Monthly Archives

January 2007

Dresses

Dress of the Day: Alberta Ferretti Textured Wool Dress

Index_4

I’ve had this dress saved in my favourites for about six weeks now. I’ve no idea why, really: I mean, it’s not like I’m going to suddenly look into my wallet and say “why, here is a spare £510 I didn’t know I had – I will buy my beloved Alberta Ferretti dress with it!” No, I am doomed to only ever just look at this dress. But now it’s here, on my blawg, at least you lot can all look at it too, right?

Celebrity Fashion

Fashion Criminal: Sienna Miller (and the granny pants she rode in on…)

I think Anna Wintour’s expression says it all, really:

Siennamillerannawintour

Seriously, I’ve had nightmares where I’m out dressed like this. You know those dreams where you look down and suddenly realise that you forgot to put on your skirt – and worse, you’re wearing you biggest, ugliest pair of granny knickers? Well, Sienna is living the dream, folks – or that nightmare, rather, and we’re sending her straight to fashion jail for it. Sienna? You need to get over this whole "I’m so pretty I can wear anything and get away with it, and people will totally just think how quirky and stylish I am," thing you’ve got goin’ on. No, you can’t get away with just wearing a pair of control-top knickers. No, we won’t all be searching eBay for "Sienna’s big pants" in a few weeks time. Now, go and get dressed, woman…

Celebrity Fashion

Fashion Police at the Golden Globes: America Ferrera

America_ferrera2 Images_4 

Awards season must totally suck when you play Ugly Betty, no? I mean, you think you have a hard time deciding what to wear, imagine what it must be like being America Ferrera, with everyone watching you and wondering whether you’re going to be, well, ugly, or not? Well, she needn’t have worried: she is anything but ugly. This is such a flattering choice of dress – gorgeous shape, gorgeous colour, and HOT DAMN, would you look at the gorgeous curves on the woman?!

Celebrity Fashion

Fashion Police at the Golden Globes: Beyonce

Beyoncegoldenglobes

Oh, holy hell, Beyonce, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit… Did your mom make this dress for you? Did you make the fatal mistake of thinking, “Hell, my body is HAWT, I can totally get away with a shiny, bacofoil dress split RIGHT DOWN TO MY BELLY BUTTON, HA!” Did you, Beyonce? Because we are here to tell you you were wrong. What makes it worse? It’s the pose, Beyonce, the pose. Why did you do it to yourself?

Celebrity Fashion

Fashion Police at the Golden Globes: J. Lo

Jennifer_lopez Images_3   

My irrational hatred of Jennifer Lopez makes it hard for me to say this, so I’m just going to come right out with it: nice dress J.Lo. And also: well done – you managed to do understated chic, without so much of a whiff of your usual “Look at me! LOOK AT ME! I AM J.LO! JENNY FROM THE BLOCK, Y’ALL!” Well, OK, maybe just a whiff…

Celebrity Fashion

Fashion Police at the Golden Globes: Angelina Jolie

Angelina jolie golden globes 2007

Now, I ask you: does this look to you like a dress that has been hand-made by a team of designers working around the clock because its owner threw a strop, decided she didn’t have A THING to wear, and threatened to thkweam and thkwean until she was SICK unless they made something JUST FOR HER, pronto?

Nope, didn’t think so.

Grey, it is not a great colour for an evening dress, Angelina, and while there is a certain argument says you’d look good in a sack, there’s really no need to try it and see, is there? Perhaps the black woulda been the better bet after all…

 

 

Beyonce golden globes 2007

Beyonce at the 2007 Golden Globes

Oh, holy hell, Beyonce, I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit… Did your mom make this dress for you? Did you make the fatal mistake of thinking, “Hell, my body is HAWT, I can totally get away with a shiny, bacofoil dress split RIGHT DOWN TO MY BELLY BUTTON, HA!” Did you, Beyonce? Because we are here to tell you you were wrong. What makes it worse? It’s the pose, Beyonce, the pose. Why did you do it to yourself?

CAMERON DIAZ

Cameron diaz golden globes 2007

You know, a lot of people have been expecting us to bring poor ol’ Cameron in for this dress, but actually? I like it. Yes, I know, it surprised me too. It’s maybe not so much a Golden Globes dress, but hey, it would look pretty at a wedding – in fact, I’m pretty sure Monique Lhuillier put something a lot like this down her catwalk recently. Her bridal catwalk, that is.

All of that said, I think Cam’s looking mighty fine here. Love the drak hair/red lips/alabaster skin thing she’s got going on, and while, OK, this was an unusual choice for an awards show, I think it was a pretty brave one, and I think it just about paid off. So there.

Another one after the cut….

Cameron diaz leo di caprio golden globes 2007

I mean, come ON, people, lookit how cute she looks! And how… plump… Leo Dicaprio looks…

J. LO

Jennifer lopez golden globes 2007

My irrational hatred of Jennifer Lopez makes it hard for me to say this, so I’m just going to come right out with it: nice dress J.Lo. And also: well done – you managed to do understated chic, without so much of a whiff of your usual “Look at me! LOOK AT ME! I AM J.LO! JENNY FROM THE BLOCK, Y’ALL!” Well, OK, maybe just a whiff…

America Ferrera

America Ferrera 2007 golden globes

Awards season must totally suck when you play Ugly Betty, no? I mean, you think you have a hard time deciding what to wear, imagine what it must be like being America Ferrera, with everyone watching you and wondering whether you’re going to be, well, ugly, or not? Well, she needn’t have worried: she is anything but ugly. This is such a flattering choice of dress – gorgeous shape, gorgeous colour, and HOT DAMN, would you look at the gorgeous curves on the woman?!

Kate Winslet

Kate Winslet 2007 Golden Globes

Hey look, Kate Winslet came as a bride too<! How about that, then? Actually, Kate’s lookin’ pretty good too: but then, she always does, doesn’t she? Maybe just a wee bit pale for the dress, bit otherwise, take a Fashion Police gold star, girl. Just make sure you don’t go drinking any red wine…

Celebrity Fashion

Fashion Police at the Golden Globes: Cameron Diaz

Cameronidaz Images_1

You know, a lot of people have been expecting us to bring poor ol’ Cameron in for this dress, but actually? I like it. Yes, I know, it surprised me too. It’s maybe not so much a Golden Globes dress, but hey, it would look pretty at a wedding – in fact, I’m pretty sure Monique Lhuillier put something a lot like this down her catwalk recently. Her bridal catwalk, that is.

All of that said, I think Cam’s looking mighty fine here. Love the drak hair/red lips/alabaster skin thing she’s got going on, and while, OK, this was an unusual choice for an awards show, I think it was a pretty brave one, and I think it just about paid off. So there.

Another one after the cut….

Cameronleo

I mean, come ON, people, lookit how cute she looks! And how… plump… Leo Dicaprio looks…

Celebrity Fashion, Fashion News

Angelina Jolie unhappy with St. John

Angelinajolie_2 Pity poor Angelina Jolie, folks. As the current face of luxury fashion label, St. John, Angelina is contractually obliged to wear their clothes from time to time, with one of those occasions being this week’s Golden Globes ceremony. Angelina, however (looking lovely here in an image from the company’s website) is rumoured to be seriously unimpressed with St. John’s current collection – so much so that the company has been forced to design her a new gown from scratch.

St. John have reportedly created two one-off designs just for Angelina, one in black and one in grey. Will they meet with Jolie’s approval? Well, we don’t have long to wait to find out…

Dresses

Dress of the Day: Diane Von Furtsenberg Betty Wrap Dress

Dian Von Furstenberg dress

As perhaps the only person in the whole entire world who doesn’t look good in wrap dresses (they make me look frumpy and old, and Lord knows I can do without that, thanks very much), Diane Von Furstenberg is a designer who doesn’t really float my boat all that often. I’m making an exeption for this ‘Betty’ dress, though, which is very cute in a “mini mouse would wear this” kind of way, and which is down to £259 in the Net-a-Porter sale.

Ask the Fashion Police

Waistband Stretchers and Where to Buy Them

I have a confession to make here: no one actually asked us about waistband stretchers. Over at my other blog, Forever Amber, though, I get so many hits every day from people who’ve found me having run a search for “waistband stretchers” (seriously, we’re talking five or six hits per day, and all because I once wrote a post about my attempt to buy one of these damn things) that I’m convinced there is a real demand out there for devices which make your jeans fit better. Yes, y’all need waistband stretchers, apparently, and you need ’em bad! Enter the Fashion Police…

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Celebrity Fashion

Britney Watch: Bikini n’ Boots

Britney_4

Well, don’t you normally wear your bikini with a pair of cowboy boots to the beach? And, like, an almost totally see-through dress, to sling on when you’re heading back to the hotel and you want to cover up your modesty, but also, not really? Britney sure does. What worries me the most about this outfit? Well, in comparison to some of her recent efforts (and ONLY in comparison to some of her recent efforts), it’s actually not that bad…

Ask the Fashion Police

Ask The Fashion Police: Where Can I Find Shiny Gold Tights?

Dear Fashion Police, Any idea
where I can find some shiny gold tights?Gold Tights
Anon

Hello, our anonymous friend! You don’t say what denier of tights you’re looking for (or, indeed, where in the world you want to buy them), but I’m assuming that as you’re looking for something shiny and gold, you’re in the market for party tights. These are actually not so easy to find in January, with the party season well and truly over, but take a look after the jump and all will be revealed…

gold tights in gold stilettos

Pamela Mann Gold Lurex Tights

Et Voila! Gold lurex tights by Pamela Mann! These aren’t cheap at £9.99 a pair, but the lurex in them will make them a little bit harder to tear than most tights – well, it will if you’re not me, that is.

Wolford Neon 40 Tights

neo 40 gold tights

Even more jaw-droppingly expensive than the Pamela Martin numbers (£14.99! For a pair of freakin’ tights! That’ll be ripped to shreds by my dog the second I try to wear them! Eeek!) but they are Walford, so you can’t expect them to be cheap. They’re also fab, but you know that already…

More Gold Lurex Tights

sexy gold lurex tights
Yes, I know the picture shows them in silver, but they do them in gold too, I promise. These are $12 from We Love Colors,and they look pretty shiny to me…

Got a question for The Fashion Police? Ask it in the comment box…

Crimes of Fashion, Dresses

Crime of Fashion: See by Chloe Dungaree Dress

Chloe

Now, Chloe, I want you to know that it hurts us just as much as it hurts you to be calling one of your pieces a crime of fashion. You know The Fashion Police love you, Chloe: what you should also know by now, though, is that The Fashion Police have a (some would say irrational) hatred of anything to which the word “dungaree” could be implied. Dresses. Pants. It’s all the same to us, Chloe: if it has that distinctive “dungaree” look, we’re going to call “crime of fashion!” on it. We see no reason whatsoever why grown women should want to dress as giant toddlers – or giant, pregnant toddlers, as this dress would make us all look. Sorry, Chloe, but it had to be said…

Topshop’s Maxi Dungaree Dress

Topshop's Maxi Dungaree Dress

I’ve just double checked the calendar, but nope, it’s definitely not April 1st, so I can only assume that Topshop are being serious when they expect us to fork out £90 – NINETY POUNDS, PEOPLE! – for this dress. And OK, my own hatred for anything with the word “dungaree” in the title is well documented, but seriously, I’ve thought long and hard, and I just can’t imagine anyone who’d look good in something like this. I mean, the dress looks pregnant, even without a body in it. NINETY POUNDS they want for this – they done lost their minds…

Dresses

Dress of the Day: Vera Wang Lavender bubble hem dress

Vera Wang Lavender bubble hem dress

It’s no secret that I’m a big fan of Vera Wang – so much so that I’m getting married in one of her fabulous creations – sorry, Mr Bank Manager… I’m equally in love with her “Lavender” diffusion line, though (well, a girl can’t trip around in a wedding gown all the time, can she?), and particularly with this lovely green bubble hem dress. I’m actually a little surprised that I like this: I’ve always considered pockets on evening dresses to be something of a crime of fashion, and I’ve never really “got” the whole bubble hem thing. On this dress, though? It works. £300 from Net-a-Porter.

Outerwear

Wanted! Yellow Button Collar Jacket from Miss Selfridge

Jacket

Just speaking of the Miss Selfridge sale, isn’t this pretty? Say it is pretty. If I wasn’t currently being compelled to spend all my money on lingerie for my honeymoon, this baby would SO be coming home with Amber. I mean, it’s £25 – TWENTY. FIVE. POUNDS, people. And also: pretty. It’s the kind of jacket you could still wear into Spring, too, and come to think of it, would have made a nice "going away" jacket, if, of course, I didn’t already have me a nice "going away" jacket. Damn…

Dresses

Shopping the Sales: £5 dresses at Miss Selfridge

Untitled5

I know one of my new year’s fashion resolutions was to only buy things I really need, and not just buy them because they happen to be on sale, but Miss Selfridge are making that resolution really difficult to keep… Each of these dresses is just £5 in the sale: luckily for me (or actually, not so luckily, as it turns out) I have no life, and therefore have nowhere to wear the first two, but I’m loving the 60s vibe of the one on the end. Needless to say, they no longer have it in my size (shocker!), so I’m keeping my resolution, but only for now…

Lingerie, Wanted!

Wanted! Absolutely Everything from the Accessorize Lingerie Department…

Sexy Lingerie

Having just booked my honeymoon (YES! YES! I AM GOING ON HONEYMOON! SOON! WOO HOOO!) I find myself suddenly obsessed – perhaps unhealthily so – with buying lingerie, and, more specifically, buying lingerie from Accessorize. See, I’m not much of a “lace stockings and suspenders” kind of a gal. No, I like my undies colourful and I like them fun. Hopefully I’ll always feel like this, even when I am 91, but actually, probably not. Can you blame me, though? I mean, lookit! Fun, flirty and fashionable (oh the aliteration, it is embarrassing!), and also: cheap. See more after the jump, but just remember: these are MY pants (I mean “mine as in I’m totally going to buy them soon” not mine as in “ACTUALLY belonging to me”) so don’t y’all be buying them up now…

Sexy Lacy Pants