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Archive for May, 2008
 Yes, it’s that big pink Checkpoint of doom again! We’re finishing up for the weekend, but that doesn’t mean we don’t want to know what you’re wearing! The Fashion Police Checkpoint will be here all weekend, helping weed out the fashion criminals among you (Note: not really – it’s just for fun) by forcing you to tell us what you’re wearing before you can pass.
Don’t forget to come back and tell us what you wear over the rest of the weekend, too!
If you’re going to be buying a black cocktail dress, chances are you’re going to want it to possess some kind of stand-out detail to set it apart from… well, from all the other black cocktail dresses in the world. Well, this dress by Bill Blass certainly has that stand-out detail, in the shape of the dramatic bubble hem. The bodice shape, however, is fairly classic, which means you can get away with the extravagant skirt without feeling like you’re playing dress up. Nice with a narrow waist belt, to give it a pop of colour, you’ll find it at Net-a-Porter for £3515. * Gulp *
 When we first came across this dress, we thought it was just another one of Maison Martin Margiela’s "Make you look naked" numbers. Because, after all, doesn’t everyone want to look naked, even when they’re not?
After a few seconds, though, we got distracted by what looked at first sight to be some flabby flesh hanging from the model’s shoulder, and realised that this situation was worse than we’d at first thought, because this is not just a dress: this is a purse dress. You know: a dress that is also a purse. Praise be! At last we can keep our valuables close to our hearts – well, close to our boobs, at least – and we’ll never have to worry about mislaying our purse ever again, because it’ll be attached to us, always.
That kind of peace of mind just has to be worth $425 to you, no?
We love bows. We love metallics. We love clutch bags. So it stands to reason that we would also love this Valentino bow clutch bag, even although it’s been around for ages now: an oldie, but a goodie, is what we say.
Of course, what we’d really, really love would be to find a version that costs less than $895 – quite a bit less, in fact. Any suggestions?
Here at The Fashion Police, our general rule of thumb foot is that when it comes to high heels, the higher the better. And we’ll never say "no" to a bit of a platform either. But you have to draw the line somewhere, of course, and our question for you today, readers is: where do you draw that line?
Take these stilettos by dSquared2, for instance. That heel is 5.5" inches high, and while the correspondingly high platform means that you won’t be thrown off balance quite as much as you would without it, these will still give you a pretty good height boost, and cause people to ask how on earth you can walk in them all day long.
Could you walk in them? And, just as importantly, would you want to? What’s your limit when it comes to high heels? We tend to stop at around 4", but what about the rest of you?
 Oooh, you’ll catch your death in that, young lady! What about a nice cardigan over the top to keep you warm? You could spit peas through that!
Sorry, we suddenly started channeling our mothers for a moment there – a sure sign that we’re getting old. Not as sure a sign, of course, as the fact that when The Fashion Police used to regularly go clubbing, not everyone dressed as pole dancers. In those days, only pole dancers dressed as pole dancers. And, OK, certain Fashion Criminals we could name. (Hi, Britney!)
Now, if websites like Great Glam are to be believed, there’s a pole dancer in each and every single one of us. And she’s just bustin’ to get out of that dress…
 We guess this top must be, like, really, really stylish. Seriously, it must be – it has ‘Baby Phat’ written all over it, providing a handy visual clue to the style-challenged that this top is DESIGNER (if Baby Phat can be called that), and therefore seriously cool. No question.
As the Fashion Police haters never tire of telling us, if something is DESIGNER then it is automatically fabulous, and while Baby Phat isn’t quite up there with Chanel, they clearly do consider themselves important enough to have splashed their logo all over their clothes, thus turning the people who buy their clothes into walking billboards for the brand. And also walking Fashion Criminals.
What do you think of highly visible logos on clothes? Automatic Fashion Police arrest, or can you tolerate them?
 Forever Amber enters Fake Tan Hell.
Dollface is all about Tweezerman tweezers. Or any tweezers, basically.
The Realtor finds the perfect thing for relaxing in the garden.
And the Grumpy Old Bloggers ask, "Should Wogan stay or go from Eurovision?"
Well, come on – you didn’t spend all that time on the abs machine at the gym, only to cover yourself up for prom, did you?
Spotted an Ugly Prom Dress? Call The Fashion Police!
 There’s a whole lotta designer influence going on with this River Island dress. It reminds us a lot of the one-shouldered Lela Rose dress that was selling at Net-a-Porter not so long ago, and, of course, Lela Rose and River Island aren’t the only ones to be pushing this one-shouldered design this season.
We’re loving the bright blue colour, and black belt detail, which will help to create that handspan waist effect (we wish!). And at £39.99, this dress isn’t too expensive either.
Related:
More Dress of the Day
Our Ugly Prom Dress archive
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