I’m not quite sure who ‘Patricia from Paris’ is, but having witnessed what she’s capable of, I can totally see why she’d want to remain anonymous. You can run, but you can’t hide from The Fashion Police, though, and we tracked these dresses down on the eDressMe website, where they are posing as "party dresses". God, I’m glad I wasn’t invited to that party…

While the multicoloured dress on the left could almost be excused, assuming you were wearing it to some kind of fancy dress party, the other two look like they’d probably burst into flames if you took them anywhere near a naked flame, and on those grounds alone, they deserve to be arrested. The strange thing about this is that, although these dresses look cheaper than chips, they’re actually up to $400 each – which is still significantly less than you’d have to pay me to wear them.

I’m saying nothing about the boots…