkins have an American flag shirt which is £18, and in stock. You’re welcome.
Across the pond, good ol’ Jeffrey Campbell steps up to the plate with these stars and stripes print Litas:
For some reason, Far Fetch is describing this is an “English flag”. England’s flag is the George’s Cross, which doesn’t have a single star to its name (or, indeed, any blue), so we’re going to assume they’re just confused with that. Either that or we are.
So, tell us, readers, what do you think of flags becoming fashion statements? Patriotic? Fun? OK if it’s your own flag, a bit weird if it’s someone else’s? And will you be wearing the Stars and Stripes on the fourth of July, or have all of these retailers started selling these items for some other reason altogether?
(Oh, and happy 4th of July, to those who celebrate it! How we wish we could join you in a day off…)
