March, 2009

      Dress of the Day: Fornarina Crochet Frill Sleeve Mini Dress

        Proof that crochet can, indeed, be cute! Not that we ever doubted it, you understand, but seriously, if you’d seen some of the things in the “crochet” wing of the Fashion Police jail… Truth be told, we’d probably like this Fornarina dress even more in some other fabric, but we’re suckers for navy/red/white combinations at the moment, and think this has a pretty little nautical look to it that’s just perfect for summer.  If you think so too, it’s £85 from ASOS.

      Carrie’s ‘Sex and the City’ wedding dress is an instant sell-out at Net-a-Porter

        This Vivienne Westwood dress is actually a three-quarter length version of the full-length gown Carrie wore in the Sex and the City movie, but that hasn’t stopped people snapping it up : and nor has the fact that it costs £4,530,either! The dress went into Net-a-Porter’s ‘New In’ section yesterday, and by mid-morning it was already sold out, so unless they only had a couple in stock, we guess we might be seeing a few Carrie-esque brides this summer. Sarah Jessica Parker is pictured in the original after the jump. What do you think, readers: is this the kind of thing you’d wear to your wedding?

      ASOS two-tone tights – as seen on Pixie Geldof

        No sooner had we stumbled upon these two-tone tights at the ASOS website earlier today, than our officers also spotted Pixie Geldof out and about in them in London. Clearly then, these tights are just begging to be written about, and so here they are! What does everyone think of them? We think it's an interesting idea, but we'd probably prefer a colour other than the nude/black versions, which seem to have the effect of bare legs with paint down the back of them. Your thoughts? The tights themselves are £10 – you'll find a picture of Pixie wearing hers under the jump…

      Style on Trial: Jennifer Lopez in drop-crotch pants

      You know how we keep on thanking our lucky stars that harem pants don’t actually seem to making it into mainstream fashion, despite appearing in great numbers in every store in the land? Looks like we spoke too soon, because here’s Jennifer Lopez, striding out proudly in her very own pair of drop-crotch pants. The thing about this, though, is that although the crotch is close to her knees, which is an automatic Fashion Police penalty, the fact that she’s wearing these with tall boots almost makes it look like she’s just wearing a skirt. Now, we know the argument here would be, “Well, if she wants to look like she’s wearing a skirt, why doesn’t she just WEAR a skirt?”…

      Alexander McQueen emerges as leader of harem pant movement

      Such is the unfortunate prevalence of harem pants in our world today that we've been forced to give up pointing out individual atrocities and simply throw them all into the Harem Hall of Shame, instead. We did. however, think these ones by McQ were bad enough to warrant a post all to themselves: So bad, it's like they bypassed "harem" territory altogether and just proceeded straight to "oh my God, I've just filled my diaper/nappy." In fact, we think Alexander McQueen may even be doing it deliberately, playing up the diaper qualities of the look, and creating a silhouette that's as ridiculous as anything we've seen: These particular offenders are now safely confined in the Fashion Police jail (We didn't want…

      Shoe Porn: Chrissie Morris peep toe stripe insert pumps

        We wish that wasn't snake print in the paler sections of these shoes, but we're willing to live with it for the striking, geometric design and pale pink suede uppers. We're not sure we'd ever wear them, but we'd certainly enjoy looking at them. If you would, too, they're 1,050 euros (Ah.Yes. There is that…) and you can buy them here.

      Wanted! Fleur T swimwear from Topshop

       As you may well have guessed, The Fashion Police have been spending a lot of time thinking about swimwear recently. Well, it gives us something to do while the wind howls around the HQ and the rain pours down. Last summer, the high-waisted bikini brief made a welcome return to the swimwear scene, and we're pleased to see there are still some around this year, too. As well as being a little less revealing, and therefore more comfortable, than some of their low-riding counterparts, these also have a nice "Bathing Belle" kind of feel to them, and being the unashamed retro lovers we are, that has a lot of appeal. This navy polka dot bikini is by Fleur T, and…

      Dress of the Day: Water Lily prom dress by Monsoon Fusion

        Floral dresses are pretty ubiquitous once we enter the Spring/Summer season, and they're definitely not to everyone's taste. If you're a true girlie-girl, though, and love nothing better than a pink, floral dress, that maybe has a bit of tulle underneath to make it stick out that little bit more, here's Monsoon's 'Water Lily' dress, which we think is a great example of the floral genre. We love that wide, shoulder-exposing neckline, and, despite not being big fans of florals, we even like the print. It's £60 and you can buy it here.

      Fashion Fraud Squad: Alexander McQueen Vs Oasis drape front dresses

      When we featured Alexander McQueen's drape-front dress back in March of last year, we said it probably wouldn't be long until a high street version appeared on the scene. Well, we had to wait over a year, and Oasis's bubble hem belted dress isn't exactly the same as it, but it was close enough for our Fraud Squad to bring it to our attention, so it may well be close enough for McQueen fans to want to give it a try. If you do, it's £50 from here, compared to the £1,062 the Alexander McQueen version originally cost.

      Fashion Crime: Sticky labels on the soles of shoes, as modelled by Jameela Jamil and Diana Vickers

      Aaargh! Now, we know, we know: those white labels on the soles of shoes are pesky little buggers, and getting them off frequently has us cursing like sailors, not to mention breaking our nails in the process. (A little bit of hot water and a nail brush usually does the trick, we find, but we still wish shoe retailers would just stop sticking labels there in the first place.) That, however, is no excuse for going out with the labels still proudly in place, as  Diana Vickers and Jameela Jamil (don’t worry, you’re not supposed to have heard of them -they’re minor British “celebrities”) did to last week’s London premiere of ’17 Again’. In these particular cases we accept that the…

      Fabiola Beracasa joins the Lady Gaga school of “naked” style

       As far as we can tell, Fabiola Beracasa is a socialite noted for her "impeccable style". She's also apparently been taking style types from Lady Gaga, because here she is at an event in New York last week, rocking the "look, I'm totally naked except for this blazer! Ha, no I'm not!" look. When Gaga did this, we thought it was a one-off. We also thought it was more or less par for the course with the good Lady, so we weren't too concerned about the look catching on. This second sighting, however, makes us worry that a "trend" may be emerging. Don't worry, folks, we're on it, if so…

      Dress of the Day: Catherine Malandrino cotton petal-detail sundress

        The clocks move forward here in the UK this weekend (yes, we’re behind everyone else for some reason) which means The Fashion Police are in the mood for Spring. That’s possibly why we’re willing to forgive the neckline of this Catherine Malandrino dress fro looking a little bit too much like an actual flower, and just enjoy the sunny, Spring feeling it inspires in us instead. If you’d like to enjoy it too, it’s £595 from Net-a-Porter.

      Fashion Deals, Discount Codes & Sales

      Get up to 50% off in the Coast Mid Season Sale – hurry ends soon! New Look – 20% off this weekend only with code MOSTWANTED20 Barratts -free delivery on web ordersover £50 with code DELAWB Get up to 25% Off your online purchase during the Big Brand Event at House of Fraser! Offer Expires: 27.03.09 at midnight

      Stella McCartney is offical designer of Fashion Police prison uniforms

        For a long time now, one question has plagued and troubled us: what kind of uniform should we make the inmates of the Fashion Police jail wear? At first we thought we'd keep it simple and make a combination of Crocs and harem pants our official uniform. Then we realised some of our prisoners would probably actually enjoy that, and the jail is supposed to be a place of punishment and correction, so we were thrilled to find that Stella McCartney has done the hard work for us, and designed an outfit that's just perfect for our purposes. Yes, these Stella McCartney dungarees are the kind of outfit that will give no pleasure to anyone. A combination of your…

      Possibly the most confusing (and obscene!) ugly prom dress we’ve ever arrested…

        What. The. HELL? Is that a… ? No, it can’t be. It just can’t. But it looks like…? No. We refuse to believe it. It’s just an unfortunate design, that’s all. A really, really unfortunate design. A really unfortunate design that’s just earned this dress its own special place in the Fashion Police Jail, where we hope it will take the time to think about what it’s done here. Now, let us never speak of this again. [image source] (Thanks to Louisa for the report!)

      Kathy Griffin: Maybe just a little bit overdressed for a shopping trip?

        We can kinda see where Kathy Griffin was coming from with this outfit. Sure, it's just a little OTT to go shopping in, but then, sometimes we've been tempted to throw on a prom dress for a shopping trip too. Well, it's a shame to leave them all hanging in the closet day after day, isn't it? So, although this particular dress is… not to our taste… we're reluctant to step in and arrest her for it. And hey, maybe the world would be a better place if everyone just got totally overdressed from time time to time? (Although maybe not in pink and blue frills) In fact, given that so many offices have "Casual Fridays", maybe it's time…

      Handbag of the Week: Heart box clutch from River Island

        We've featured heart-shaped handbags here before, but what can we say: it would appear that we like them! And it would appear that we like them enough to make one of them our Handbag of the Week. Ah well, no point fighting it… The bag in question is from River Island, and will cost you £21.99. Has it stolen your heart, though? (Sorry.)

      Around our blogs this week…

      As the tributes continue to pour in for Jade Goody, the Grumpy Old Bloggers wonder how sincere they all are? Keeping It Realtor finds some houses that are strictly for the birds. Dollface reviews The Body Shop’s new Tantalising Lip Butter. And Forever Amber has a work-related announcement to make…

      Dress of the Day: origami pencil dress from Oasis

      You're going to have to visit the Oasis website and use the "zoom" function there to get the full effect of this dress, which can only really be properly appreciated in close-up. The "origami" neckline is the main selling point here, and the focal point of the dress, which is £75. The grey colour and classic shape means that it'll be suitable for work, etc, with the neckline helping to make it a little more interesting. Get it here.

      Wanted! Loeffler Randall circle ruffle one piece swimsuit

        OK, so it may not be the most practical swimsuit you've ever owned, and it's unlikely to be the cheapest, but we like the combination of the simple bodice and ruffled shoulder on this Loeffler Randall one-piece. Trying to pack light for your vacation? No problem: throw on a pair of shorts/skirt/trousers or even jeans with this, and you'll have yourself  a nice little evening look too. Yes, we know it'll be a lot like wearing a bodysuit, but we promise not to tell if you don't…

      Style on Trial: Narciso Rodriguez Charmeuse silk striped skirt

        Ooh-er! This skirt gave us quite a turn when first we laid eyes on it, over at Net-a-Porter: in fact, we had our citation pads out and we were all ready to swoop in and make an arrest, when it hit us: this skirt is not what it appears to be. You see, at first glance we’d assumed it was fashioned entirely out of thin strips of fabric, so your body underneath those strips would be left completely exposed. And, well, you know what some of those celebrities are like: if a skirt like that were available, we just know some of them would jump at the chance of wearing it,and NOT ON OUR WATCH is all we can…

      A letter from the editor…

      I HAD thought this would go without saying, but apparently not, so just to clarify: People who post comments here telling me they hope my house gets bombed because I don't like harem pants will be deleted and banned. Yes, "kaylie", that means you. People who post comments saying I should be "shot in the head" because I like a certain dress, will also be deleted and banned. In summary: debate/ discussion/disagreement/different opinions = good, as long as you're not aggressive or rude about it. Threats of violence/ hatred/personal attacks and abuse = bad, and will result in the old "delete and ban" rule coming into effect. So, basically, what I'm saying is, "play nice, people". Absolutely nothing on this site…

      Dress of the Day: Red ‘Jessica’ wiggle dress by by Pinup Couture

      We could’ve nominated just about any of the dresses at Pin-Up Girl Clothing for Dress of the Day, but because we can’t seem to resist red at the moment, we’ve gone for this ‘Jessica’ wiggle dress which is – well, it’s sex in a dress, isn’t it? It’s also available in black, is $88 and is available here. Just don’t blame us if you find your bank balance sadly depleted after a visit to the site, OK?

      Style on Trial: Geri Halliwell at the premiere of The Boat That Rocked

        Geri Halliwell caused a bit of stir when she wore this little gold mini dress to the London premiere of The Boat That Rocked earlier this week. The Sun, for instance, thought Geri looked just a little bit desperate in the outfit, saying: "That dress screams: “I AM BACK ON THE MARKET, CHAT ME UP. I’M NOT DESPERATE, HONEST.” Other commentators, however, were a little kinder, saying she looked glowing and gorgeous and totally stole the show. We have a bit of a soft spot for Geri, so we think she looks pretty good here, but what do you think, readers? Love it or loathe it?

      Wear or Die: Cher’s Oscar Fashion Edition

        This week's Wear or Die was inspired by Fashion Police reader Molly, who suggested we force our readers to dress up like Cher – or die. "Well, why the hell not?" we thought. And so it is that today you find yourselves in the unenviable position of choosing between one of the two Oscar night fashions above. Neither are outfits for the faint-hearted, but what if you HAD to wear one of them – or die? Which one would you choose? The outfit on the left may look initially more frightening, but the one on the right reveals much more skin. Just to level out the playing field a little, we're going to allow you to ditch the hat/wig/whatever…

      Ugly Prom Dress Alert: the belly button dress

      Oh, what a tragedy! An Ugly Prom Dress that wouldn't even be an Ugly Prom Dress but for one tiny detail: the belly button hole. Now, it's our contention that belly buttons have no place at prom. None at all. This dress, however, makes the belly button the centrepiece of the whole outfit, ringing it with rhinestones as if to say "Look! A belly button! Betchya never saw one of these bad boys before!" Yes, it's all about the bellybutton here, and the overall effect is to make the model look like she needed emergency keyhole surgery, and the surgeon didn't have time to remove the dress first. For this reason, and this reason alone, this dress has earned it's…

      Hussein Chalayan attempts to make builder’s butt fashionable

      Builder's butt. It's one of the most heinous of fashion crimes, but luckily for us, it's a crime that tends only to be committed by actual builders. Oh, and by reality TV "stars", obviously. Now, however, it's also being committed by models in Hussein Chalayan's Fall 09 fashion show. These aren't their real butts, of course: they're fake ones. But somehow we don't think that's going to get them off the hook if they ever find themselves facing the Fashion Police jury, do you? [Source]