Crimes of Fashion, Trousers/Pants

Stella McCartney is offical designer of Fashion Police prison uniforms


  For a long time now, one question has plagued and troubled us: what kind of uniform should we make the inmates of the Fashion Police jail wear?

At first we thought we'd keep it simple and make a combination of Crocs and harem pants our official uniform. Then we realised some of our prisoners would probably actually enjoy that, and the jail is supposed to be a place of punishment and correction, so we were thrilled to find that Stella McCartney has done the hard work for us, and designed an outfit that's just perfect for our purposes.

Yes, these Stella McCartney dungarees are the kind of outfit that will give no pleasure to anyone. A combination of your grandpa's old pyjamas and a boiler suit, they're functional-but-grim all the way, with the power to make even a model look completely shapeless. Exactly the kind of uniform our prisoners should wear, then, because surely these alone would deter people from committing fashion crimes in the first place?

We'd order in a job lot, but the problem is they're £380 each, which is a clear case of Daylight Robbery. Looks like we're going to have to arrest Stella McCartney instead…

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