Opinion

Down the rabbit hole to meet Pocahontas: Guest Post by Caroline of Second Hand Shopper

Crimeoffashion

Caroline writes…

I wanted to apply to blog for The Fashion Police. I’m a regular reader, an irregular commenter and an all round fan of the site, on top of being a blogger in my own right. And who would want to give up this unique opportunity? No one in their right mind – that’s who!

So I tottered off into the world of online fashion to find some heinous fashion crimes on which to report. I know as well as the next girl just how deep a rabbit hole online fashion can be – a quick jaunt after that absolute must of a pocket-watch can suck you in for, let’s say, your whole 8-hour-long working day (on a slow week, you understand).You can easily end up adrift in a sea of blogs, drifting from one to the next until you cannot even remember in which direction you came. Suffice to say, it’s a bit of a maze out there.

Still, I persevered in my quest (persevere was our high school motto after all!) to find some fashion horrors not yet addressed by The Fashion Police. I was prepared to see the house of (insert designer of choice) come tumbling down like a house of cards under my derisive gaze. (Are you getting tired of the Alice in Wonderland puns yet? Yes? I’ll stop.) But, as if often the case, my quest taught me more about myself than I expected. As I drew nearer and nearer to the treasure that was my goal I began to realise something previously unrecognised in my personality. Something new and scary, something which, if left undiagnosed, could have turned around any moment to bite me on the proverbial.

I’m fashion fickle. 

That’s right, readers, I am fashion fickle. I cannot sit here and deride a trend with any conviction, as there’s every possibility that by next weekend? I’ll be wearing it.

I mean, there are some items I can promise never, ever to wear. The now infamous shants, for example, are never going to make it anywhere near my somewhat plentiful frame. Unless, of course, they were heavily layered up with a tunic, with contrasting tights underneath… see?! Now I want shants! (NOTE: I don’t actually want shants, but was trying to provide an example of a typically fashion fickle scenario. I mean, come on, I don’t wants shants!!! Or do I…?)

Fortunately, being fashion fickle does not limit the ability to criticise a particular item of clothing – Balanciaga’s Lego shoes, for example, or the Ksubi skinny overalls, both featured on the site. Neither does it impede my ire on the discovery of this fabulous little number, found while searching for dresses on eBay. A stunning Miss Sixty customised denim skirt & top/dress? Made from genuine Miss Sixty jeans to create the “effect” of a “fantastic Pocahontas inspired dress”. It must have been my lucky day!

For more fashionably fickle words from Caroline, visit her blog, Second Hand Shopper.

Would you like to be a guest blogger at The Fashion Police? Click here for more information.

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