Oh no. No, I don’t think I can get on board with this one at all. I mean, I used to love jodhpurs. That was back when I was twelve years old, though, and went horse riding every week, and those were modern jodhpurs – you know, the ones that are more or less like leggings? Not hugely flattering, but they did the job, and I’m guessing that, as unforgiving as all that lycra was, it’d still be more flattering than these Balenciaga jodhpurs, which are being tipped as the big thing for autumn. And OK, these Balenciaga models are rocking them for sure, but the thing about that? Well, they all look about fourteen, and probably weigh about the same as one of my thighs, don’t they?

I don’t think I’m going to be wearing jodhpurs this winter. Not unless I decide to go horse-riding, anyway, and even then, I think I’ll stick to the modern kind, that don’t make your hips look wider than your shoulders. Who needs to make their hips look bigger, anyway? Not me. Sorry, Balenciaga, but I think I’ll pass.