Fashion Police declare drop crotch pants crime of fashion

Dropcrotchpants Sad tidings from The Telegraph this month, folks. In an article on impractical fashion, Sarah Mower says:

"This is going to be the season of drop-crotch pants, cropped drop-crotch pants (with side volume), and certain pantaloons that appear to be close relations of the dhoti. They swathe the bottom and thighs in massive folds of material, swooping down to grip the calf at its widest point."

Now, we thought last year’s selection of Hammer-style Harem Pants were probably as bad as it was going to get, crotch-wise at least, but these are words to strike a chill into our beating hearts. There’s going to be even more of these things? And we’re going to be expected to wear them?

Oh, hell no. That’s it: we’re making a pre-emptive strike by declaring anything with a dropped crotch to be a crime of fashion, be it jean, pant, whatever. We don’t care what it’s made of, we just care that its crotch is in the right place, and that it won’t make us look like we’re wearing diapers underneath it. This Crime of Fashion law is effective immediately. Come on, then, 2008: we’re ready for you…

15 Comments

  • Take it away! Take it away!

  • Take it away! Take it away!

  • Reply January 21, 2008

    Avant-Garde K

    I don’t understand. Why is this design constantly being pushed?! It is not flattering in any way, and I honestly would have a hard time taking anybody that would wear these seriously.

  • Reply January 22, 2008

    Lucia

    Its like they said we want our crack to show, but make it look like we’re wearing high waisted jeans… and make our legs look ridiculously short. :(
    I will never wear these.

  • Reply January 22, 2008

    Fi

    No wonder the model refuesed to let her face be shown in the picture…
    Surely these are just high waisters that have fallen down? The poor girl just needs a belt.

  • Reply January 22, 2008

    Tiara

    How would you walk in that thing? Wouldn’t the dropped crotch rub painfully against your thighs?

  • Reply January 22, 2008

    Polly

    Oh how flattering? There is nothing I desire more in a jean than swathes of fabric around my bum, a croth near my knees and for the tightest part of the jean to land of the widest part of my carf! They are pure genius!

  • Reply January 29, 2008

    Fides

    eeeeeeekkk!!!!

  • Reply February 8, 2008

    Malibu Mad Man

    Hey… Lets bring back the camel toe pants….

  • Reply February 8, 2008

    trendinista

    “drop crotch pants” should be called “dropped a load pants”

  • Reply February 10, 2008

    mary poppins

    these remind me of the scene in marry poppins when burt (dick van dyke) pulls his crotch down to his ankles to dance with the penguins. not fashionable in any way. ever.

  • Reply February 10, 2008

    mary poppins

    these remind me of the scene in marry poppins when burt (dick van dyke) pulls his crotch down to his ankles to dance with the penguins. not fashionable in any way. ever.

  • Reply September 24, 2008

    pook

    where can I purchase these???

  • Reply January 9, 2009

    desiree

    totally calling this atrocity out on the next rants and raves.

  • Reply September 22, 2010

    Morrigan

    Totally hideous! I wouldn’t put my dog in these.

Leave a Reply