Crimes of Fashion, Knitwear

River Island top mauled by vicious dogs, Fashion Police investigating


  Our Police Dog once did this to one of the Chief's sweaters. Oh, what a terrible day that was: it lives in infamy.

Now it would seem the same fate has befallen this orange top from River Island. Poor thing: we have no idea what it did to deserve this, but we can only commend its bravery, because despite having sustained horrific injuries in the attack,by an unknown assailant, it is still offering itself up  for sale, for the price of £29.99. Good on you, brave top! Just because you've been ripped to shreds, it doesn't make you any less of a top, you know? We applaud you. Just don't ask us to actually wear you, because we're afraid the answer to that one would have to be "no".

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