January 29th, 2009
The Harem Hall of Shame: where harem pants go when they get arrested by The Fashion Police
It's well established that harem pants are Public Enemy # 2 as far as The Fashion Police are concerned (Public Enemy # 1 : Crocs) so, as you can imagine, this is a particularly busy time for us as we struggle to arrest all of the harem crimes we find around the web.
Rather than bring you news of each new drop crotch crime as it happens, however, we thought we'd just round 'em all up and dump them in the same place. That place we call The Harem Hall of Shame, and here are just a few of its inmates. These aren't necessarily the WORST harem pants we've ever seen, they're just the latest – remember, harem pant crimes are on the rise, and if you see one it's your duty to report it to The Fashion Police!
Above: ASOS crinkle jersey harem pants
Vanessa Bruno jersey harem pants. Compared to the pants at the top of the page, these aren't too bad, until you realise Net-a-Porter are describing them as "track pants". You know, like you'd wear to the gym? We'd hate to see someone try to use the stationery bike in these…
Vero Moda wet look harem pants. There is never a good reason to be wearing wet look harem pants. Never.
Harem pants for men. Again: no need!
Harem jeans. They make The Fashion Police cry.
Harem jumpsuit. The queen of the harem.
And the most worrying thing of all? There's plenty more where that little lot came from…
Do people wear these? Seriously?
It looks as though someone sewed up the neck bit of their top in a pinch, and slipped in on their legs.
“Oh no I have spaghetti all over my pants, good thing I have a sewing kit and my grandma’s voluminous sweater!”
The third photo and the very last photo are bearable. The rest, shouldn’t exist!
The only one that doesn’t piss me off is the jumpsuit…it reminds me of Yves Saint Laurent’s spring collection if memory serves…I didn’t LOVE it, but it was kind of like skirts sown together at the bottom with little leg holes. I mean to say, they looked like SKIRTS, not droopy drawers. The jumpsuit is more along that line.
Were the men’s ones (with lovely matching footwear) a recent arrest? If so, they’ve already been withdrawn in shame…
I agree with the sweater on your legs comment. Thats exactly what I thought they looked like.
…I confess, the past week my tablemate and I have made 20+ pairs out of raw silk. However, and it’s a huge however, they’re for a production of Lion King in Vegas; does this count as acceptable? forgiveable? (10 elephants, and an assortment of cheetahs, gazelles, giraffes, and other random Pride Land puppeteers)
UGH! Seeing these bothers the crap out of me. Like it makes my OCD self want to go up to the wearer and yank the pants up past their chest. That baggy, diaper-y crotch is just… WRONG.
i knew someone who wore this to a ballet class… it didn’t look that bad while she was dancing but in my opinion there is NO other excuse to wear harem pants.
They just look like diaper pants, you couldn’t pay me enough to wear those in public.
i would wear the first one… asleep, in my bed, at night when no one else can see me, and then take them off really quickly when i wake up!
Wooo-hoooo!!!
I guess they’re a wonderful thing if you suffer from a sensitive bladder or diarrhea. Wear nappies and warm underpants without any fear of a visible panty line.
Also on partys they’re wonderful, as a week supply of chicken wings, prawn cocktail, cinnamon buns and a whole wedding cake can be hidden and brought home safely in these pants.. No need to cook, just make sure you’re invited on a regular base. Just take care you haven’t eaten beans or onions to prevent the good stuff from getting strange flavours.
And if your thighs are not anorectic enough, noone will notice, as everyone will blame the ass widening effect on the pants.
Your legs are as short as mine?
NO problem. Pull them uuuup to your shoulders, and they’ll fit perfectly. Great for pregnancy, too.
Awesum !1111!!!!!oneeleven!!112
The only issue might be their total fugliness…
The first one is SO BAD. I bet she’s tall..but in this, she looks like she is no taller than 4′10