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Archive for November, 2009


ysl-leather-jumpsuit

One of the great unsolved myseries of the universe: how can something described as a “leather jumpsuit” be so completely and utterly unsexy? This one by Yves Saint Laurent is actually the anti-sexy AND it costs £2,543.  Buy it if you will – but be aware that one day the Village People may just arrive at your door and ask for their jumpuit back…

Annarita Celano shress, £25

Annarita Celano shress, £225

Sheer dresses – or “shresses” as the fashion world dubbed them shortly after they started to appear on the runways. How we laughed at them! Soon, however, it was the SHRESSES that were having the last laugh, because rather than disspear almost immediately, as we felt sure they would, the shresses went forth and multipied, and pretty soon they were popping up all over the place. In fact, we had to inagurate a whole new wing of the Fashion Police jail for them, so we could keep them away from the other inmates. (Shresses are a bad influence on other clothes, you see. You don’t even want to KNOW what happened when one briefly shared a cell with harem pants…)

The one saving grace of the shress, of course, is that we still haven’t seen anyone wearing one in “real” life, and for that we will be forver grateful. That doesn’t mean we can’t still have a good ol’ laugh at them, though, so here, for your viewing pleasure (or displeasure, as the case may be) are some of the current crop of shresses occupying our jail…

All shresses: Yoox.com

Monday, November 30th, 2009

Holey clothes! LnA Ripped V Tee

"It's 'edgy', OK?"

"It's 'edgy', OK?"

On the plus side, this only costs £24.11, which isn’t TOO extortionate. (Although it WAS £40. Yes.)

On the minus side, however: £24?! For something that looks like THIS? And people are willingly going out and spending money on a brand-new-but-looks-old pre-ripped t-shirt? So they can look, like, really cool and edgy and be all, “Oh, hai, I totally just pulled this out of the dumpster this morning! No, of course I didn’t go and buy a brand, spanking new t-shirt that looks like I’ve had it for ever? Do I look stupid?”

Umm, well, you DID ask…

Would you pay for a t-shirt that looks like this, readers? Your answers to this are important: we have a bunch of ancient white t-shirts burning a hole in our closet, you see, and we’re thinking scissiors, eBay, hello easy money! What do you think?

LnA Ripped V Tee, £24.11

green-ruffle-dressWell, it’s certainly starting to feel a lot like Christmas, isn’t it?

For instance, here’s one of the decorations! Well, it looks like one, anyway. We can’t quite make our minds up about this dress, though. It feels like it COULD be stunning… if it had just a few less ruffles. Or, OK, maybe a LOT less ruffles. We can’t help feeling that a head poking out of that neckline would end up looking like some kind of grown-up Cabbage Patch Kid, although perhaps the black version would be a little better in that respect.

What do you think, readers? Crime of Fashion?

[Product Page]

Rihanna arrives at Letterman

We know many of our US readers are out shopping up a storm today, and we have some storm-like shopping to do ourselves, so we’re going to give ourselves the day off from fashion-policing. Don’t worry, we’ll be back as usual on Monday – until then, here are some links to keep you going…

Shoeperwoman spots Rihanna in Alexander McQueen’s dogtooth shoe boots.

Dollface drools over crystal-capped nail polish.

Keeping It Realtor is starting to get into the Christmas spirit.

The Grumpy Old Bloggers wonder just what part of Katie Price is “genuine”?

And Forever Amber has an uninvited guest.

just-cavalli-pink-corset-dr

Pink satin corset dress, £335, Just Cavalli

jean-paul-gaultier-dress

We’d perhaps be able to understand this dress a little better if it was a beach cover-up, say.  That doesn’t mean we’d be able to forgive it, mind you – it’s not like it’s actually going to cover anything up, after all, which kinda defeats the purpose – but we would at least have some small inkling of why it came to exist.

A £570 / $945 beach cover-up, though? We don’t think so. And when you consider that £570 is the SALE price, and it was originally retailing for £760/$1,260, it all becomes even more baffling.

Why does it exist? Who would buy it? We’re stumped, readers, so if you can step in with the answers to these questions, we’d be grateful.

If you just want to step in and buy it, meanwhile, it’s available from Yoox.com

jeffrey-cambell-tick-wedges

Peep toe boots AND a heavy metal sole? These definitely won’t be going onto our Christmas list anytime soon, but they HAVE gone onto someone’s, because they’ve already sold out twice on pre-order, and they’re not even available yet!

They’re by Jeffrey Campbell, they’re called ‘Tick’, and we fully expect that some people will love them just as much as we loathe them. If you’re one of those people, pre-order round 3 is now available at SoleStruck, where these will cost you $169.95. What do you think of them?

 

crimes-of-fashion

GULP.

Where to start with this one? Where to start? Any one of these items (except maybe the shoes) would’ve been bad enough on its own, but to cram all of them together on the same model like this: well, it just seems like a flagrant attempt to get her arrested, doesn’t it?

So far, we count four separate crimes and misdemeanours:

1. Visible bra

2. See-through top

3. Shoulder pads. Visible ones.

4. Leggings worn as pants.

Even this list, though, doesn’t really capture the magnitude of FUG that is this outfit. What were you thinking, MyCatwalk? WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?





 
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