There must be lots of monochrome dresses out there that just wouldn’t do it for us, but this isn’t one of them. It’s by Temperley London, and is a very simple design, made striking by the contrasting black and white, and prettied up by the corsage detail at the bust. It’s also in a silk jersey fabric, which should make it easy and comfortable to wear – something that you don’t always get from a fabulous dress!
Needless to say, this isn’t cheap, but if you love it, you can buy it from Net-a-Porter for £550.
You know when a dog injures its head, or ear, or something, and the vet puts one of those plastic cones around its neck to stop it scratching the wound? That's what these Karl Lagerfeld sandals reminds us off. So they'd be really handy if you hurt your ankle, and wanted to stop yourself from scratching it, we guess. Or if you wanted to pretend to be a carthorse, with giant fetlocks.
Other than that… we're not keen. Sorry, Kaiser Karl. What about you, though, readers? Does this work for you? If so, you can buy these for 390 euros at Colette.
So not the kind of thing we expected to pop up in ASOS.com's 'just in' section. In fact, for a moment there we thought we'd stumbled onto a different kind of website altogether. However, this is, indeed, being sold by ASOS.com, so we must assume it's part of the current wet-look/Lady-Gaga-inspired fashion we've been seeing a lot of. What we want to know is: has that whole look just gone too far now? If you don't think it has, and you want to buy this, it's £58 and you'll get it here.
Just indulge us for a moment with this one, if you don’t mind…
Yes, we know it’s got a huge bow on the front, which will be enough to have many of you screaming in horror and running for the hills, but hey, it’s cute and cheerful, and that works for us.
If it works for you, too, it’s by Ted Baker, and it’s £79 from ASOS.com.
As we're sure you all know, many of our celebrity friends and fashion criminals are in Cannes at the moment, for the International Film Festival. Here's a quick look at what they've been wearing, kicking off with Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie (above), at the Inglourious Basterds premiere. Angelina went for her trademark long, pale gown, this time, as opposed to her trademark long, black gown. Quite a bit of leg on show, too: saucy!
Look, this model is pretending to be a sailor! "Aye, aye, capt'n!", she's saying. "Shiver me timbers!" Or something.
And, with the help of our trusty Dress of the Day, you can now pretend to be a sailor too! You can do this for only £10, too, because that's all this dress will cost you. We think that's a bit of a bargain: if you do, too, head over to Blue Banana to buy it.
Love music? Love handbags? Well, this isn't quite the perfect marriage of the two, because it's a backpack rather than a handbag, but it'll still hold all your stuff AND make you look like a wandering minstrel, and who doesn't want that?
The bag is by Pratesi, and it has a built-in mini-speaker you can connect your MP3 player to, to try and make people think you're actually playing music. (Don't do that while the Chief of Police is around though, because she hates that. Oh for the days when personal music players were actually "personal" and music didn't have to be "shared" at all times!)
It's $398, and you if you like it, you can buy it here.
![Spl101835 033[1] Celebrity Fashion Roundup: Cannes edition](http://www.thefashionpolice.net/images/6a00d8341c873353ef01156fa7d206970c.jpg "Spl101835_033[1]")
